Childminder hit my child

OrkneyStar

dollydoodah wrote: »

You shouldn't HAVE to tell a childminder not to smack a child the same way you shouldn't have to tell a teacher not to smack. It is the law.

Yes reading later posts I now realise this.
Perhaps the issue of smacking could be brought up in a discussion along the lines of what discipline you use and would like the childminder to use (eg naughty step, sanction of treats etc).

kjmtidea

Is it just my kids who wander off every now and then and only me who doesn't have a conniption about it? Clearly I am a terrible parent lol.

The childminder should never have smacked your child, you shouldn't have to tell her that you don't want your child smacked, just like you shouldn't have to tell her that you don't want your child playing with the oven, plugs or left in the bath alone. It is common sense and as a childminder she should have plenty of that.

Find a new childminder asap.

galvanizersbaby

consultant31 wrote: »

My personal opinion - and I know I'll get shot down in flames - if you want children, you should bring them up yourself. I had 3 and had £50 a week to feed the 5 of us and pay the bills (gas, electric and phone). It was a long time ago but we were very short of cash the whole time they were growing up. I got a part-time job when my youngest was 4 and starting school and I was always there for them when they came home.

Whatever happens in life, my children are the most important part of it for me and my husband. Money takes a back seat. If I couldn't afford to buy something, we did without (and still do though we're much better off now).

I know people are all different and there will be posters who lambast me for old-fashioned views. I'm not trying to force my opinions onto anybody, but that's the way I feel. In my case, any discipline my children received was from me and therefore was consistent and minimal.

I don't intend to offend any working Mums. I just think children should top the list of priorities. After all, it's only a very few years until they start school and then you're much more free to earn a living.

Perhaps in an ideal world - some people's circumstances change - perhaps they intended to be there for their children and things changed so they had to work to support their children - it's either that or claim benefits for some.
Not just a case of working to be able afford luxuries.
My children certainly top my list of priorities and I work to be able to feed and clothe them - I think it's perfectly possible to achieve a healthy balance and still 'bring up your children' yourself whilst working.

I'm not anti childminders and I am sure there are many great childminders out there but some I have seen appear to be mum's with young children of their own trying to cram as many children as possible in to their homes for money.
I see it suggested many times on this board to just about anyone as a way to generate income when you have small children of your own so I'm hardly surprised when I see posts like this and the OP appears to have an unsuitable candidate for a childminder.

noodledoodle78

Reggie_Rebel wrote: »

There's a lot of assumptions that the Child minder is a registered Child minder.

As the child has been with the Child minder since the age of four months, is collected by Grandparents and the Parent has seemingly no idea how their child behaves while out shopping it's perhaps not an assumption that should be made.

Registered or not smacking the child unless it's an agreed course of action is not acceptable

The fact that my parents pick up my child for me when they finish work is really not the issue.

The childminder is registered and fully qualified and insured. References were taken when we first employed her.

I am well aware of my child's behaviour. I only stated that the hiding under the railing was not something I had witnessed nor would it be something I would welcome

consultant31

galvanizersbaby wrote: »

I'm not anti childminders and I am sure there are many great childminders out there but some I have seen appear to be mum's with young children of their own trying to cram as many children as possible in to their homes for money.
I see it suggested many times on this board to just about anyone as a way to generate income when you have small children of your own so I'm hardly surprised when I see posts like this and the OP appears to have an unsuitable candidate for a childminder.

As far as I know, it's not a soft option, choosing to be a childminder. The rules and regulations are many and vatied and they are monitored carefully, by Ofsted. They have to follow Early Years framework, attend regular meetings, keep up-to-date with first-aid training etc, etc. They are only allowed a certain number of children, dependant on the room available.

mrcow

noodledoodle78 wrote: »

The fact that my parents pick up my child for me when they finish work is really not the issue.

The childminder is registered and fully qualified and insured. References were taken when we first employed her.

I am well aware of my child's behaviour. I only stated that the hiding under the railing was not something I had witnessed nor would it be something I would welcome

So where is your son today?

noodledoodle78

My mum has him today.

lostinrates

as a child I took great delight in hiding in department stores. I learned the first time tht if you find a security guard who can't find your Mummy/nanny that they give you a lollipop and say you can stay the night, sleep in a four poster bed in the bed department and play with all the toys then put out tannoy messages (I thought that was super). I don't suppose they give lollipops now, with the risk of allergies etc,

As for not taking the child out, while shopping can be very, very boring for kids, it gets them out, walking and somewhat stimulated. I'd personally rather a child got out a bit than stayed in in frnt of cartons etc. The ideal would be a childmonder who might pop out shopping with them occasionally, but at other times kept them stimulated with park walks/stories, crafts etc, but I guess thats hard to find. I imagine part of the job is knowing its something that fits in with life.

OP, I wouldn't send him back because he's scared and its got out of control and beyond your scale of knowing what to do, so it will be WAY out of his. it wouldn't be the shopping, the smacking (despite its illegality) or the mother being there that would do it for me: it would be that I was not informed immeadiately and apologised to and that the child was left feeing ongoing fear of the childminder after the event. He surely needs to feel secure and safe when with ''his'' grown ups: whether thats you his grandparents or the childminder.

The caveat is that I am not a mother.

mrcow

noodledoodle78 wrote: »

My mum has him today.

lol this is like getting blood from a stone!

Have you put a complaint in?

peachyprice

noodledoodle78 wrote: »

My mum has him today.

Hi Noddle, how are you and your OH feeling about it all?
Have you come to a decision as to what you're going to do?