Too young to have my baby?

makesmewannadie

I had a miscarriage at 18 and my first child at 20. I wish you the best of luck.

fireflycatcher

BeenieCat wrote: »

Yeah he's 7 now And it was a good pregnancy and birth.

:beer: That's great!

sharkeybabe

pinknfluffy0 wrote: »

But for how long?
babies are not toys they are a life time commitment and plans need to be in place.

I think that she understands that it is a life long commitment - but I am sorry dont think she needs to start planning this asap. She has another 8 or so months to plan things. I am 8 weeks pregnant in a relationship with a house, bills etc and I havent started planning anything yet. There is plenty of time, She needs to get her head around things first - this is a shock for her afterall.

jimbms

pinknfluffy0 wrote: »

But for how long?
babies are not toys they are a life time commitment and plans need to be in place.

What a load of bull, we never planned anything in advance for our 2, now aged 26 & 24 lads, both very well adjusted, one a teacher one an Engineer, both still scrounging and both very caring and look after their shameful old parents who do everything they can at every oppertunity to disgust them, (oh revenge is sweet), we never even saved for their uni etc, so please tell me how we did it wrong. Children are spontanious and to be loved and enjoyed, they are not a commodity to be organised and planned.

pinknfluffy0

sharkeybabe wrote: »

I think that she understands that it is a life long commitment - but I am sorry dont think she needs to start planning this asap. She has another 8 or so months to plan things. I am 8 weeks pregnant in a relationship with a house, bills etc and I havent started planning anything yet. There is plenty of time, She needs to get her head around things first - this is a shock for her afterall.

She does, that time will go very quickly, I know I have children.

sharkeybabe

I think that is terrible. Just because you have already had children doesnt mean that your way is the right way! read the poster above yours! Doesnt always have to planned down to the T

pinknfluffy0

Your right not everything has to be planned but the basics should be ie like a job and home should be.

margaretclare

pinknfluffy0 wrote: »

You're right - not everything has to be planned but the basics should be ie like a job and home should be.

Absolutely.

Cait, you and the baby will need somewhere to live, and you'll need money.

And please don't give up on your education. Nowadays people have a LOT more opportunities for carrying on their education than used to be possible. A lot more flexibility. The people I know at Brackenhurst College, which I referred to earlier, treat every applicant on his/her own individual merits. The people I admire most (I go there every June to their Presentation Day) are the young people on the Pathways courses, many of whom are Down's syndrome. The sense of achievement they get absolutely shines out of their faces.

Clive_Woody

I've got two little monsters aged 1 and 4, and I am only slightly more than double your age. I love them to bits, they drive me and my wife nuts at times, but the joy they bring is impossible to describe. When I go in to get my little boy in the morning from his cot and I get a huge grin and he starts babbling away my heart just melts. My daughter is off to school in September which still doesn't seem real, at some point it will sink in that I am grown up with kids.

There are hard work and they don't come cheap, you can cut costs here and there but they will need a lot of money to bring up. Love comes free and that's what they want/need most of all.

If you have children you will experience levels of tiredness you never imagined possible, but you cope and just get on with it. The early weeks/months are the hardest for lack of sleep, but the coming years bring new challenges but again you find ways to deal with these new problems. You will have ups and downs, it hurts when your little one says they hate you, but when they come running to you for a cuddle and say sorry they do still love you then it's amazing how quickly your forget.

Before my kids arrived I went to university, travelled around Europe a bit, had a regular job for a few years, played lots of sport, went on holidays with just me and my wife, things that generally are not compatible with having children around (not impossible I hasten to add). That's just how my life has panned out so far.

Good luck for whatever choice you make and never look back and feel guilty, the decision has to be right for you. You get one shot at life.

westcountrymaid_2

My mum had me when she was just 17. My parents got married and had a very happy life for 43 years until my dad passed away. Things were tight but they managed and mum and I are like sisters, we have a brilliant relationship.

My niece had her daughter at 18, she's a single mum, went to College, left home and went to University along with her daughter who went to the nursery at the University, she got a law degree and is now working full time. Yes she had a little help from family but she did most of it herself even though it wasn't always easy. I'm not suggesting that Uni is for everyone but if you want to carry on with your education it can be done.

Good luck Cait, I'm sure things will work out for you.