Heartbroken!

eyeinthesky

As a man, I find it obscene that your OH thinks more of booze than he does of you and your child. You made this child together and share responsibility for raising a child. There are no if's or but's, this is a joint responsibility that you both share. If he is only working part time then he cannot possibly afford to drink, nor may I add can you!

I am an old fogey, but I have learned a thing or two in my many years. I used to love to go out and get wasted, but I quickly learned that I had responsibilities that would not allow that. Having made the decision that I would not get drunk any more, I found that I could still enjoy a night out, but only having a couple of beers, then switching to soft drinks. I do have a drink at home most evenings, but only a couple of glasses of red wine, which I really enjoy. I also feel pretty good when I see other people getting drunk, and know that I am not being so silly.

So, you have a child to look after. Do you really need another child who happens to be 32 years old? Tell your OH he needs to grow up, and grow a pair, otherwise he needs to find another "mummy" to look after him. Do not let this situation continue, because it will not get any better, not for you, nor for your child. Time now for both of you to grow up I think.

leos-mummy

i dont willingly give him the rent money. some of its his wages too... like i said he would just borrow it elsewhere and would have to be paid back out of our money anyway. i know he shouldnt go out if we dont have the money but i spend money i dont have either, it would make things worse if i was to stop giving him money and i kno thats hard to believe, i dont want him getting a kickin because he owes money, i do love him (i think)

emsywoo123

leos-mummy wrote: »

i dont willingly give him the rent money. some of its his wages too... like i said he would just borrow it elsewhere and would have to be paid back out of our money anyway. i know he shouldnt go out if we dont have the money but i spend money i dont have either, it would make things worse if i was to stop giving him money and i kno thats hard to believe, i dont want him getting a kickin because he owes money, i do love him (i think)

:exclamati wake up. please.

izzybusy23

I cant believe this is on page 10! The OP isn't going to listen; she's in denial that her OH has a drink problem and obviously cares more about keeping him in her life than a roof over her child's head. It's pathetic. Great role model for her son.

balletshoes

sadly I think thats true, OP you are completely in denial about your OH's drinking problem, and how you are enabling his behaviour. Good luck with it all.

emsywoo123

izzybusy23 wrote: »

I cant believe this is on page 10! The OP isn't going to listen; she's in denial that her OH has a drink problem and obviously cares more about keeping him in her life than a roof over her child's head. It's pathetic. Great role model for her son.

It is our natural desire to help, and for some of us, to save her going through what we did, although deep down I think we know she is going to anyway

leos-mummy

I care for my son, he has a roof over his head and always will, hes more important than my partner and he knows that. I just want OH to change his behaviour

emsywoo123

leos-mummy wrote: »

II just want OH to change his behaviour

He won't. If he was going to he would have done by now.

izzybusy23

leos-mummy wrote: »

I care for my son, he has a roof over his head and always will, hes more important than my partner and he knows that. I just want OH to change his behaviour

That ain't going to happen. Wake up before it's too late. Your son may have a roof over his head tonight, but only a couple of posts earlier you said you are already late with your rent because your OH prefers alcohol. The first most important thing is shelter, then food then bills. You and your OH have most certainly got your priorities wrong; him for pi.ssing money up the wall and you for enabling him to do so.

DDpimp

leos-mummy wrote: »

So last night my OH went out with male friends. He never answered his phone all night nor replied to any texts. He only returned home at 5.30am and I discover that the ex he was 'sexting' 2 years ago has been in contact with him...
Advice please?!!

In my oppinon unless this is the one true love of your life...Dump him, not to will only weaken yourself in his and your own eye's.If this individual is your one true love then you should fight to the bitter end.