I just do not know what to do

Sexy_Legs

Hi Tina

((Hug)), it is early days, you will get there, some great advice on here.

I have some Self Help Hypnosis CD's MP3 so if you are interested I get arrange to send these to you via MSN Messenger. PM me your email address and I'll send you a few.

They are really good for relaxation and positive thinking.

D

gabyjane

Hi Tina..i read your post out when it first started to dh as this is how me and dd's dad broke up (my hubby now was a good friend at the time and he knew how things had been for me)..it is very hurtful and you are bound to think of things all the time in your head..it's natural.
I had just had our second baby and a toddler in tow when i found out that my rat of a partner then was deff cheating on me..he did a runner with everything and one of the kids and left me with huge debts..I thought i would never ever get through life, i dont think i ever cried so much either BUT you know what i KNEW I had done the right thing by not crawling back to him when he wanted me to after he had got caught out..in my head it may have made me happier (it wouldn't but poss easier?)..it was hard and i sympathise exactly how you are feeling and sounds like many others on here do too. I had not many friends due to him, my family had disowned me to a certain extent but i have come through it.
I just wanted to say please take each day as it comes..i never believed everyone saying to me you will get over this...but you honestly will..im reading this each day and am hoping all is getting better day by day..hugs xx

lilmissmup

If you can spare the pennies I really recommend this book:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0007225180/ref=ox_ya_oh_product

Its very funny but with good tips and also stories of how a break up can make women crazy and makes you feel a bit more, sane, well did for me anyway.

Also I found this good to read when I first split with my ex

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-a-Break-Up

Keep posting hun, your not alone (sadly) in what you have been through, I feel like I am having to start all over again now because hes toyed with me and I would hate for you to have to do it twice too xx

catlovin_gal11

Thinking about you. I think it's time for you to indulge yourself and to protect yourself to help you this weekend, particularly if you are not too chipper. I recommend some good bubble bath, chocolate, some funny DVD's,(or even some tear jerkers if you want to get things out of your system!) some nice lavender room scenters and treat yourself to a big lovely cuddly Teddy Bear. I talk to mine often-and they are great for cuddles, they listen and don't answer back!! If you have a crystal shop near you, get some crystals to help heal your emotions. I know lots of people don't believe in them, but you would be surprised what helps. Just remember, you are a good person and you deserve to be comforted. I hope you do have a friend you can talk to also.
If you have the strength to go out, try going for a walk in some nice countryside if the weather is OK, or a Park. You may even find someone you can talk to there. People often chat on benches in our Parks. When you are feeling more up to going out, try a dance class or a common interest group for what you enjoy. It is now your time and you are entitled to enjoy whatever you can in life after what has happened. Please be kind to yourself and look after yourself. Love and hugs to you again.

zztopgirl

Hi Tina, will be thinking of you this weekend, i have crashed again, it just seems to be 2 steps forward, 1 back at moment. I saw ex today, i was sat in a cafe and he drove past (wouldnt have seen me at all) and felt huge pain, i miss going for drives, we were always driving about, with a little picnic and flask of tea or getting takeaways. Im hurting tonight, it doesnt seem to be easing with time, but eventually it will and thats what you have to remember too, think about where you see yourself in a years time. Hopefully you will have worked through the healing process quite a bit.

Dont think about others who are better off than you and especially not happy couples, you are you only and you can live your life as you see fit. Think about how unique and wonderful you are, you are a strong lady (takes one to know one!), and with self-work and time, you will come out the other side and there will be the right man out there for you, for when you are ready to meet him and who truly does deserve you, but just at the moment, you have to go through this horrible pain and get it out of your system. Learn to enjoy your singledom, i do know its very hard but please try to look for the positives and ignore the negatives.

Dont forget, you arent alone:Aim thinking of you xx

alyth

tinatony1 wrote: »

I am not good at all today, i am really dreading the weekend, i just dont know what to do so i end up watching crappy tv all day. i am really beginning to doubt if i can actually do this, my every thought is of him and how i miss him so much, i miss the closeness of another person.

i thought it would get better and easier but it doesnt it has just got harder and harder

Tina I read this about 6pm, tonight I think, then went off, did housework, etc and worried about you all night! If you were anywhere up north I would drive to come and see you!

wallow - that's what you have to do. it will get harder - honey I promise you it will get harder than what you are going through now. I remember walking the dog, in my jammies through fields, the dog had to be walked but there was no way on this earth I could ever get dressed - crying. And i could not stop crying. I met a woman who lived over the back from me - picture the scene, I am out walking a rottie, in my jammies and wellies, crying as if the earth has burnt or something. Very posh woman out walking her lab walked past me, and I kind of apologised for being in the state I was, because I live in a small village, she knew what ex had done. She hugged me. I cried more. My rottie tried to eat her lab. :rotfl:

but Tina, if I had had the support that you have had over the last few weeks, I wouldn't have been out walking the dog in my jammies! I wish I had been strong enough to post as you did, instead I sat at home wallowing and fretting, there's still an missed episode of Gavin & Stacey that I can't watch becaue when I watched it I cried so much I ended up with fur over my face from crying into the dog!

I am not trying to be flippant in the least, what I am trying to say to you is that there is light at the end of the tunnel, you can't go out walking the goldfish in your jamies, but maybe one day your might go to the local shop in your jammies - you think you have hit rock bottom, we've all done it (I hope!)

Hugs Tina, I've been thinking of you all night which is something I never do about people on this site, do whatever you want to do this weekend, wallow, cry, scream, eat chocolate until you are sick , only you know what you are capable of, follow your own instincts and please above all look after yourself.

J xx

WannaBeTeenager

things will get better, it will take time but it will get better, get your head into something.

smallpackages

hey babe. you are cared and thought about. this is all very hurtful and probably the mostshattering thing to happen to you and i realise you feel alone because when you feel as you do its hard to believe anyone lives through this devastation. you are doing great. you are allowing yourself to wade through the process and cope with all the feelings and hurt. please trust me when i say that although you dont feel it just now, you my darling are a tower of strength! i am so impressed with how you are conducting yourself. its day to day existing just now but that will change, it will get better you will stand taller and you will smile and laugh again. the sun will shine again for you. this is the begining of something else, something unknown and at times scarey. feel the fear and do it anyway. i think you're great. keep the lights on and go out in the daylight each day, eat well and sleep often. try the swimming pool it is relaxing and bright and you dont have to talk to anyone if you dont want to. there is a future for you, something good may be just around the next bend. one day you will wake up and it won't hurt so much. my thoughts are with you honey xxxxxxx

nm123_2

tinatony1 wrote: »

I am not good at all today, i am really dreading the weekend, i just dont know what to do so i end up watching crappy tv all day. i am really beginning to doubt if i can actually do this, my every thought is of him and how i miss him so much, i miss the closeness of another person.

i thought it would get better and easier but it doesnt it has just got harder and harder

Hi Tina,

Just saying hi. I didn't have much time to post yesterday as work was manic... And I was at the wedding on Thursday, which was better than expected.

What are you up to today? I think you should at least get some fresh air, even if it's a walk up the shop to by a trashy mag. And remember, start looking out for those 3 things - a sneaky bit of blue sky might be the best you get today, but it's still worth looking out for and logging it.

I'll pop back later to see how you are.

MyRubyRed

Hi Tina. More crappy TV tonight but perhaps we can have a bit of a giggle over Xfactor :rotfl:to take your mind off things a bit?? xxxxx