Advice on maybe cheating other half

fatpiggy

I occasionally receive texts which were obviously sent to me in error. I always reply telling the sender they have made a mistake - then I delete the "wrong" text. Sorry, but I also think your partner was lying. However, it does sound like it is over and if you are happy to accept his explanation then so be it. He knows to watch himself now, either way.

pinkshoes

So... this colleague who it was supposed to go to... what's HIS name? Obviously it would have to start with the same (or close) letter as your OH's name, as phones organise things alphabetically. I accidently sent a text to "Dad" instead of "Dave" once...

I doubt this woman just typed the number in...

I also think he's lying I'm afraid. "Invasion of privacy"??? Even I said that to an ex I cheated on many years ago when he looked at my phone and I was worried I hadn't deleted everything!! It's a classic line from someone who has something to hide!

TotallyBroke

pinkshoes wrote: »

So... this colleage who it was supposed to go to... what's HIS name? Obviously it would have to start with the same (or close) letter as your OH's name, as phones organise things alphabetically. I accidently sent a text to "Dad" instead of "Dave" once...

I doubt this woman just typed the number in...

That doesn't always work though. As some phones now you can put people into groups. You can then write a message and scroll through your groups and pick a person. She could have all her work people under the group work. So you could have the group of 5 people with names beginning with A, F, L,T and Z. Having groups actually makes it easier when sending a message to multiple people about the same thing.
I personally only delete my messages when my boxes are full. So I have loads of half conversations. He may well have only deleted the last one or two.

But ultimately it is upto the OP to decide whether she believes him or not. But what I would agree with is something someone else said, to keep snooping and mistrusting will cause more damage.
Why don't you ask your OH if he would consider arranging a night out with work collegues and partners? Explain that it would put your mind at ease about your relationship.

cocktail

it is in fact a fantastic opportunity for the OP.
from now on she should snoop around for more evidence. almost every one on this thread believes and knows that what the OP's partner said was b@@@@@s.
carli--watch for an empty text box in his mobile. he is likely to delete all texts that he gets. he may leave some texts in his phone to mislead you. these will remain in the phone. check the dates on them . if he leaves old texts on and deletes the new ones then you got him.
also check phone bills for new numbers you do not recognise being called frequently--mobile and home phone. if you do find a number being called frequently then call that number--a blank call. it will be the woman!

aliasojo

CarliJ wrote: »

I believe him, although i did ask why he took his phone everywhere he went, and thats why i had to look and he said its only because just in case his grandad phones him (he is in his 80 and a bit doddery) and needs him asap.

Regardless of everything else, I dont believe this is the real reason for taking his phone into the bathroom with him. Especially if there is someone else in the house who could easily take the call and shout on him if need be.

cocktail

CarliJ wrote: »

Well everyone on here seems to be having a debate!

So i got home and he got in about 7.30ish. we had dinner then i said to him that i did feel ashamed to say this but i looked at your phone on Saturday night whilst you were in the shower, and found the said text message from your work collegue. he went all angry at me for invading his privicy but then he told me that the text message wasnt meant for him, and that this work collegue has been playing away from her husband with one of his other work collegues and she sent the text message accidently to him instead of the other man. I said that why didnt he tell me that she had text him, to which he replyed that he didnt think he needed to as it wasnt for him anyway, and that he would never cheat on me, as thats what happened to his dad when he was a young boy and couldnt do it to me. I believe him, although i did ask why he took his phone everywhere he went, and thats why i had to look and he said its only because just in case his grandad phones him (he is in his 80 and a bit doddery) and needs him asap.

So there you have it, we actually communicated and guess what thats what we should have done a long time ago! :rolleyes: I have already said to him that i wont be looking on his phone any longer, to which he replied that he wouldnt mind if i did as he has nothing to hide.

Everyone thanks for your comments, constructive and otherwise, it has helped me more than you can ever know.

C xx

carli are you blonde!

ChrisCobra

cocktail wrote: »

carli are you blonde!

[strike]Blonde[/strike] , Gullable more like

*Louise*

^^I really don't think there's any need to insult her.

When people are in love they can be desperate to believe what they are told in order to save their relationship.

swiss69

You tend to believe what you want to believe.....

Some people are that insecure with themselves that they cant envisage starting again. Why do people stay in loveless marriages or with partners who hit them otherwise? I once suggested on here that someone was nuts for staying with a man who hit her time and time again. Unbelieveably I got response after response from Women saying they could fully understand it....I still cant understand it now!

RichyRich

Jesus Christ Almighty!

He could have given any reason or any explanation and you wouldn't have believed him! You had all already decided he was guilty before you had even got the response.

What is it with women that makes them think that anyone with a c0ck is incapable of being truthful or faithful?

The OP is the one who is parters with this guy, and surely the one best placed to see if he is telling the truth or not. Personally, I found the bit about him telling her immediately without any hesitation particularly reassuring - he obviously wasn't expecting her to ask because he didn't suspect her of looking, but was able to offer an instant explanation...sounds like he's telling the truth to me.

I keep all my texts and just "Delete All" when it gets full, whether they are sent in error or not. The OP saw one text on his phone - how do any of you know there wasn't another further down the list apologising for sending to the wrong person?

You are all so quick to be suspicious and disbelieve but I wonder how you'd feel if it were YOU that were accused. Assuming, of course, you were innocent.