His parents don't know there is a baby :O

bigzippy

Don't know if this has been broached yet, I skipped a few pages, but what are you going to put on your child's birth certificate under the father bit? It may well be relevant for any future child maintenance claims and whethrr your child easily tracks his biological father down in the future...etc etc...

Mojisola

bigzippy wrote: »

Don't know if this has been broached yet, I skipped a few pages, but what are you going to put on your child's birth certificate under the father bit? It may well be relevant for any future child maintenance claims and whethrr your child easily tracks his biological father down in the future...etc etc...

It makes no difference to child maintenance. If the father disputes paternity, he can take a dna test. If he refuses, it will be assumed that he is the father.

building_with_lego

As they're not married they would both have to attend the registration to have his name on the certificate.

newcook

To be honest, I don’t think you have any right to tell his family – that is up to him to do.

It reads to me that you were together for a very short while (some would even say not long enough to merit the title ‘relationship’), you have decided to keep the baby but want him to have nothing to do with it, he doesn’t want anything to do with it – you are both singing from the same hymn sheet!!



I think this sort of situation is a great example of why both parties should use contraception or at least wait a while to see how they feel before jumping into the sack together!

abby1234519

newcook wrote: »

I think this sort of situation is a great example of why both parties should use contraception or at least wait a while to see how they feel before jumping into the sack together!

What can I say, I was a typical student.

Anyway bit of an update. It appears I cannot find any of his family on Facebook even if I wanted to.

Today I had a text from him asking how I was etc. I casually mentioned financially it was a struggle what with babies being expensive things to cater for and I had an offer of £50 per week for a month?!! Yet he then states he still doesn't feel any different or want to be involved. So I have no idea if I should accept this

Then my boyfriends mother appears to have accepted me after a good 6 months and wants to meet the baby when hes born which apparently is a good thing as for months shes been saying she is fond of me but what a shame I am pregnant. So now I feel that I am being accepted and I don't want HIM mucking this up.

My mum doesn't think I should accept this £200

marywooyeah

I'd take the money - if you turned it down then asked for money in the future he could throw back in your face that he offered it before and you didnt take it, and besides like you say it's expensive - who wouldnt want an extra £200 in your situation? with him being a student too thats probably a stretch for him too.
Its good that your bf's mum is accepting of you, tbh once the baby comes and every is cooing all over him I think that people tend to soften and everything seems to work out.
how much longer have you got left? i seem to remember you being due in july? have you had any uni results back yet either?

x

Jinx

Take the money, its to help provide for your baby..... how can you not?

abby1234519

marywooyeah wrote: »

I'd take the money - if you turned it down then asked for money in the future he could throw back in your face that he offered it before and you didnt take it, and besides like you say it's expensive - who wouldnt want an extra £200 in your situation? with him being a student too thats probably a stretch for him too.
Its good that your bf's mum is accepting of you, tbh once the baby comes and every is cooing all over him I think that people tend to soften and everything seems to work out.
how much longer have you got left? i seem to remember you being due in july? have you had any uni results back yet either?

x

I've had most of this years results back, still waiting for one result back. I had to resubmit an essay due to a plaigerism accusation which in fairness, I did plaigerise I just hadn't realised I had done it. So not intentionally but there was a large portion on one page of my essay that when I looked at the source they were comparing it to I went yes I have I can tell! So all I had to do was fix the referencing and hand it in again. Still had to have a scary meeting. So the unfair practice board have met and I shall find out this week what the result for the essay is. So if my mark was 69 it all hinges on what they decide to cap my mark at. But I'll pass the year even if they fail me. I've done rather well considering I've been pregnant, and had lovely painful SPD preventing me from getting in to university a lot. My average is 69 which is one mark of a first. I screamed in shock to find out I had scored 70 on an exam, I'm the only person to have gotten a first in the exam in the entire year. I'm not bragging....ok I am.

Well I am 38 weeks pregnant this coming tuesday so 2 weeks. Although I suspect I will be late as everyone says the first baby is always late. Despite the SPD I am pretty mobile, I don't feel as pregnant as I should.

It did make me hopeful when the OH said his mum wants to meet the baby etc. I've tried really hard to be pessimistic about our relationship in the sense that I know I'd crumble if he split up with me! Don't see that happening, we've not had our first argument and its been nearly 6 months...so that must be good

I will accept the £200, I know a lot of peoples view is that he should pay continuous maintenance and this is probably a payment from him to be nice as if to say dont ask for maintenance because I'm being nice! So might as well. Even if I don't spend it and find I don't need it I can always put it in an isa for the baby or something like that.

Plans_all_plans

Definitely take the money. If you take it and text him saying "thanks for the money, it came in so handy and we've bought a lovely cot with it, if you want to come see it sometime please do" Something like that. It may make him feel good to know you've bought something nice for the baby and might spur him on to wanting to give you ongoing maintenance. I wonder why on Earth you'd even think of refusing the money?!

I'd be wary of pinning to many of your hopes on the current boyfriend and his family too. Once the baby comes it may be all too much for someone who's not the father to cope with, particularly if he's a typical student himself. Once the baby comes, you'll not be available for going out etc and you might find it's (understandably) all a bit too much, so please do hope for the best, but you'd be wise to prepare for the worst in regard to your current relationship.

pigpen

Heck yes take the money.. he doesn't HAVE to pay anything until the baby is here and as you say you are struggling.. £200 could be a whole wardrobe or a pushchair or a car seat or a cot!!!