Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

purpletoenails

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

Squid/squib is a common confusion. One's a fish and one's a firework . :rotfl:

If there's about ten of them going on holiday together he must have a big family (unless they are going with another family?). When he makes his decision I expect he will be all too aware of the disapproval he'll get from all and sundry if he dumps his wife for "another woman", even if they don't like her all that much. Just saying, as you need to bear in mind that there is so much more to all this than just what you two feel for eachother.

It's extended family on his wife's side, they tend to do all their socialising together. His own extended family is much smaller and dotted around the country. I do realise how much he has to lose, he would have to give up an awful lot, and he would have to be very brave to do that, and very certain that he wanted to be with me.

bonnie_bumpkins

I've read every post and my heart goes out to you...
FWIW I think not being able to see him before his hols will be a big positive in that it will focus you both on what you want.
x

Wickedkitten

purpletoenails wrote: »

He's off on his hols tomorrow for 2 1/2 weeks, and then the week he's back I'm off work and made plans to do some things with my children and we have a big birthday in the family (and of course gcse results that week too) so I can't really go gallivanting off. So it will be the beginning of September before we have the opportunity to meet up again!

You mean to say you haven't seen him since you issued the ultimatum? Wasn't that nearly a fortnight ago?

purpletoenails

Wickedkitten wrote: »

You mean to say you haven't seen him since you issued the ultimatum? I didn't issue an ultimatum Wasn't that nearly a fortnight ago?

We were supposed to meet yesterday but I had to cancel at the last minute.

Pollycat

PTN
you might not have actually issued an ultimatum in so many words, but I think that would be how your friend would see it.

I feel really sorry for you as you must have been really worked up about seeing him only for things to be cancelled.

I hope your daughter is OK, btw.

euronorris

I just had a thought....(I know, I know, I should be careful! lol But honestly, it's one that needs consideration).

You seem to live quite far away from each other, and he has kids. Soooo........even if he decides that he wants to end things with his wife, and he wants to be with you, do you think he would be able to cope with being so far away from his kids? I mean, moving within the same town, or even a couple of towns over, wouldn't be too bad, but it's a 5/6 hour round trip from where you live isn't it? Would you be prepared to move to make that aspect easier for him?

purpletoenails

Pollycat wrote: »

PTN
you might not have actually issued an ultimatum in so many words, but I think that would be how your friend would see it.

I feel really sorry for you as you must have been really worked up about seeing him only for things to be cancelled.

I hope your daughter is OK, btw.

Thank you She's still poorly but a little better than yesterday.
Perhaps he did see it as an ultimatum, but it wasn't meant to be

euronorris wrote: »

I just had a thought....(I know, I know, I should be careful! lol But honestly, it's one that needs consideration).

You seem to live quite far away from each other, and he has kids. Soooo........even if he decides that he wants to end things with his wife, and he wants to be with you, do you think he would be able to cope with being so far away from his kids? I mean, moving within the same town, or even a couple of towns over, wouldn't be too bad, but it's a 5/6 hour round trip from where you live isn't it? Would you be prepared to move to make that aspect easier for him?

Good question! I would be prepared to move once my daughter had finished school, there is no way I would uproot her at the moment. So, thats 2 years away yet. Both our older children are at uni already.

nickyhutch

How old are his children, PTN?

Lotus-eater

I think you've given so much away about him, I would be careful, you might want to go back and delete some stuff.

Wickedkitten

purpletoenails wrote: »

We were supposed to meet yesterday but I had to cancel at the last minute.

Is it normal for you two to go that long without seeing each other?