Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

GettingItRight

OP, just drop the guy and save the grief and uncomfortable days ahead which his kids (and maybe yours) are going to experience.

Maybe I am wrong in saying the above sentence, but I think you have to think about those who are going to be affected, that is, if you successfully got him to ditch his wife and kids.

I am not trying to bring you down or put you in bad light. If the guy had separated from his wife, then obviously this would be a different story, but I think you should strongly consider the impact such a result would bring to all those that would be affected.

I don't know the guy, I'm sure he is a nice guy if you ignore the situation, but I just think that you are fulfilling his emotional needs/ego.

mountainofdebt

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

PTN, make or break in what sense?

Perhaps PTN has finally told him that he's either in her bed 100% or 0% of the time and that there are no other options open to him.

Though how this can be reconciled with PTN's continued protests that Mr Loser has to make the final decision himself I don't know .....

northerner77

purpletoenails wrote: »

Yes, I meant I'm not intentionally destroying anyone, amd I have already admitted that my actions are selfish regarding this affair.

I have asked him if he's had affairs before and he has said no. I do believe him, so in answer to northerner77, yes I am the 1st and I'd like to think I will be the last but I can't predict the future sadly.

How did you word it when you put it to him?

I have no personal experience but actually I am starting to come round on the previous point (above bit). HE is the real tw.t in all this. And that's coming from a bloke.

northerner77

Money_maker wrote: »

So how old will the dear 'little' children be before he feel man enough to leave - 40?

So sorry for you PTN. I think that deep inside you know that there will always be an excuse. And I think you have accepted that and are prepared to sacrifice the rest of your life for him. You can lead a horse to water...

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.
Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future (a bit like Tony Blair, maybe Blair's a woman really).
After 70, they become Albania or Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like Libya - ruled by a !!!!!!.

Marisco

Excellent northerner :rotfl:I'd dispute the 50 to 60/frigid climate though :D

POPPYOSCAR

northerner77 wrote: »

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.
Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future (a bit like Tony Blair, maybe Blair's a woman really).
After 70, they become Albania or Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like Libya - ruled by a !!!!!!.

Not my type of humour I'm afraid. Stereotyping women like that.

Also I think it is a cop out to say that all men are ruled by sex. Plenty of men do not have affairs, or even want to, and are quite happy to stick to one women.

gratefulforhelp_2

One wonders if it is the people with less imagination who can't be happy with the one partner?

Marisco

Well, I'm a woman and thought it was hilarious!!:D

purpletoenails

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

PTN, make or break in what sense?

As in if we can't work out between us a solution that makes us both happy then there will be no point in continuing the relationship at present.

mountainofdebt wrote: »

Though how this can be reconciled with PTN's continued protests that Mr Loser has to make the final decision himself I don't know .....

He's not Mr. Loser.

northerner77 wrote: »

How did you word it when you put it to him?

I have no personal experience but actually I am starting to come round on the previous point (above bit). HE is the real tw.t in all this. And that's coming from a bloke.

I just asked him outright. Like I said, I've got not reason to believe that he wasn't telling the truth.

shellsuit

purpletoenails wrote: »

As in if we can't work out between us a solution that makes us both happy then there will be no point in continuing the relationship at present.

He's not Mr. Loser.



I just asked him outright. Like I said, I've got not reason to believe that he wasn't telling the truth.

He's a lying, deceitful cheat, which in my eyes makes him worse than a loser.

You see the caring, tender and loving side of him. You have no idea what he is like 24/7.