Childminder hit my child

poet123

I think you are missing the point,(maybe deliberately?). No one is saying those who do not have children have opinions which are less valid than those of us who do. Simply, that we have experiences that are different, and therefore bring a different perspective to the table.

I am sure your experiences have made a diference to the world. I also think that many of us could say the same, and it is slightly dismissive and arrogant of you to think you are in any way unique. In our jobs many of us bring about change, doctors, nurses, teachers, social workers, and parents. it may not be on a global scale, but change begins small, it begins locally, it begins at home.

Actually, your statement is evidence that you do not value parenting, or its contribution to society as highly as it deserves, maybe that is because you are not a parent, or maybe it is because you do not see the value in any contribution that is not "in your face".

Bettyboop

poet123 wrote: »

I think you are missing the point,(maybe deliberately?). No one is saying those who do not have children have opinions which are less valid than those of us who do. Simply, that we have expereinces that are different and therefore bring a different perspective to the table.

I am sure your experiences have made a diference to the world. I also think that many of us could say the same, and it is slightly dismissive and arrogant of you to think you are in any way unique. In our jobs many of us bring about change, doctors, nurses, teachers, social workers, and parents. it may not be on a global scale, but change begins small, it begins locally, it begins at home.

Actually, your statement is evidence that you do not value parenting, or its contribution to society as highly as it deserves, maybe that is because you are not a parent, or maybe it is because you do not see the value in any contribution that is not "in your face".

Poet, who are you referring to?

HariboJunkie

GracieP wrote: »

But to tell someone they can't know what it's like until they are a parent and to dismiss their opinions is bull.

Where on the thread did anyone dismiss the opinions of non parents?

Money_maker

Bettyboop wrote: »

Oh and just to echo she accepted a lift home with another childminder even though she didn't have two extra car seats for her daughter and the little boy- shocking! That happened today!

At the risk of going OT, this would shock me just as much as the smacking incident. How stupid, how on earth would they explain their way out of that one if there was an accident?

GracieP

poet123 wrote: »

Actually, your statement is evidence that you do not value parenting, or its contribution to society as highly as it deserves, maybe that is because you are not a parent, or maybe it is because you do not see the value in any contribution that is not "in your face".

OMG! How in the world did you get that? I see parenting as just about the most important job anyone can do. Tbh, I couldn't bear to have a child if I couldn't stay home with them each day. I'm also a huge advocate of home education, as I firmly believe that in many cases parents can provide their children with a far, far superior education than that available in schools. I intend to offer it to my children as an alternative to school if they prefer it.

As for in your face? I've spent as more time running charity shops than I have in high pressure situations. There is nothing in your face about standing in a back room sorting through what is mostly rubbish. And no, I don't believe I've made any particular change to the world, I've changed individual lives, perhaps, directly contributed to changes in some laws, but the status quo of the world has stayed the same. I'm extremely jaded when it comes to world changing right now. All I want to do at this point in my life is raise a family, but I miscarried my baby last year and since the start of this year my husband has been extremely ill so having a family has been off the cards.

Bettyboop

Money_maker wrote: »

At the risk of going OT, this would shock me just as much as the smacking incident. How stupid, how on earth would they explain their way out of that one if there was an accident?

I don't think anyone not even a Childminder could get out of this..... that's just it a lot of people think it's just 5 mins drive it will be okay. I completely disagree. It just takes some idiot to cut you up at the traffic lights etc... It's beyond relief and equally as bad I agree.

Zazen999

mishkanorman wrote: »

or are you saying that just because you WANT to be a mother that means you have the same view point as someone who is,

Absolutely not, one SD is enough for me, thanks.

I've make my point over and over; I think all the mummies are getting confuddled.

poet123

GracieP wrote: »

OMG! How in the world did you get that? I see parenting as just about the most important job anyone can do. Tbh, I couldn't bear to have a child if I couldn't stay home with them each day. I'm also a huge advocate of home education, as I firmly believe that in many cases parents can provide their children with a far, far superior education than that available in schools. I intend to offer it to my children as an alternative to school if they prefer it.

As for in your face? I've spent as more time running charity shops than I have in high pressure situations. There is nothing in your face about standing in a back room sorting through what is mostly rubbish. And no, I don't believe I've made any particular change to the world, I've changed individual lives, perhaps, directly contributed to changes in some laws, but the status quo of the world has stayed the same. I'm extremely jaded when it comes to world changing right now. All I want to do at this point in my life is raise a family, but I miscarried my baby last year and since the start of this year my husband has been extremely ill so having a family has been off the cards.

I got that impression from this element of your post;-

I stand corrected if since becoming a parent you've attempted to make a real change to the world, but the vast, vast majority of parents do no such thing.

And from your outlining the situations you found yourself in which clearly you felt was a greater attempt to change the world than that most parents make. I would have to disagree with that statement profoundly, I believe that parents change the world daily, for good or bad, by the way they interact with, and affect the opinions of the children in their care. It may not be as dramatic or frightening as you outlined, but it is just as frontline.

Your post certainly gave me the impression that you place heroics and front page activities over and above the sometimes mundane taks of parenting. Mundane it may be, but actually every parent affects society far more than anyone else, no matter how high profile or dangerous their job.

I am very sorry for your loss, but I must be honest when I say that I think that it is that issue which has contributed more to the reaction you have had to comments re parenting on this thread, and not the actual post content.

No one here has dismissed the opinions of those without children, just stated that when you have children you have a different perspective, an added dimension to the opinions you express. It is the same with anything, I can express an opinion on scuba diving if I have watched someone do it, my opinion will not be as in depth as those who regularly undertake the hobby, for obvious reasons. It is no different to this scenario here, quite why it raises the hackles of so many confuses me. It is just common sense imo.

poet123

Bettyboop wrote: »

Poet, who are you referring to?

Sorry, should have quoted, it was GracieP.

JoeyG

poet123 wrote: »

Your post certainly gave me the impression that you place heroics and front page activities over and above the sometimes mundane taks of parenting. Mundane it may be, but actually every parent affects society far more than anyone else, no matter how high profile or dangerous their job.

To be fair, and just to get balance to this, there are also plenty of parents who would have made a greater contribution to society by not having children... we all know the type I mean