Stripper Opinions - but fear I may regret it.

janninew

Tropez wrote: »

But what about in the case that I mentioned earlier where it was my partner herself who took me to a strip club, and even paid for a dance? Is that low self-esteem on her part?

Its horses for courses though! The OP on this thread doesn't like her husband watching strippers, your OH doesn't mind. There is no right or wrong, as long as both partners are happy people should do what they want in relationships, use pornography, watch strippers, threesomes etc. As long as both partners feel respected there is no problem!

RedwoodBrook

janninew wrote: »

I don't like the thought of the man I love being aroused by other women who probably have better bodies.

That very much depends on what your OH finds attractive. Mine, for example, is not a fan of thin women with large breasts (using the stripper stereoptype there).
Fortunate really as my pregnancy last year covered me in stretch marks and gave me a nice layer of fat

Fang_3

Tish_P wrote: »

In answer to your questions Grand Plan:
No, I haven't and wouldn't see male strippers.
Yes, I notice attractive men. I have eyes. So does my partner, and I have no doubt he notices attractive women. The difference, and it's a vast one to my mind, is between noticing attractive people - as people! - and paying them to perform se xually - the latter makes se x into a consumer product (and nearly always a male consumer) rather than a fun thing people do together for pleasure or love or both. A guy who sees strippers and I have fundamentally different ideas about se x and so would be incompatible.

(Let's see how badly the swear filter mangles that)

Sex is not a dirty word.

dmg24

Tish_P wrote: »

In answer to your questions Grand Plan:
No, I haven't and wouldn't see male strippers.
Yes, I notice attractive men. I have eyes. So does my partner, and I have no doubt he notices attractive women. The difference, and it's a vast one to my mind, is between noticing attractive people - as people! - and paying them to perform se xually - the latter makes se x into a consumer product (and nearly always a male consumer) rather than a fun thing people do together for pleasure or love or both. A guy who sees strippers and I have fundamentally different ideas about se x and so would be incompatible.

(Let's see how badly the swear filter mangles that)

Sex is not a swear word!

Torry_Quine

skintchick wrote: »

For what it's worth, if my OH went to strip club it would be a divorcing issue, and he knows it. I don't see ogling other women for sexual titillation as 'harmless' or indeed 'fun' (theussual comment about such activity) and he knows it's a dealbreaker.

I don't think it's controlling to tell your husband/partner that you will be mortally offended and mightily p1ssed off if they go and look at scantily clad women with the intention of getting turned on - for me, that's part of the point of your marriage vows, 'forsaking all others'.

Plans_all_plans wrote: »

It doesn't matter where it was Fang. If those words came out of my husband through the medium of speech, pen or keyboard I would think we were having issues in our relationship and I'd want to get to the bottom of them. It isn't an acceptable way to speak or behave in my opinion and it is not the way I know my husband to be, therefore it'd be a cause for concern.

RedwoodBrook wrote: »

Out of pure interest - Do all the women who dislike strip clubs also dislike pornography?

I for one would be horrified if my husband went to a strip club and yes I am opposed to pornography.

Marriage should be the only place where you see someone in such a revealing way and the human body should not be used for the titillation of random strangers.

janninew

Fang wrote: »

Could you get your husband to share his secret of how he stops himself being aroused by other people? I'm sure there are millions of people who would kill for such an ability given it goes against human nature and instinct. Or perhaps the key is that he just doesn't tell you and instead indulges your whims?

You're being very pedantic. I know my husband doesn't get aroused watching naked women dance around as he doesn't go to strip clubs. He may look at !!!!!! online, I have no problem with this and see it being a completly different kettle of fish to watching a live strip show. He doesn't indulge me whims, he respects me, this is normal in a healthy marriage.

skintchick

dmg24 wrote: »

In what way do you think !!!!!! should be more strictly controlled?

For a start, I think !!!!!! magazines should not be openly and easily available on the high street, I think they should be difficult to get hold of and certainly not on full view to children in newsagents.

I think sex shops, strip clubs and the like should not be allowed to open on high streets and advertise what they do.

I also think there should be tighter controls on what counts as !!!!!! these days - a lot of films have such high levels of explicit sex that I would not be happy with my children watching them, and I'm not happy myself!

THat's just off the top of my head. I know you don;t agree, but then you work in the industry which I would happily see shut down so we aren;t going to agree are we?

Tropez

janninew wrote: »

Its horses for courses though! The OP on this thread doesn't like her husband watching strippers, your OH doesn't mind. There is no right or wrong, as long as both partners are happy people should do what they want in relationships, use pornography, watch strippers, threesomes etc. As long as both partners feel respected there is no problem!

I agree, absolutely and said as much earlier on. That response though wasn't directed at the OP, but rather a remark made about self-esteem which I happened to disagree with.

I can fully accept that if the OP has a problem with strippers then that is a problem for her. The fact that my partner does not has no bearing on how the OP or anybody else will feel on the subject.

Tish_P

It's not that I thought it was swearing! I just thought that the !!!!!!! swear filter on here might. I'm always having to !!!!!footing around it. It is a silly !!! and deserves to be the butt of many jokes.

Fang_3

skintchick wrote: »

For a start, I think !!!!!! magazines should not be openly and easily available on the high street, I think they should be difficult to get hold of and certainly not on full view to children in newsagents.

I think sex shops, strip clubs and the like should not be allowed to open on high streets and advertise what they do.

I also think there should be tighter controls on what counts as !!!!!! these days - a lot of films have such high levels of explicit sex that I would not be happy with my children watching them, and I'm not happy myself!

THat's just off the top of my head. I know you don;t agree, but then you work in the industry which I would happily see shut down so we aren;t going to agree are we?

Why don't you exercise some self control and not watch the films that you find objectionable? There are sufficient guidelines to allow you to filter them out.

As for the rest - the last time I checked all !!!!!! magazines are placed on the top shelf, behind either barriers or plastic covers which hide everything but the masthead.