Nightmare 15 yr old daughter

toozie_2

Thanks Caz, but I'm 99% sure she'd go absolutely MAD. She was/is quite a private person anyway, with a small circle of close friends. I think she'd look at it as tho I've been speaking to strangers behind her back. Although this has helped me a great deal, I don't think it would improve the situation for her to read it.

I'm going to ride the storm, and have taken loads of advice from here, and hope we come out the other end unscathed so to speak!

Thanks anyway Caz.

Caz2_2

Hi toozie
your probably right it could make things worse especially if she is a private person. Just remember don't take it personally, a friend told me this years ago and it really helped she believes that teenagers don't realise the hurt they can inflict on their mums and dads because they are so self absorbed.
good luck and post again if it gets bad

Glad

I made my 13 yr old sit and read it, I thought it may help if we both knew what to expect and that it's not always anyones fault

aliasojo

This should make you feel better toozie.

Guess where I've just been?

I've just come back from an emergency unit where I had to take my 15 year old (you know, the one I mentioned above and said he was getting nicer again? :rolleyes: ) as he was brought home drunk tonight!

Two lads who know him, found him staggering along the High Street (at 9pm) and brought him home. It seems him and another 'mate' were very getting happy on vodka.

He couldn't stand or focus when he came home so I called the NHS helpline a short while later for advice and they reckoned he should be seen at casualty as he had all the symptoms of alchohol poisoning (pale skin, shaking, pain in stomach, constantly sick etc).

By this time though, he was more alert and I didn't think he was that bad tbh so I queried what the alternative was. Shower and caffeine was the answer so that's what I did....threw the little sod into the shower and poured coffee down his throat which he promptly brought back up again.

NHS helpline lady called back 30 minutes later and told me she was really worried and advised me to take him to the nearest emergency clinic to get his blood sugar levels tested.

I took him to the clinic and his levels were fine so the Doc just told him to sleep it off. I was impressed at how efficient the helpline was though, the nurse practitioner was very caring and helpful.

I hope they will be so caring and helpful tomorrow when he'll need more medical help after I've been at him in the morning?!

So there you are toozie....things could be worse.

Savvy_Sue

aliasojo wrote:

Two lads who know him, found him staggering along the High Street (at 9pm) and brought him home. It seems him and another 'mate' were very getting happy on vodka.

<snip>

I hope they will be so caring and helpful tomorrow when he'll need more medical help after I've been at him in the morning?!

Thank goodness for those lads! and LOL at the thought of the morning ...

toozie_2

aliasgo, you've had a scary time. Hopefully he'll feel so ill tomorrow, that he won't do that again for a very long time. Must have been frightening for you, and as Sue said, thankgoodness the lads just didn't leave him in the gutter...

I've actually had a nice night, second daughter was out at trampoline club, then swimming club, so I asked the Teenage Tantrum Queen-quite off handidly- if she'd like to watch a DVD, and have some crisps. She actually said " Yeh great, I'll choose a film, you get the Pringles!"
Mr. T was working late, so we turned all the lights off, and watched a romantic/comedy whilst munching away.

aliasgo, hope your lad has learnt a lesson, I've probably got somthing similar ahead of me. A lot of my friends with older kids went through it when their children were 13/14/15.

My friend Sue, and her husband had gone to a family party in a local hotel with their then 15 year old daughter. By 9.30pm, a relative told Sue to come with her to the toilets. Sue's daughter was paraletic, on the floor, wrapped round the toilet bowl, with the door locked. Sue's husband had to climb over the top of the cubicle to open the door. They got her home, and that night she was sick about 15 times, and the next day was non-existant for her! I don't think she's drunk to that extent again...but she's away at Uni now so.........what the eye can't see.......

aliasojo

Well 15 year olds these days seem to have more stamina than in my day! Son up at 9am showered and dressed and ready to go off to football.

No, don't think so!

You wouldn't believe how fresh he looks given how bad he was last night. (If I'd got that drunk I'd be suffering for days!)

Needless to say words were exchanged and a lengthy grounding was handed out. He tried to play the sympathy hand by saying he felt pressured :rolleyes: , (I laughed at that one as son is more than able to say no to his mates, trust me!!)

When he realised that wasn't going to work, he changed tack and said he just got carried away.

He's supposed to be going to Blackpool on an organised football trip next month (kids teams from all over meet up to play in some league or other). I'm seriously considering withdrawing my permission.

I shall teach him the value of making the correct choice if it kills me!

Good luck to everyone who has a teenager, never mind whether the teenagers make it out the other side....I just hope we do!

toozie_2

Here, Here

iglimpse

You only hurt the ones you love...
You need to talk to as many other parents as you can with similar aged kids. The more you realise everybody else is going through exactly the same thing, the better you will fee when things get really bad.
One of the hardest things I found was to accept that they are very sensible and you have to give them credit for that. You will be amazed how truly sensible they can be

It is sometimes not easy to respect their decisions or views, specially if partner does not agree with the way you decide to handle it, then they start playing you off agianst each other.
It is a normal thing all families go through, whatever the outside appearances look like!!

pandas66

Thanks for the warning of impending trip to Blackpool as thats where I'm at! Son came home the other day with details of a tournement and a night out! Hmmmmmm I think not!