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Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

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Comments

  • Kay_Peel
    Kay_Peel Posts: 1,672 Forumite
    Yes, but that's a very odd stance, if you wouldn't do it, why put some other person through the same thing?

    I think everyone has to accept that there are different sorts of infidelity.
    There is the one night stand.
    There is the unhappy relationship and doing nothing about it, till someone else comes along. (Nicky)
    There is the unhappy, or not fulfilled relationship, which the person doesn't want to leave, yet wants something else to make them happy. (PTN's)

    I'm sure others too.

    There is the infidelity which deceives one party into believing that s/he is in a happy, fulfilling marriage, committed to the upbringing of children together for life, but where the other party is already planning to leave.
  • Lotus-eater
    Lotus-eater Posts: 10,789 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Kay_Peel wrote: »
    There is the infidelity which deceives one party into believing that s/he is in a happy, fulfilling marriage, committed to the upbringing of children together for life, but where the other party is already planning to leave.
    That's number 2.
    Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.
  • jetplane
    jetplane Posts: 1,615 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I am happy enough with my own positive outlook

    Positive? Really? But you sound very bitter and your attacks on nickyhutch are too personal so much negativity in your posts.
    mistresses are just women with little respect for themselves.

    You know your wrong, its the wife they don't respect not themselves.

    Ex wives use these cliche's to convince themselves that the mistress is a bad woman, just as the mistress uses cliche's to convince themselves that their lovers are not bad men.
    The most potent weapon of the oppressor is the mind of the oppressed. Steve Biko
  • nickyhutch
    nickyhutch Posts: 7,596 Forumite
    Yes, but that's a very odd stance, if you wouldn't do it, why put some other person through the same thing?


    I'm sure others too.

    She's not putting him through it, he's choosing to do it. PTN, if she were married, would leave if she was unhappy, before starting a relationship. Her MM obviously doesn't feel the same way.
    ******** Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity *******
    "Always be calm and polite, and have the materials to make a bomb"
  • nickyhutch
    nickyhutch Posts: 7,596 Forumite
    jetplane wrote: »
    Positive? Really? But you sound very bitter and your attacks on nickyhutch are too personal so much negativity in your posts.



    You know your wrong, its the wife they don't respect not themselves.

    Ex wives use these cliche's to convince themselves that the mistress is a bad woman, just as the mistress uses cliche's to convince themselves that their lovers are not bad men.

    You're right, IMO.
    ******** Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity *******
    "Always be calm and polite, and have the materials to make a bomb"
  • jetplane wrote: »
    Positive? Really? But you sound very bitter and your attacks on nickyhutch are too personal so much negativity in your posts.



    You know your wrong, its the wife they don't respect not themselves.

    Ex wives use these cliche's to convince themselves that the mistress is a bad woman, just as the mistress uses cliche's to convince themselves that their lovers are not bad men.
    Sleeping knowingly with a man who is sleeping with someone else shows little respect for their own sexual health if nothing else. Taking someone elses scraps usually older men. Being hated by friend and family of the family they destroyed. Not to mention having your own parents and child informed what you are and what you did by your new partners son.
    mortgage free by christmas 2014 owed £5,000, jan 2014 £4,170, £4,060, feb £3,818 march £3,399 30% of the way there woohoo
    If you don't think you can go on look back and see how far you've come
  • Lotus-eater
    Lotus-eater Posts: 10,789 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    nickyhutch wrote: »
    She's not putting him through it, he's choosing to do it. PTN, if she were married, would leave if she was unhappy, before starting a relationship. Her MM obviously doesn't feel the same way.
    She's not putting him through it, she's putting his wife through it.
    Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.
  • She's not putting him through it, she's putting his wife through it.

    apparently the wives do not matter only the perfect (PMSL) relationship that comes from being a mistress
    mortgage free by christmas 2014 owed £5,000, jan 2014 £4,170, £4,060, feb £3,818 march £3,399 30% of the way there woohoo
    If you don't think you can go on look back and see how far you've come
  • nickyhutch
    nickyhutch Posts: 7,596 Forumite
    edited 15 October 2011 at 3:16PM
    Sleeping knowingly with a man who is sleeping with someone else shows little respect for their own sexual health if nothing else. Taking someone elses scraps usually older men. Being hated by friend and family of the family they destroyed. Not to mention having your own parents and child informed what you are and what you did by your new partners son.

    But princess, how I feel about my sexual health (you're wrong, by the way) is my business, and I've never had anything so never infected anyone. Respect for my own sexual health? What the heck are you on about?

    "Someone else's scraps" implies that he was no longer wanted, and wouldn't be missed, so in that case the ex wouldn't be too bothered, would she? Mine is older by 9 months, although what that has to do with the price of fish, I'm not sure.

    I don't know friends and family of OH's ex, other than her children. They don't hate me. I think they want to like and get on with me but daren't. I don't mind.

    "Not to mention having your own parents and child informed what you are and what you did by your new partners son" - I'm not sure what you mean by this.
    ******** Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity *******
    "Always be calm and polite, and have the materials to make a bomb"
  • nickyhutch
    nickyhutch Posts: 7,596 Forumite
    apparently the wives do not matter only the perfect (PMSL) relationship that comes from being a mistress

    The responsibility for the wife's happiness does not lie with a mistress. It's her own, and her husband's responsibility. I'm a wife. If my OH had an affair I'd blame him and look at what (if anything) about me and our relationship made him do it. I wouldn't blame the mistress at all. Why would it it her fault that my OH cheated on me? If he cheated with her because he loved her, that's not her fault. If he cheated with her because he was handy and available, that says more about him than it does about her.

    And stop banging on about the "perfect". I never said that.
    ******** Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity *******
    "Always be calm and polite, and have the materials to make a bomb"
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