lazy husband

red_devil

p_joker wrote: »

my dad was in the navy so I have come from a clean and tidy house so was a bit of a shock when I moved in with hubby, my dad did all the ironing too ;-)

my oh did some terms at boarding school where you had to be tidy and organised.

he has a really good work ethic never puts anything off just gets on and never moans.The most unlazy person i have known.

jinky67

My OH is a neat freak, but wouldnt think of lifting a finger to tidy up, thats womans work you see:rotfl:

just as well we dont currently live together I think

gratefulforhelp_2

The men in the armed forces who were mentioned were trained to be good at chores, and doubtless so are the men who are not in the forces. So also, are the women who are good at chores.

DH's mum took great pride in his inability to do any of these things, well she could afford to, she had a cleaner, a babysitter, a gardener and no job. I had to teach him, and he is very willing and not at all lazy...once he knows what needs done and how to do it.

OP if, on a Wednesday, you find yourself cleaning and hating it, while the children are being cared for elsewhere, or alternatively your DH is at home and does nothing, then why not get rid of that day's childcare, save the money, and hire a cleaner?

Not sure why that's a problem?

bargainbetty

wongstack wrote: »

Men hate cleaing because when we actually do tidy stuff up our wives moan that we haven't done it propperly. Imagine tidying the whole house and then being asked why you haven't tidied the house as agreed.

My point is men like mess, we love it.

Think about it, does your man ever nag you to do stuff? No, he does it himself. If a man wants something doing he does it himself, he does not nag his wife to do it.

I hope that's all tongue in cheek.... just in case, simple answers.

Do it when you say you will and do it right, then we'll have nothing to nag about. If you know you haven't done it right, why are you surprised when we comment? And all this 'praise what he has done, not comment on what he hasn't done' - Are you five years old?

Men like mess, do they? Fine, go live in your own filth. If you want to live with women, grow up and start behaving like an adult.

Women do get nagged. Men ask us what's for dinner, where their clean socks are, where did they leave their book/remote/keys etc, why hasn't their 'good' shirt been picked up from the cleaners, why isn't there any beer/OJ in the fridge or snacks in the cupboard? Because you aren't children and you need to take care of yourselves.

My XH and I did our own laundry. He cleaned the kitchen, I did the bathroom, I did the cooking, he did the washing up. We took turns hoovering and if his stuff got lost he knew better than to whine, because my stock response was 'Did you put it away properly?'

I expect a man to be capable of respecting property and taking care of his own. Since I can change oil and tyres, rewire electrical sockets and handle basic plumbing, that old 'womans work' chestnut really doesn't work for me. Quote from Blackadder 3 - Amy and Amiability

'I want a man who can sew on a button. I want a man who knows where the towels are kept.'

londoner1998

bargainbetty wrote: »

I hope that's all tongue in cheek.... just in case, simple answers.

Do it when you say you will and do it right, then we'll have nothing to nag about. If you know you haven't done it right, why are you surprised when we comment? And all this 'praise what he has done, not comment on what he hasn't done' - Are you five years old?

Men like mess, do they? Fine, go live in your own filth. If you want to live with women, grow up and start behaving like an adult.

Women do get nagged. Men ask us what's for dinner, where their clean socks are, where did they leave their book/remote/keys etc, why hasn't their 'good' shirt been picked up from the cleaners, why isn't there any beer/OJ in the fridge or snacks in the cupboard? Because you aren't children and you need to take care of yourselves.

My XH and I did our own laundry. He cleaned the kitchen, I did the bathroom, I did the cooking, he did the washing up. We took turns hoovering and if his stuff got lost he knew better than to whine, because my stock response was 'Did you put it away properly?'

I expect a man to be capable of respecting property and taking care of his own. Since I can change oil and tyres, rewire electrical sockets and handle basic plumbing, that old 'womans work' chestnut really doesn't work for me. Quote from Blackadder 3 - Amy and Amiability

'I want a man who can sew on a button. I want a man who knows where the towels are kept.'

I subscribe to each and every single word in this post... no excuses.
And to the 'but I have been working all day' stock response I get when I ask OH to help, I reply; 'so have I'

pupsicola

Wickedkitten wrote: »

Some mothers may well enjoy it, but when they raise a man to expect a woman to do everything for him because she does, you're going to end up creating a problem, and that goes for raising rdaughters as well.

You do your children no favours by doing everything for them.

I married a right mummys boy who could do nothing for himself. Thanks to his mother never teaching him.

My sons are already learning to be self sufficient at 8 and 5 years old. They get up and make their beds, get themselves dressed, can make their own breakfast, tidy things away after themselves. As they grow older they will gradually be given more and more responsibility. In their teens they can load the washing machine, help me unload it and hang it round the radiators properly. Then they can learn to iron. My eldest already likes cooking. One day their future wives/girlfriends will thank me. No way are they turning out like their dad.

KxMx

TV adverts have some blame too- they constantly show Mum serving food to hubby and children (often grown) at table!!

pigpen

KxMx wrote: »

TV adverts have some blame too- they constantly show Mum serving food to hubby and children (often grown) at table!!

I curtsied to OH last night as I handed him his dinner and said I felt like the maid... lol...

It isn't happening tonight!

Charlie1978

Ours is probably a strange arrangement.

Basically Monday - Friday I pretty much sort out mine and the kids dinners. I do the packed lunches and sort them out throughout the week. I dropped hours at work recently down to 5 a day being 7.5 months pregnant. Hubby however does the majority of the work at the weekend. He does all the washing and sorts the kids their dinners out etc. If I want a take away he'll happily get one. I must admit sometimes during the week I do feel so tired that even cooking beans on toast is hard work. But the option of the take away is there which I don't take up too often but it's nice to know that it is.

I appreciate being given a break at the weekend and he (I think lol) appreciates being able to come home and sit down for a while after a long day at work. Kids are in bed at 7.30pm so all is well in our household. I don't feel like i'm doing everything and we both get a break at certain times.

With baby on the way this will likely change but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Communication is key and he's pretty fantastic with babies anyhow so as long as we keep communication channels open I don't envisage any problems

wongstack

bargainbetty wrote: »

I hope that's all tongue in cheek.... just in case, simple answers.

Do it when you say you will and do it right, then we'll have nothing to nag about. If you know you haven't done it right, why are you surprised when we comment? And all this 'praise what he has done, not comment on what he hasn't done' - Are you five years old?

Women do get nagged. Men ask us what's for dinner, where their clean socks are, where did they leave their book/remote/keys etc, why hasn't their 'good' shirt been picked up from the cleaners, why isn't there any beer/OJ

'I want a man who can sew on a button. I want a man who knows where the towels are kept.'

Ooookay

First off it sounds like you want a maid and not a husband

Husbands are not domestic helpers to do whatever the wife commands

Secondly men don't leave mess for women, we don't even see the mess, the mess has an importance rating of 0/100

Mess is as important to men as power tools are to women

And yes I am 5, today in fact

I met my wife when I was minus2, we have a rota system where i do one week of emptying the dishwasher etc and she does the second week

It's easy

Nagging a man will only push him away, it's actually one of the leading causes of divorce above infidelity