Do we have a brat camp type boarding school in the UK?

BARGAINHUNTER!

Yeah - I have just read this thread and as I have a teenage son im wondering too!

Tazness

I am wondering what the outcome was of this.
Girl Power I hope all is well.. :A

My partner and I are thinking about setting up a Brat Camp in rural Spain for young people from the UK. We are both Social workers and are concerned about the lack of support and intervention for those young people on the 'verge', those that offend have schemes but we want to help parents before things get too out of hand.
We are looking at land now and will be using outdoor skills, sport, teambuilding, groupwork, life coaching and NLP skills to help. Mixed with some dicipline and strong boundries.... We also plan to work with the parents and siblings.

The idea is only at the begining and I found this thread whislt browsing..
This thread reminded us of why we want to do this .

dad-of-4

i spent a year and a half (ish) in a state aproved "bad lad boarding school", and i wouldnt wish it on anyone, i hated every minuite of everyday, my problems were prety much confined to a hatred of school genraly (truancy mainly). but i found my self in a school with lads who had suffered a lot of abuse, for many going home for school holidays meant going back to the city you came from to a childrens home, for some, they never even got to go anywhere, being forced in their you just get on with it as best you can, but as an adult looking back it seems a lot clearer the type of lads who were their.

tho i get on well with my mum, but I will never ever forgive her for not fighting to keep me out of it and she knows it.

it shocks me to see someone wish this for their kid, you need shooting woman!!!!

Gforce_2

GIRLPOWER wrote: »

He loves football.. but gets kicked off all teams cos he walk off the pitch cos he's been fowled every 5 minutes or he will sit in the middle of the pitch cos no one is passing to him. again Dad got tired of watching him.. he makes you ashamed when your in public with him.

This bit reminds me of my friends son (along with the disruptive behaviour in school), he was eventually diagnosed as having aspergers.

foreign_correspondent

dad-of-4 wrote: »

i spent a year and a half (ish) in a state aproved "bad lad boarding school", and i wouldnt wish it on anyone, i hated every minuite of everyday, my problems were prety much confined to a hatred of school genraly (truancy mainly). but i found my self in a school with lads who had suffered a lot of abuse, for many going home for school holidays meant going back to the city you came from to a childrens home, for some, they never even got to go anywhere, being forced in their you just get on with it as best you can, but as an adult looking back it seems a lot clearer the type of lads who were their.

tho i get on well with my mum, but I will never ever forgive her for not fighting to keep me out of it and she knows it.

it shocks me to see someone wish this for their kid, you need shooting woman!!!!

Whilst I disagree with the shooting bit (!!), I think sending kids away is damaging and problematic for all sorts of reasons, not least the feelings of rejection it creates. Thanks for this post.

GIRLPOWER_2

Just a quick update

My eldest son is 17 next week. my youngest are now 6 and 7. Me and his Dad still remain married in the same house.

After this post we went to see the life coach and he mainly put it down to him not drinking enough water and shouted at him the same things I had been doing for years, so that was the end of that.

He went from never leaving the house and having no friends to never being in and having lots of friends. These friends were not what you would have chosen (always on those mini motor bikes causing problems) but they did not seem to be taking drugs or drinking so it could have been a lot worse.

I tried to keep in with his gang by making them pizza and movie nights, lots of sleep overs etc but DS just used to speak to me like poo and the other lads always looked embarrassed.

He left school without any qualifications as we knew he would but luckily for him we run a construction business so have been able to employ him to learn a trade but are under no illusion that without us at the moment no one would give him work.

His brothers have learned with our help to pretend they can not hear him. They have been told he's ill. The way he still speaks to them and us his parents is shocking. It's only when he gets us in tears he stops and we get some relief. I often in public have to mouth read to people that he's ill.

I honestly think my only option would be to send him to the YMCA. Think he knows by now I could not do that even for the childhood he's robbing his brothers.

In conclusion its livable. I await the day when something happens to change him but can not see it as it seems to be in him.

The worst thing he does is wish me dead in detail on a daily basis. like...... I hope the wheels come off your car and you crash an die.

I have given up. Never thought I would, always the first to say I would do this, that or the other but this has worn me into the ground and I pray for the day he leaves home.

It's a classic case of I love him but do not like him. He is not a nice lad to his family. He now smokes and goes out drinking but one thing I have come to terms with is he is our problem.

I hope those going though the same find a better solution than we did.

Thanks to all that have replied to this thread and have PM'd with support. I am glad to report I have not been shot and take no offense to this as like I said I am used to remarks like that and am above them.

Nikki. xxx

naughty_10382

Just read this all the way through, and IMHO, reading your last post and the fact he is now almost 17, I'd be asking him to pack his bags. It sounds like you've done all you can for him. He appears to still have absolutely zero respect for his family, and I'd be worried his siblings will behave in the same mannerin a few years if this is what they've been growing up with.

Just my 2 pence, good luck whatever your decision x

ailuro2

Thanks for the update.

He might be ill - have you had him to the Drs for a psychiatric assessment?

Paparika

Just wondering if he needs a girlfriend?

This might calm him down perhaps.. maybe..

Fair play to you that your all still strong and still together

funky-footprints

a girl friend ? good grief ? the poor girl ? what would she offer him that his mum hasnt for 17 years ?

i think he is old enough to stand on his own 2 feet for a while, maybe that is what he needs ? ?