Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

nickyhutch

Lotus-eater wrote: »

She's not putting him through it, she's putting his wife through it.

I think we've both understood the original point differently. I see what you mean now.

princessdreamer

So you destroyed a family with children and you think they want to like you. However you don't care if they like you or not, so in reality all you care about is yourself, those poor children.

nickyhutch

princessdreamer wrote: »

Sleeping knowingly with a man who is sleeping with someone else shows little respect for their own sexual health if nothing else. Taking someone elses scraps usually older men. Being hated by friend and family of the family they destroyed. Not to mention having your own parents and child informed what you are and what you did by your new partners son.

Do you mean by this that your son told his new partner's child and her parents that she had had an affair with his Dad?

Lotus-eater

I'm sorry, but there is no way you can absolve the other woman of any blame, she knows the score and is selfish and uncaring enough about the other family, to go ahead.
The amount of selfishness applied IMO depends on the situation.

Now, you may have seen me on other threads saying how you have to look after your own, which is true of course, but only to the extent of trying not to put undue hurt on others.

I sound a bit judgemental here, which I'm not and I'm far from perfect myself.

princessdreamer

nickyhutch wrote: »

Do you mean by this that your son told his new partner's child and her parents that she had had an affair with his Dad?

Well someone had to she/he were telling so many lies.

nickyhutch

princessdreamer wrote: »

So you destroyed a family with children and you think they want to like you. However you don't care if they like you or not, so in reality all you care about is yourself, those poor children.

You know nothing about these poor children and my relationship with them and it's really not appropriate to discuss it on this (or any other) thread. I know I brought it up in response to your point, but I wont be talking any further about them. Suffice to say that I did not say that I don't care whether they like me or not - I said I don't mind whether they do, which means it is up to them - I can't expect them to like me and wont force the issue with them. It's their decision.

nickyhutch

princessdreamer wrote: »

Well someone had to she/he were telling so many lies.

So you enlisted your son? Why didn't you do it? I do think the children should be kept right out of all the nastiness that's bound to arise when families split.

princessdreamer

nickyhutch wrote: »

You know nothing about these poor children and my relationship with them and it's really not appropriate to discuss it on this (or any other) thread. I know I brought it up in response to your point, but I wont be talking any further about them. Suffice to say that I did not say that I don't care whether they like me or not - I said I don't mind whether they do, which means it is up to them - I can't expect them to like me and wont force the issue with them. It's their decision.

No when you bedded their father it was your decision you caused it you put them through hell and now you don't give a damn. Then again what did anyone expect

nickyhutch

princessdreamer wrote: »

No when you bedded their father it was your decision you caused it you put them through hell and now you don't give a damn. Then again what did anyone expect

You make it sound like my OH had no choice in the matter! It was his decision too, you know. You forget, I think, that his wife was playing away, so she was making that decision to "put them through hell" too. She put them through even more hell (IMO) by moving her new fella in to the home within weeks of OH leaving.

princessdreamer

nickyhutch wrote: »

So you enlisted your son? Why didn't you do it? I do think the children should be kept right out of all the nastiness that's bound to arise when families split.

See that is where you are wrong I did the opposite my son found all the evidence for himself including a lot of !!!!!! stuff relating to her. He blew a fuse and told the lot of him what he though of them,
Why didn't I do it, not worth my effort her kid and family are nothing to do with me.