Daughter is pregnant - at 15!

peachyprice

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

The girl already knows - it the mum who does not have this information.

Yes, I know that. But the mum cannot give her the best possible advice as to what life will be like whatever decision the girl makes without knowing who the father is.

Say the boy was a traveller working on the fairground (sorry, cliche I know) and the girl doesn't even know his name, in these circumstances whatever decision the girl makes will only effect her.

Say the boy is her BF's brother, the decision the girl makes may cause alot of repercussions for many years to come for alot of people.

Without knowing the full story how on earth can her mum give her advice about how each option she has at the moment may work out?

POPPYOSCAR

peachyprice wrote: »

Yes, I know that. But the mum cannot give her the best possible advice as to what life will be like whatever decision the girl makes without knowing who the father is.

Say the boy was a traveller working on the fairground (sorry, cliche I know) and the girl doesn't even know his name, in these circumstances whatever decision the girl makes will only effect her.

Say the boy is her BF's brother, the decision the girl makes may cause alot of repercussions for many years to come for alot of people.

Without knowing the full story how on earth can her mum give her advice about how each option she has at the moment may work out?

I do see what you are saying to a degree but I personally think that the important one here is the girl who is pregnant and not any possible repercussions on anyone else.IMO it should be what is best for her and no one else.

If she just will not say then I don't see how it can be forced out of her and this should not delay the decision being made but my main point is that it has only been a few days and I think this will all come out very shortly anyway.

savingmummy

Rikki wrote: »

Some have mentioned the doctor not sending her for a scan and the OP's daughter being 14 weeks pregnant. I don't think the doctor would send her for a scan or any other pregnancy type appointments until a decision has been made. I wouldn't like my daughter to see a scan of a baby she may decide it's best to abort.

Talking is the best step for now but a decision has to come quick.

A scan is done whether the pregnancy is being terminated or not in our clinic.
AND the screen isnt shown if it is for the professionals purposes.

Your quite right though their may be a valid reason why a scan hasn`t been arranged. BUT s/he should of at least arranged for her to be medically checked as in this situation normally they are quite thorough.

anderson8

have i missed something?
i thought the OP had said scans, appointments etc had been arranged/discussed.

read this thread from page one and just wanted to say OP that you can have so many people telling you what they think the right thing to do is, but at the end of the day she's your daughter and you know her best. its your prerogative as her mother to do what your think is right.

Welshdebtor

anderson8 wrote: »

have i missed something?
i thought the OP had said scans, appointments etc had been arranged/discussed.

read this thread from page one and just wanted to say OP that you can have so many people telling you what they think the right thing to do is, but at the end of the day she's your daughter and you know her best. its your prerogative as her mother to do what your think is right.

Correct she did

savingmummy

anderson8 wrote: »

have i missed something?
i thought the OP had said scans, appointments etc had been arranged/discussed.

read this thread from page one and just wanted to say OP that you can have so many people telling you what they think the right thing to do is, but at the end of the day she's your daughter and you know her best. its your prerogative as her mother to do what your think is right.

post 1000! I missed that.

Most GP`s just refer for this to be done so i`m suprised shes/his arranged it already.

Torry_Quine

Rikki wrote: »

Some have mentioned the doctor not sending her for a scan and the OP's daughter being 14 weeks pregnant. I don't think the doctor would send her for a scan or any other pregnancy type appointments until a decision has been made. I wouldn't like my daughter to see a scan of a baby she may decide it's best to abort.

Talking is the best step for now but a decision has to come quick.

if she is planning to terminate the screen would be turned away.

looby75 wrote: »

AFAIK you HAVE to have a scan before you can have a termination to make sure you aren't further on than you think.

You don't have to see the screen but you DO have to have the scan.

You don't have to have a scan before a termination if the pregnancy is early enough and dates are certain. If there is any doubt as in this case I would think a scan would be needed.

Oldernotwiser

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

But a lot of people do not move on from those things Lunar listed. A lot of drug addicts are addicts for life and a lot of people who suffer from depression have it with them for life.

I would rather my daughter came home and told me she was pregnant than that she was a heroin addict.

Would you? Well, we're all different I suppose.

Plans_all_plans

ONW, I do not know anyone who'd prefer their 15 year old to be a smackhead over being pregnant! That's outrageous!

Oldernotwiser

poet123 wrote: »

I work in a college in the same room as the SLO (Student Liaison Officer) and he keeps a box of condoms under his desk and 16 year olds regularly pop in for one.....funny though, without exception, they all ask for large!!

That's exactly the same for me when I used to be based in the college's Student Services, I don't know about size but they all certainly ask for more than one!