Perfect Wedding Present?

trigger_mike

we are getting in june and also have everything we need, we put a note in the invites asking for money towards are honeymoon which most people are o.k with though we have had a couple of family members moan saying it was a cheak, this has really angerd me and i feel like say sod ya then don't bother coming!

VickyA_2

We're getting married in July and my mum is uncomfortable with putting our wedding list details in with the invitation (John Lewis). My friends are "expecting" (ok, so I did a straw poll of 2!) to have a wedding list included. My mum and I have come to an agreement that the list will go into our friends' invitations and not into family invitations. I'm perfectly happy with this, as to be honest I'll just be glad they're with me to celebrate the day!

Debras_Angel

trigger_mike wrote:

we are getting in june and also have everything we need, we put a note in the invites asking for money towards are honeymoon which most people are o.k with though we have had a couple of family members moan saying it was a cheak, this has really angerd me and i feel like say sod ya then don't bother coming!

So are you saying that you only want people to come if they buy you something...getting married isn't about what you're going to get from the guests.

It's about what you're getting to get for a lifetime when you say I do!!

Debs

andycarmi

What do you mean re-vamp?? Will vouchers for a shop you like not do the trick? Or if you were thinking of a new kitchen places like B and Q do vouchers!!!

Wizwoo

Vouchers are a good idea. Have you looked into where you'd like your kitchen from (as some of the others have suggested)? You might find that some companies can help by opening a "wedding account" for you. Although you may want to get all the details re: what you want and the price you pay before you start.

A lot of holiday companies do this when couples ask their guests to contribute towards their honeymoon.

Otherwise IKEA or B&Q could help. Maybe you could do a small list for those who would really prefer to buy a gift, of things to go into the new kitchen.

Best of luck

Rachie_B

i agree vouchers is better IMO

also pleeeeeeeeeeease dont do the tacky poem thang yuck ! lol
much better to come out with it and state on the info sheet rather than fluff it up in a poem !

personally i felt uncomfortable putting anything in with the invites etc so only when people asked did we say where our gift list was held and those who didnt ask gave money / vouchers anyway

the pressies arent the main part of the day and we really wouldnt have minded had we not gotten anything ,but i think if you ARE going to ask for something specific then being upfront is best

emma_b_4

we have the same dilemma, we would like the money rather than presents as we have everything we need. we couldnt really ask for vouchers as we would put it towards doing out the loft...

i took the "sod ya then dont bother coming" to be quite funny and most ppl that are planninga wedding must have thought that at some point. its strnage how planning a wedding can spark off arguments between families, friends just seem to go with the flow and do whatever.

we have been to one wedding where they asked for money we wrote a cheque for fifty quid and put it in the card, saved queing for a voucher! and hunting for a prezzie! one wedding we had a wedding list and it was so hard to choose something and the list had to be printed off in store so was upto date and then we had to hunt the gifts down, in a busy debenhams it wasnt much fun! ended up getting them some kind of plant pot that they wanted..

i really dont know what to do with our ivites, i think i will just print off a note to say we have enough toasters kettles etc and we would be very grateful for a donation towrds renovation of our loft
would ppl REALLY be that offended?! to be fair how many couple actually get married b4 they live together these days i think the age of buying a toaster or an iron is passing now..

if ppl wanna buy a prezzie they could use their imagination still and get something like a picture frame or they could ring and say they would rather buy you something, in which case im sure you could think of something!

i dont want to ask for vouchers bcos thers nothing we want that much of from one shop so ££ would be better then we spend it wherever.

on the subject of children at the "do" that is another point that makes or breaks families! we are having childre, our own (on its way!) and my neice or nephew (on its way!) and then 3 children of friends. we arent however inviting cousins to that day do and my gran is disgusted as weddings are family days. fair point but at £30 per head i cant afford to invite 15 cousins and their partners! they can come to the night party no problem...then theres the issue of "what do we do with them during the day" well everyone has a years notice to decide.

it might sound harsh and wont be to everybodys taste but i have a huge family and dont even see my cousins. i undrstand it will be difficult for the few who have children, but you have to draw the line somewhere!

rant over!!

hehe
AND I THOUGH PLANNING A WEDDING WOULD BE SOOO MUCH FUN!!!!!

Becles

I didn't put anything about gifts in with the invitation.

We're in the same boat as he is moving into my house that I've lived in for years, so don't need the traditional presents. If people have asked us, we've said we are going to do some decorating after our honeymoon so DIY shop vouchers would be useful. We also have a small wedding list with a range of odds and ends on for people who want to buy a gift.

If you register a list at Debenhams, they give you a free £50 gift voucher when you open the list. It's worth spending an hour or so making a small list just to get the free voucher, even if nobody buys from it

I was on the Debenhams website the other day and noticed my brothers dog has bought us a small gift :rotfl:

trigger_mike

Debras_Angel wrote:

So are you saying that you only want people to come if they buy you something...

No debs what i mean is you haven't got to give us anything but it annoyed me they they complained about about being asked to give us money.

broke_mary

hi everybody

thanks for all of your suggestions think we will write a small list for those who don't want to give money then ask for money still or maybe vouchers not sure on that yet as OH wants to do kitchen buying the cupboard shells, doors etc seperately and don't know where he wants to get it from.

also think we won't put list in with invites will wait until we're asked but make sure parents know we would really like money if anybody asks them.

as for asking children to the reception we've got 2 of our own so will be inviting children to our wedding but thats just our view.

think asking for money to help towards the cost of the meal is a brilliant idea if you can't afford it.