Relationship advice: my OH didn't defend me!!

slinks

Loopy_Laura wrote:

The moment I saw 'Vicky Pollard' I knew you had to be talking about Croydon!! Can totally empathise with you, was in a similar situation in KFC Croydon, except that fight wasn't over chairs, but chicken drumsticks. Who knew Chicken could fly once they were battered and fried?!

If it was my boyfriend he would defend me verbally until it got physical, knows I could handle myself verbally but could not stand by and watch if people were physically doing stuff to me! If He didn't defend me then I'd have to say something to him...you're his special lady he should be watching out for you.

lol about Vicky Pollard - I bet it was her who started the KFC chicken fight tournament too!!!

I am his special lady and he's my special man - as special as we are to each other, we should protect each other, full stop.

slinks

hobo28 wrote:

That's the difference tho, you'd have stepped in. Her OH did nothing except go and collect his chairs!!

I often disagree with my partner but if push comes to shove (no pun intended), I have her back.

lol @ the pun

I thought unconciously, unconditionally that my OH had my back too

slinks

Neil0 wrote:

Had to look twice at you user name after reading what Crazy Lady called you:rolleyes:

??

slinks

delmontebanana wrote:

This is so true it hurts.
Here's some news to all the women who read this, MEN DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING UNLESS YOU SPELL IT OUT TO THEM. We really are from another planet!

Sit him down tonight and have a word, slinks.

i will thanku

slinks

clairey_em wrote:

God Slinks,

Id be gutted if my OH stood there and let all those people hurl abuse etc. Although I have to say, if it was me he would have killed them! There's nothing like an Ikea special offer to bring out the worst in people. Sad to say, I used to work for Ikea in Croydon, although left a few years ago now, and it used to be a great place to work, friendly and good fun, but I won't go there anymore, if we need anything I'll go to Thurrock. It's really gone downhill. Noone wants to help you, they are ridiculously short staffed and even when a 'manager' comes to help nothing happens. I'd write to the store manager (name on ikea croydon web site) and also to customer services, and their head office, to the UK manager. That way at least someone might take note as that sort of behaviour is totally unacceptable. In my experience, shopping at Thurrock is a far more enjoyable experience, I know it's a much less busier store but seriously, Croydon is awful!!:eek:

But you've got to sort OH out, he should be looking out for you, even if he was scared and intimidated (although would prob not admit it).;)

x x

Thanks for the advice. I will be going on the IKEA site shortly to start the ball rolling. I'll do as you say and address it to all the above!!!

First of all, though, I really want to get my relationship problem ball rolling...

slinks

thanks to everyone for your help xx

matto

I've had my OH have a go at me for being rude and arrogant after sticking up for her.

Dora_the_Explorer_5

Ikea Rage - first cousin to Road Rage !

Slinks, sit down with the boyfie, tell him exactly what your feelings were at the time, ask him what his feelings were at the time, tell him what your feelings are now, ask him what his feelings are now. Then you'll both know where you stand and can move on because it soundsl ike it's the elephant in the room at the moment.

DavidF

Im a bloke and i would most probably have stuck up for you EVEN though im not your partner. If i was your oh i would consider that i would have No alternative other than to defend you come what may. This would have been done at the 1st sign of tension. As it was females involved i would most probably have shouted the security guard over and told him sort it or I will. Simple you give the store the option and are being protective of your own at the same time. I dont like violence at all. I hate rowing ect ect. But if it is there in front of me then i will meet it head on. Your oh actions are im my opinion very questionable.

It used to be the 1st thing a man would do in years gone by. Protect his family at all costs. Show your oh this thread and talk it through after. May be that he can re-assure you much better than any of us ever could. Hemay also need assertiveness classes as you cannot go through life being pushed around and avoiding conflict at all costs. It would be great if we could but im afraid the real world isn't like that.

Pleas dont take any of the above as a slur on your oh as its not really intended to be. Just a few things he may need to chew over for a bit. Maybe he feels unmanly(If there is such a word) because he didnt react as he would have wanted to when faced with a confrontation. some people do just freeze. But like i say you have to protect yourself and your family at any cost. Thats my view of the world today really. Because if i dont look after my family, Who is ?

Mumstheword

slinks wrote:

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She said you had BO = stinks, slinks!!

As for your original issue, I would expect my DH to back me up in such a situation. He would place himself between me and the offending articles! If he thought I was in the wrong, a look on his face would tell me to shut up (he's a brave man, lol). If he thought I was in the right, he would take over the arguement and put them in their place.