Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

stargazer59

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

You need to read back properly and see who said what.

I think i have read pretty much the whole thread so no thank you, i know what i read!

In just your posts to me you are so superior!

Whether you worry about the effects of adultery or not does not give you the right to be judgmental of others. What you see as people being glib i see as them being honest and open, also they listened and responded calmly and politely.

As for the "cuckolded" ( what a quaint old fashioned term) wife and children, is it your place to speak on their behalf? do you not have a life of your own to live? When i called you unforgiving i meant your whole attitude, not the literal act of forgiveness which is of course for those who are in the situation and not for you or i.

I saw no signs of a god loving (or fearing depending on your religion) person in your posts, i just saw somone who could not accept anothers viewpoint.

Maybe you should read back what you and other people wrote to the people i named.

stargazer59

nickyhutch wrote: »

Thank you.

The last bit about dating sites - how true! I was on a few "socialising" rather than true dating sites, and my word, a huge proportion of the men on there were married or coupled-up, and more than keen for a meet up. Same goes for a night out - the number of married/coupled men trying it on is amazing. People who haven't been there haven't really got a clue.

Sadly i think the internet, though it is a wonderful thing and a boon to people like me, has made it so easy to cheat, and sadly many are taking advantage of it.

I do worry about people who become so complacent they KNOW it wouldnt happen to them, they would have their world rocked if it happened. I see myself as a realist, i know things happen, i dont demonise people for being human.

gratefulforhelp_2

stargazer59 wrote: »

In just your posts to me you are so superior!

I don't think so, but thanks!

Whether you worry about the effects of adultery or not does not give you the right to be judgmental of others.

People have posted about their relationships with married men/women on an open forum.

That gives me the right to comment, and yes I do judge that behaviour to be wrong.
The OP has been open enough to comment from others, in fact she has, as you or someone has commented, been very calm and dignified about all the posts.

What you see as people being glib i see as them being honest and open, then we will agree to disagree.

also they listened and responded calmly and politely.

If you imply here that I have been rude, please point me to that post.

As for the "cuckolded" ( what a quaint old fashioned term thankyou!) wife and children, is it your place to speak on their behalf? do you not have a life of your own to live?

Do you not have a life of your own to live? Or are only people who agree with you allowed to post on MSE?

When i called you unforgiving i meant your whole attitude, not the literal act of forgiveness which is of course for those who are in the situation and not for you or i.

You can comment on my attitude to adultery, but what evidence do you have about my attitude to other things?

In the same way that I can't tell whether or not the OP is kind to animals/gives to charity/insert whatever you perceive as virtue here..just from her posts on this thread, you have no evidence about my attitude to other things (unless you've been stalking me:eek:)

I saw no signs of a god loving (or fearing depending on your religion) person in your posts, i just saw somone who could not accept anothers viewpoint.

I'm arguing, it's an open forum, that's one of the things that happens here.

Maybe you should read back what you and other people wrote to the people i named.

You're holding me responsible for other people's posts????

neverdespairgirl

stargazer59 wrote: »

Is it a tenet of Christianity to be so unforgiving to others?

I am sure your god and his son said something different?

I'm agnostic, but to get forgiveness, you have to repent.

nickyhutch

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

I'm agnostic, but to get forgiveness, you have to repent.

Those of us you're criticising aren't asking for forgiveness, just to have their opinion heard without the virtual lynching.

stargazer59

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

You're holding me responsible for other people's posts????

I wasnt going to bother to reply as i didnt see the point but here goes.
The Op asked "Can an affair have a happy ending" I dont see anywhere where she asked or wanted your judgement on her behaviour. No one has the RIGHT to comment on someones behaviour.

You see comments that dont agree with yours as glib, i see them as open and honest, you see, my world is full of colour not black and white as yours is.

Unlike you i did not imply anything, but as you asked i clicked onto 3 random pages and yes you were very rude in posts 1188, 1191, and then you were very rude to Nicky on post 1251.

Yes i do have a life of my own to live, as you can tell from my post count,dont know why you reiterated my question to you as it is not me who is busy imposing their own morality onto someone else.

You have asked more than once on here if only people who agree are allowed to post on here, no one has even mentioned that except you.

Nope not stalking you, i hate to tell you this but i have never even noticed your posts until today!

I am commenting on your attitudes to the morality of others, your ability to know what others are thinking, your superiority complex thats all!

Whether the OP is a good person or not is not the issue, you make it one, she asked if there could be a happy ending, no more no less.

Yes you are arguing, but i dont see why? She asked a question,people answered.

Some of us dont need to be judgemental of others or question their morals, we are happy in our own lives and have no of need help to make us a better person.

neverdespairgirl

stargazer59 wrote: »

I have never had an affair, but i dont judge others for what they do in life, who am i to do that? no one is perfect, we do things in life we may regret later, we may not.

So however a person behaves, however bad his behaviour, you never make a judgment about anyone under any circumstances?

cheepskate_2

nickyhutch wrote: »

just to have their opinion heard .

Maybe you should be so brave, as to go to the unsuspecting wife's, when your having the affair, and give her your opinion, on cross over relationships

stargazer59

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

I'm agnostic, but to get forgiveness, you have to repent.

I dont remember anyone asking for forgiveness on here?

Who are they to offer it?

stargazer59

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

So however a person behaves, however bad his behaviour, you never make a judgment about anyone under any circumstances?

Who am i to judge?

Am i perfect myself?

I do not judge peoples morals or how they live their life.

I have my opinions on their behaviour but it is not my right to voice them to appear superior