Daughter is pregnant - at 15!

KiKi

Seriously, DON79, stop responding! It only encourages posting. Ignorance and reporting works far better.

DON79

KiKi wrote: »

Seriously, DON79, stop responding! It only encourages posting. Ignorance and reporting works far better.

I know, lol! just so funny... sorry! hee hee!

ifonlyitwaseasier

dehaan wrote: »

Some idiot banned me for "language" but I haven't used any offensive language so it was clearly a mistake. Why should I change my name completely, I have nothing to hide.

wow, calling admin "idiot" and then admitting you are a PPR'd EX user

post reported

cprtknight4

Op, best advice I can give you is like others have said be there for
your daughter, tell her you wil support her no matter what xx

I was just 17 when I fell pregnant, my mum said she was'nt pleased nor happy with me. But would be there for me as support no matter what decision I made. My head was all over the place, so to be 15 and pregnant, your daughter must be feeling rather frightened. I went through with the pregnancy and have now got 2 children, been with my partner for 9 years and married for the last 7 years, so there are happy endings not all are bad.

All the best to yourself, your daughter and family xx

leos-mummy

To the OP... you sound like a lovely caring mum and Im sure your daughter thinks this too otherwise she wouldnt have told you she was pregnant. My mum guessed about my pregnancy and I got her to tell my dad lol... Fast forward 2 years and my son is the pride and joy of the family
Try and stay calm and keep your daughter calm too... remember she is pregnant and stress could have a negative effect on her and the baby.
Ultimately the decisions that have to made can only be done by her but she'll need your support every step of the way. As long as the sex was consential then I wouldn't involve the police IMO but its your decision.
I know it will be very hard but try and get some sleep tonight so your feeling fresh for when your daughter comes home in the morning and hopefully shes ready to talk things through, she may need more time to gather her own thoughts and feelings about the situation.
All the best and keep us updated

PS Im assuming the negative comments from dave and dehaani were removed? Read the entire thread and saw people were complaining about it but couldn't see the posts in question. It doesn't matter what age you have a child, as long as you love and care for them thats all that matters IMO

LittleMissMPB

I can't really offer much more support than already has been, so just wishing you and your daughter the best of luck.

I was older when I fell pregnant - I was 19. I was scared, and did something very similar to your daughter. I took a couple of tests that were positive, told the father, then went to the dr's and had it confirmed, later that same day I told my mum. I had arranged to stay out that night - still lived at home and it was more of a 'casual' relationship. I decided to keep the baby. The conversation with my mum went something like this:

"Mum, I'm pregnant"
"umm.. ok... *silence for a few mins* ... does **** (father) know?"
"yes"
"do you know what you want to do?"
"we've decided to keep it"
"ok, I need a drink"
followed by the "I'm too young to be a grandma" conversations (she was 42)

it was actually my grandparents who were worse... the first thing my gran said when I told her was "oh no... " and a lot of disappointment. However, guess who now spoils and dotes on my children the most? That same gran who wished I wasn't pregnant. I realise this bit isn't relevant to you, but the 'little' comments can say the most, when I heard that "oh no" I had that feeling in my gut of just wanting to cry and feeling like I'd let everyone down.

Blue_Elephant

Hey *hugs* I think you might need them as much as your daughter. I also have a story to share.

One of my best friends got pregnant when we were all 14 (her boyfriend too). She'd been seeing this guy for 6 months at the time and had an accident. I convinced her to tell her mum, using the argument that it was going to come out at some point, she couldn't hide it forever. Her mother's response was "Have an abortion or get out of my house".

Her boyfriend also went home and braved telling his parents too. They hit the roof. In a moment of clarity his dad asked what her parents had said, and hit the roof all over again when he heard her mother's reaction.

Long story short, his parents took them in, he stayed at school and got himself an apprenticeship. She left to look after the baby, then when baby went to nursery and with the help of the "in laws" she went back, did her GCSEs, A-levels and is halfway through an open uni degree. They moved out as soon as they could afford to. Oh and they got married about a month ago.

You don't sound anything like her mother, and your daughter will be grateful for that. But it goes to show that it can and does work out. Ignore the idiots, not entirely sure what the guy who would disown his daughter thinks that would achieve. A baby/=a lifetime on benefits. As for the more obvious troll, if they PM you anything offensive PLEASE report them.

One thing I did learn from my friends "in laws". They never tried to take over. They didn't try to help too much, even when things were hard. This was their baby and they needed to learn how to bring up their child, even though they were kids themselves. They weren't just bailed out and were responsible, sensible and hard working teenagers, like your daughter sounds like she is, whose hormones got the better of them and the precautions they were taking didn't work.

Their son is now 13 years old, almost the age they were when my friend got pregnant. He *knows* how tough they've had it. He is also one of the most loving, caring and considerate teenagers I've ever met. He's a credit to his parents, and again goes to show the stereotype is bullsh*t.

Love and hugs to you both. I hope it all works out.

make_me_wise

Its really good that she has told you. Some teens feel unable to tell their parents and try to face it all on there own. I think everything you are feeling is completely normal. You may experience alot of different emotions in the next few days as this news settles in.

My advice is to stay calm and be as supportive to your daughter as you can. That is what she will need.

Blue_Elephant

inahead wrote: »

Hiya.

I recommend you try for the abortion. Good luck!

Why? On what basis? Surely the decision that's best for the OP's daughter and grandchild is best decided by her and her family?

Torry_Quine

inahead wrote: »

Hiya.

....... Good luck!

You aren't being helpful.