Help me please...i feel like giving up

Loretta

blackeel wrote: »

Had a quiet night, all above advice taken onboard..LOcal Victim Support contacted, initially by email, and getting something ready to ask/tell police today...Thanks again for support.......but the lack of concrete evidence that last nights calls/texts had anything to do with him, makes me wonder if i will actually lose credibility with police instead of gaining it...Found there is a local "bobbyvan", so asking about this as well.

Your job is to report that you think this is a crime it is up to the police to investigate and find out who it is, that is their job, getting them to do it is the hard bit

ELIZA_D

blackeel wrote: »

Apology accepted lol....

After a very hesitant and disturbing morning,and then getting info from Police, I was depressed until 2pm ish..but picked myself up and took kids out and really enjoyed myself...the only thing was, i forgot to tell a close friend that i'd gone out, and was enjoying myself, while they worried that i was depressed and crying, as i was when i last spoke to them....i think ive got a bridge to build here..

Thanks again for all the help

A friend should be just that "a friend".........dont take on everything and worry about that too.Of course your mind is all over the place and when you get a bit of energy to make your kids happy then of course that is paramount and all else would be forgotten.Im sure they will understand if you apologise and explain to them exactly what you have said to us.........

blackeel

Phoned Police today, spoke to someone who was DV trained...explained everything,,,,the warning was issued, if he breaks it, they'll see him again...and theyve told me to just carry on as normal for the time being...Working on getting added security.....and "Built my bridge" with my best friend....

Thanks again...

Diamond78

Hiya,
Just wanted to know how you are and how things are. Hope you and the kids are all well and good. Hugs x

blackeel

Diamond78 wrote: »

Hiya,
Just wanted to know how you are and how things are. Hope you and the kids are all well and good. Hugs x

Well, after police warned him, and funny texts/calls Saturday, i heard nothing ...until tonight when he rang about 11ish....Saying that police said he could ring, as long as it wasnt threatening...he then went on to make silly accusations, and which point i told him to go...Ive written down what he said and will ring DV unit again tomorrow to see if thats true what he said(about non threatening calls), and if it is...how do they know when the call is threatening, when they havent heard it....So hopefully they'll tell him not to call at all, and i'm also worried about him calling my eldest and am tempted to "lose" her phone

Had a really traumatic couple of days, with tragic news that a good friend been killed in a road accident, and then an old friend coming back into my life.....So lots happening....maybe too much at the same time, but ive got a lot more confidence, although naturally down due to circumstances above....

Got up for a drink(tea) and felt uncontrollable urge to switch PC on....thanks for your concern...

Mely

Ive been following your story with great concern for you, and your children. Im so pleased that you are working together with the police, as you cant keep on living like this.
I definately think your idea of 'losing' your eldests phone is a good idea, as you dont want your ex upsetting/unsettling her anymore than he has done.
I hope you are feeling ok today (((hugs)))

blackeel

Update....

Had mixed feelings few days...very sad at times with death of good friend, but also elation at times with meeting an old friend again....

Bobby van request going through system....

Police must have been to see him again, as texts and calls stopped

Found out where he living and informed Injunction people...but theres a sting in this.....apparently, as i'm on legal aid for my solicitor, i can't get legal aid in two places at the same time....and am now realising my solicitor isnt very good, but because shes also doing house and other stuff, i am reluctant(at the moment) to look elsewhere..and I'm not even sure if theres another solicitor in my area that does legal aid.....apart from the peolpe "he" is with....

Ive also realised that this injunction has to go through the courts....Now last year i would have gone for it...he was violent, stealing things, very very harrassing and it was bad....but now....what evidence do i have to go to court with...a few texts and the odd phone call.....and he can be a sweet talker, a charmer at times....whereas i will be very nervous and not at all confident incourt......So what do i do.....???

At the moment things are ok...hes not bothering me at all...although hes still talking to my eldest, but i think she is wise to this, and tells me everything...

So do i upset the tranquility and go for something that doesnt carry a lot of weight behind it...or sit and wait to see if it gets heavier(i honestly dont think it will get violent(his councelling does seem to have worked)....and go for it later..

I'm surprised at the police's attitude this time...it is far more understanding of what i am going through than it has ever been....

Thanks again for all the continued help and advice...........and all the hugs..

Mely

Hi...i was wondering how things are going today for you? I hope your ok,

busiscoming2

Hi blackeel, I too have been keeping up with your story. I would try to find out if there is another solictor in your area, but then again I wouldn't know if its better to have one solicitor to sort out both house and the litigation.

blackeel

blackeel wrote: »

Update....
I've also realised that this injunction has to go through the courts....Now last year i would have gone for it...he was violent, stealing things, very very harrassing and it was bad....but now....what evidence do i have to go to court with...a few texts and the odd phone call.....and he can be a sweet talker, a charmer at times....whereas i will be very nervous and not at all confident incourt......So what do i do.....???

At the moment things are ok...hes not bothering me at all...although hes still talking to my eldest, but i think she is wise to this, and tells me everything...

So do i upset the tranquility and go for something that doesnt carry a lot of weight behind it...or sit and wait to see if it gets heavier(i honestly dont think it will get violent(his councelling does seem to have worked)....and go for it later..

Still no further on, re Injunction, as still unsure...had a lovely weekend(apart from another misunderstanding), but friends are rallying around to help..

He hasnt bothered me once over the weekend. and eldest daughter has been away with my mum, and hes not bothered her either....

So I really dont know whether to put injunction off(for above reasons) to maintain the tranquillity......and if he does start again, the police seem willing to support me...

Thanks again for comcern