Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

Jewel_2

petrolhead89 wrote: »

yes absolutely...:T your just as bad as he is and I can think of many names for "women" like you....

Why is she just as bad as him? She's free to do what she wants. It's him that's the problem, surely! He can back off if he wants to, she's not making him stay! Are you saying men aren't able to make decisions on their own?

vroombroom

erdd2 wrote: »

You may never forget but it would appear awful to remain stuck and unable to get over parents splitting up forever.

I'm over my parents splitting up - its what I had to deal with afterwards that I won't get over and yes I do hold my father responsible. The mother refusing to leave her bed, not eating for weeks, not going into work, bills not getting paid, threats from the mortgage company because my father didnt pay them, coming home from college or work terrified I might find my mother dead.

Then there was the harrassment from the thing he had an affair with.

I truly believe if he was unhappy and done things in a better way he and my mother could have split things up amicably and been friends.

Pollycat

Petrolhead89
I'm not going to quote your post because hopefully other posters will do as I've done and report it so it will be removed without trace of the despicable things you've posted.

That's the very first time I've ever reported a post for any reason.

Here's the reality:
The OP is single.
Her friend/lover (whatever you wish to call him) is married.

He is the one who has obligations and emotional ties to another person, not her.

POPPYOSCAR

Pollycat wrote: »

Petrolhead89
I'm not going to quote your post because hopefully other posters will do as I've done and report it so it will be removed without trace of the despicable things you've posted.

That's the very first time I've ever reported a post for any reason.

Here's the reality:
The OP is single.
Her friend/lover (whatever you wish to call him) is married.

He is the one who has obligations and emotional ties to another person, not her.

I hope they get pprd for that post as well.

FatVonD

Pollycat wrote: »

Here's the reality:
The OP is single.
Her friend/lover (whatever you wish to call him) is married.

He is the one who has obligations and emotional ties to another person, not her.

I think we are all in agreement that the vast majority of the blame lies in his direction but PTN is not totally blameless, she has a choice not to collude in deceiving another woman.

VestanPance

She's to blame as well. He's the one betraying his wife and family, but she's the vechile for that betrayal and has been for a very long time.

Bogof_Babe

Given the nature of the beast, i.e. the biological urge to impregnate as many women as possible, I think we can agree that in the main a married man is more driven to "misbehave" than a married woman might be.

If we therefore absolve all single women from any responsibility for avoiding getting entangled with a married man, affairs and adultery will become even more rife than they presently seem to be.

Surely if a woman knows a man has responsibilities that he has made a commitment to, he is not fair game even if he does make all the running. It takes two to tango, but only one to say "no thanks, you're not free".

There might be some young impressionable woman reading this thread right now, who has been flirted with by a married man at work, and she's now thinking "okay, why not?". And whoops there goes another family's security.

Errata

Surely if a woman knows a man has responsibilities that he has made a commitment to, he is not fair game even if he does make all the running.

Absolutely, and what woman would want a man who would be blithely prepared to be deeply unkind to those closest to him?

Person_one

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

Given the nature of the beast, i.e. the biological urge to impregnate as many women as possible, I think we can agree that in the main a married man is more driven to "misbehave" than a married woman might be.

That's a pretty convenient excuse.

VestanPance

I wouldn't say men are more likely to cheat than women. I think it's very much dependant on the person. I think in both sexes the feeling to rush out and notch up marks on the bed post, or gather attention from the opposite sex is often driven from personal insecurities.