Husband too strict

LonelyLil

peachyprice wrote: »

Why
If they forget their PE kit they're the ones who will have to wear it when it's smelly or get a detention for it being dirty.

.

I dont want my kids to be picked on for being smelly, that is why I get cross if it is not brought home. Also what kind of mum sends their kids to school in a dirty PE kit? The kids go to quite a "nice" school and dirty kits are noticed.

Also it is the end of term and it needs to come home so i can see if it fits/need a new one.

Zazen999

LonelyLil wrote: »

He would have said I was being to soft and that she was wrapping me round her little finger.

So, nothing really then?

Don't you stand up to him and say that she's had an hour's punishment, will be washing the kit herself and that's plenty punishment for her?

robpw2

LonelyLil wrote: »

He would have said I was being to soft and that she was wrapping me round her little finger.

and ??
so wat if your a bit soft if thats all he would say ?

LonelyLil

robpw2 wrote: »

and ??
so wat if your a bit soft if thats all he would say ?

Yes, but next time something happens it would be all my fault as I am too soft. "I told you so" would be order of the day.

LonelyLil

Zazen999 wrote: »

So, nothing really then?

Don't you stand up to him and say that she's had an hour's punishment, will be washing the kit herself and that's plenty punishment for her?

He would say I am making a rod for my own back. I also dont like atmospheres in front of the kids or to undermine their father.

I dont let my 13 yr old watch 15 films. OH thinks I am being over protective. I would be pretty peed off if he went against what I said and let her watch one.

peachyprice

LonelyLil wrote: »

I dont want my kids to be picked on for being smelly, that is why I get cross if it is not brought home. Also what kind of mum sends their kids to school in a dirty PE kit? The kids go to quite a "nice" school and dirty kits are noticed.

Also it is the end of term and it needs to come home so i can see if it fits/need a new one.

Woah there, a very good mother actually, who's not afraid to make her children take responsiblity.

I did feel sorry for you, but after that comment I don't. Your OH is probably fed up with you pampering your children.

Oh, and my children go to a VERY nice school, which encourages children to be responsible for their own actions.

aliasojo

The punishment in itself wasn't wrong but the length of time it went on for, was. Imo.

Your daughter is 13, she's getting to the stage where normal teenage 'issues' will start to arise. My concern is that if her Dad thinks a 6 hour ish punishment is suitable for forgetting a PE kit, then how extreme might his reaction be to a more serious problem? (By the way, did she have dinner/supper?)

My Father was a very strict (but not violent) parent. I hated (and still do even although he is dead now) him with a vengeance. I'm told there were lots of good times and loving instances but I hand on heart cannot remember any of them. I don't recall my Mother standing up to him.

All I remember is impatience, irritation, annoyance and unfair punishments.

It's all about balance. It's important to find the right level of punishment if you have any chance of retaining respect and turning out a well balanced individual.

Any

Zazen999 wrote: »

So, nothing really then?

Don't you stand up to him and say that she's had an hour's punishment, will be washing the kit herself and that's plenty punishment for her?

I would do that.
As well as turning to her and say "and don't you think I am joking. You are washing it yourself".
Showing to both that you agree she needed punishment and not letting him down completely and next time she won't get away with it...

robpw2

LonelyLil wrote: »

Yes, but next time something happens it would be all my fault as I am too soft. "I told you so" would be order of the day.

i feel like i have walked into the school playground
you appear to be more worried about what he would or wouldnt say then you are of making sure your daughter ok ..

Any

LonelyLil wrote: »

He would say I am making a rod for my own back. I also dont like atmospheres in front of the kids or to undermine their father.

You are analysing everything too much.
You are going to worry yourself to death soon.