lazy husband

londoner1998

I agree with you Pigpen- it if more often tha no t not appreciated- I do most of the cooking - I am fast, I don't make mess and know how to economise, plus I cook my native Basque food that OH loves so much... but it gets too much to do it all all the time- we had a friend staying with us last week and he commented how exhausted I looked when I picked him up at the airport- of course, I was out the previous night on a work event and the got up early to study... following with a complete blitz of the kitchen and bathroom... OH did the hoovering (his task) during the weekend, but the heavy work fell on me and I don't think he has even cleaned the toilet bowl...

Gavin83

Kimberley82 wrote: »

Brilliant idea

I thought you were of the opinion of joint money in a relationship anyway, so how can it come out of his?

Anyway seeing as you both work the same hours you should be doing an equal split of the housework, or hire someone to help out if it's too much trouble. I think the idea of sitting down and discussing who does what jobs is a good idea. Write up a rota if necessary but make it clear that this arrangement won't continue.

LillythePink

I work FT and extra hours frequently, I am also studying and do the running around for my dd

My OH, comes in from work and plonks himself in front of the pc and doesn't move - I do the washing/ironing/cleaning/cooking/dishwasher etc etc etc

yes, he services the cars or tinkers with the motorbike apart from that...F all!

I will go on strike and not do anything apart from cook and iron what I and dd need to wear - eventually, OH moans that the house is messy and that WE must do some cleaning at the weekend - then oh...it's nice weather - I'm going out on the bike/diving/out with camera and then thinks that him cleaning the bathroom is cleaning the house!

we used to share the cooking - deal was him cook, me clean up and visa versa.......now it's me cook, me clean up if he does cook, he still expects me to clean up after him as "you moaned when you didn't have a dishwasher, now you have one - you load it!"

I blame his mum - she did everything for him, he's never lived on his own and always had someone doing it all for him - I am just the next mug in line! I remind him that I am not his mother - in one ear and out the other!

then he moans when I am too tired for some jiggy!

wongstack

All the man bashing!!! very sexist I must say

Men hate cleaing because when we actually do tidy stuff up our wives moan that we haven't done it propperly. Imagine tidying the whole house and then being asked why you haven't tidied the house as agreed.

We are fragile creatures, your naggs are like daggers!

My mrs used to do 48 hour shifts. The house would magically go from neat and tidy to being littered with beer cans, used tissues and empty pizza boxes.

5 mins before she came home after her shift I would have a mad tidying session picking up all the dirty boxer shorts etc.

My point is men like mess, we love it. I want my dirty boxer shorts on the floor, I want egg stains on my dressing gown, I like collecting half empty cups of tea to see what mouldy creatures I can grow in the cups. I enjoy the smell of wet towels and 3 day old t shirts.

I think it's high time women stopped nagging men about cleaning. Would you like us to nag you about being too tidy?

Think about it, does your man ever nag you to do stuff? No, he does it himself. If a man wants something doing he does it himself, he does not nag his wife to do it.

It's a crazy logic you women have, you want something done so you nag your husband to do it? If it only takes a few minutes just do it yourself, then why not just do it yourself. You wont be happy with the way your husband does it anyway.

Wickedkitten

Gloomendoom wrote: »

Muggins? Some mothers enjoy it.

My mother is one such person. When she visits, we have to practically tie her to the sofa to stop her tidying, cooking, washing, cleaning, ironing, dressmaking, decorating etc.

Some mothers may well enjoy it, but when they raise a man to expect a woman to do everything for him because she does, you're going to end up creating a problem, and that goes for raising rdaughters as well.

You do your children no favours by doing everything for them.

Mojisola

All these lazy men must have some other exceptional qualities for you all to put up with them!

Gavin83

wongstack wrote: »

All the man bashing!!! very sexist I must say

Men hate cleaing because when we actually do tidy stuff up our wives moan that we haven't done it propperly. Imagine tidying the whole house and then being asked why you haven't tidied the house as agreed.

We are fragile creatures, your naggs are like daggers!

My mrs used to do 48 hour shifts. The house would magically go from neat and tidy to being littered with beer cans, used tissues and empty pizza boxes.

5 mins before she came home after her shift I would have a mad tidying session picking up all the dirty boxer shorts etc.

My point is men like mess, we love it. I want my dirty boxer shorts on the floor, I want egg stains on my dressing gown, I like collecting half empty cups of tea to see what mouldy creatures I can grow in the cups. I enjoy the smell of wet towels and 3 day old t shirts.

I think it's high time women stopped nagging men about cleaning. Would you like us to nag you about being too tidy?

Think about it, does your man ever nag you to do stuff? No, he does it himself. If a man wants something doing he does it himself, he does not nag his wife to do it.

It's a crazy logic you women have, you want something done so you nag your husband to do it? If it only takes a few minutes just do it yourself, then why not just do it yourself. You wont be happy with the way your husband does it anyway.

Awesome post and I actually think there is a lot of truth in it. Men can cope with a lot more mess than women before they feel the need to clean up and I think thats half the problem. What looks clean to a guy might look dirty to his mrs. Your husbands will eventually clean up, it's just a case of waiting until they reach their 'too messy' point. Problem is, most women aren't willing to. Often my girlfriend does some cleaning when I really don't feel it needs doing.

I think your also right about the nagging. I never ask my girlfriend to do anything, if I want something doing I'll do it myself.

Flyboy152

Fang wrote: »

Hire a cleaner and take their wages from his.

What I have difficulty understanding, even in these days, partners still keep their income and expenditure separate; "his wages pay for the bills and mine pays for the rent." Maybe this is the reason why there is so much disparity in relationships.

Gavin83

Flyboy152 wrote: »

What I have difficulty understanding, even in these days, partners still keep their income and expenditure separate; "his wages pay for the bills and mine pays for the rent." Maybe this is the reason why there is so much disparity in relationships.

One thing I've never understood about pooled finances. If one partner wants something that the other doesn't (say for a hobby or something similar) how do they go about it? Do they ask permission from the other partner first, just go ahead any buy it or not buy it at all, as all money should only be spent of items for both partners?

Spendless

Either use a technique used in selling,where instead of an open question that can be answered 'yes/no'. You say Do you want to wash the pots or make the beds? You then do the job they don't choose- think about it though!!! Don't say "Do you want to clean the oven or take Billy to football practice?"

Alternatively tell them a clean tidy bedroom/house/put away laundry really really turns you on.