Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

POPPYOSCAR

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Ha ha, I once looked at a boy who had been really horrible to DD1, he caught my eye and fell down some steps!

He was ok, but a bit surprised. He left her alone after that.

:T

He probably thinks you are a witch now!

VestanPance

Marisco wrote: »

Don't be so ridiculous!! She could have found out she was pregnant, and then could have slept with her husband once. Anyway, nowhere does it say that the spouses did not know of the situation. I'm sure some people would be prepared to stay with "cheating" oh's, either for lifestyle, money, kids etc. That is the thing with forums, no one fully knows of others' circumstances, yet many are prepared to be very judgmental, based on the little that is posted here.

So she deceived a man in to believing a child was his. No chance of emotional trauma there then!

Forgiving a cheating partner is one thing. Very few would be willing to raise a child born from that deceit as their own. There is nothing good in that situation.

Also using a partner to sustain a lifestyle while treating them like nothing by lying, cheating and being deceitful is pretty much up there in the total scumbag personality type. Probably only can be topped in that instance by tricking someone in to raising a child as their own only for them to find out that child they loved and protected wasn't actually theirs at all.

POPPYOSCAR

VestanPance wrote: »

So she deceived a man in to believing a child was his. No chance of emotional trauma there then!

Forgiving a cheating partner is one thing. Very few would be willing to raise a child born from that deceit as their own. There is nothing good in that situation.

Also using a partner to sustain a lifestyle while treating them like nothing by lying, cheating and being deceitful is pretty much up there in the total scumbag personality type. Probably only can be topped in that instance by tricking someone in to raising a child as their own only for them to find out that child they loved and protected wasn't actually theirs at all.

But we do not know that this is what happened in the case quoted.The post was very short on actual detail.

gratefulforhelp_2

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

:T

He probably thinks you are a witch now!

For sure;)

euronorris

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Not for me, I do not wish to purposely inflict pain on those I love/have loved, this concept is alien to me.

That's fair enough.

The reason I've felt that way in the past, is because the other person seemed to suddenly have no regard for my feelings, or how his actions affected me. I wanted him to feel the exact same pain I felt, so that he would know what it felt like and accept that it was in fact a 'big deal'.

I couldn't think of any other way for him to truly understand that pain.

But, like I said, it's how you react to that feeling that counts. I didn't do anything, I just cut him out of my life as it was the only way I could succesfully move on and find happiness again. As it turns out, that was the one thing that did seem to hurt him. Weird.

Errata

Revenge? Leave a bottle of his wine on every doorstep in the village? Yep, I could do that. Cut one leg off every pair of trousers he owned? Yep, I could do that too. But the best revenge is living a far better life without them than with them.

POPPYOSCAR

I must admit I did laugh at the one I heard about where the ex sewed prawns inside the bottom of the curtains.

POPPYOSCAR

Lotus-eater wrote: »

I am the same and I know my OH is the same as well.

I thought my Mum and Dad were the same too, until they split up and it all went badly wrong.
I think if you've been so badly treated by the other person, lied to, led up the garden path and cheated. Then you may not find you being yourself.

I have had all this done to me, but I still did/do not feel any need to want to hurt or get revenge.I think I am the happier for it as well.

gratefulforhelp_2

And the one where she sowed grass seed while he was on holiday and watered his carpets.

POPPYOSCAR

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

And the one where she sowed grass seed while he was on holiday and watered his carpets.

:rotfl:

Could be the start of a whole new thread!!!!!