Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

purpletoenails

Money_maker wrote: »

I know I said I wouldn't post on here again but forums are quiet tonight so had a little peek.

Interesting post here. From this return comment, the youngest 'child' is 17.
17:eek:

We're not talking about putting little childrens needs before his own, we're talking about a nearly adult 17 year old.

So how old will the dear 'little' children be before he feel man enough to leave - 40?

So sorry for you PTN. I think that deep inside you know that there will always be an excuse. And I think you have accepted that and are prepared to sacrifice the rest of your life for him. You can lead a horse to water...

Yes and apparently, according to most posters it doesn't matter how old they are... he'll still be labelled a terrible father if he leaves and they'll never speak to him again.

MissMitch

vickylouise87 wrote: »

Why are you still here trying to justify yourself? No one is convinced that what you're doing is okay - you've just persuaded a board full of people that there are some truly awful people in the world, and that you are one of them.

Several times throughout this thread people have asked PTN to come back and update when she has left the thread alone for a while...then when they hear that she is not taking their advice or behaving how they would like several pages of indignation follow...

I think at first people genuinely wanted to know how PTN was and what she was doing, since she's obviously made the decision to keep having an affair for the time being asking her to come back and update now is just...I don't know...morbid curiosity? boredom?

There have been some really interesting discussions in this thread but I think now it's just rather :wall:

purpletoenails

vickylouise87 wrote: »

I have not broken up a marriage. They were in a long term relationship. yes a 9 year relationship a lot of marriages dont even last that long I could try and justify it by saying he was going to leave her anyway, regardless of me, but why should I? I can't run away from what I did. The difference between you and I is that I actually felt remorse. You feel inconvenienced. You feel remorse now, I doubt you did at the time you were doing it? And I don't feel inconvenienced

But no, it has never once crossed my mind that my partner wouldn't be faithful to me, always and forever. If I had to worry about that kind of stuff, I wouldn't be marrying him.

In the unlikely situation that you end up with this women's husband, you will never ever have the same assurance. How sad.

No one ever has a 100% assurance that their partner will be faithful to them, just look at the statistics - a fair proportion of people are going to be unfaithful during the lifetime of their marriage unfortunately. I also don't believe that because someone has been unfaithful once that they will go on to do it again.

purpletoenails

MissMitch wrote: »

Several times throughout this thread people have asked PTN to come back and update when she has left the thread alone for a while...then when they hear that she is not taking their advice or behaving how they would like several pages of indignation follow...

I think at first people genuinely wanted to know how PTN was and what she was doing, since she's obviously made the decision to keep having an affair for the time being asking her to come back and update now is just...I don't know...morbid curiosity? boredom?

There have been some really interesting discussions in this thread but I think now it's just rather :wall:

I agree, although there are a significant minority of really helpful posters.

I do wonder if some posters are trying to get a rise out of me for entertainment purposes lol.

POPPYOSCAR

MissMitch wrote: »

Several times throughout this thread people have asked PTN to come back and update when she has left the thread alone for a while...then when they hear that she is not taking their advice or behaving how they would like several pages of indignation follow...

I think at first people genuinely wanted to know how PTN was and what she was doing, since she's obviously made the decision to keep having an affair for the time being asking her to come back and update now is just...I don't know...morbid curiosity? boredom?

There have been some really interesting discussions in this thread but I think now it's just rather :wall:

Yes I agree.

I am interested in this thread for many reasons. It does throw up some interesting discussions at times and yes I am interested to know what the outcome will be, either way.

I completely understand the hurt feelings of some and respect the standpoint of others regarding the moral aspect of all this, but I am personally uncomfortable with the vitriolic posts that assume to know everything about the OP, her lover and his wife.I do not think they are helpful to anyone.

northerner77

purpletoenails wrote: »

I agree, although there are a significant minority of really helpful posters.

How many times has your bloke had affairs previously, ever broached the subject with him? Are you the first & last?

essexgirly

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

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I completely understand the hurt feelings of some and respect the standpoint of others regarding the moral aspect of all this, but I am personally uncomfortable with the vitriolic posts that assume to know everything about the OP, her lover and his wife.I do not think they are helpful to anyone.

I 100% agree. Well said x

Emmzi

I have no idea why PTN is still here. She has now had every opinion in the world, but has decided on her course of action. This feels like picking over the bones of a long dead thing.

an9i77

Don't worry I believe threads automatically get closed at 5000 posts - only another 898 to go then!

POPPYOSCAR

an9i77 wrote: »

Don't worry I believe threads automatically get closed at 5000 posts - only another 898 to go then!

Really?

Why are there threads still open with over 5000 posts then?