cheating - what now?

pantsdr

:lipsrseal :silenced:

feelinggood_2

pantsdr wrote: »

:lipsrseal :silenced:

Go ahead, tell me what you think. I'm ready for it

lindsaygalaxy

Sorry, had not read this part of the thread properly!

shellsuit

lindsaygalaxy wrote: »

so you had a threesome, he couldnt handle it. He had an affair, you agreed to forgive, then you both agreed to have an open relationship!

If you both are happy to have an open relationship thats fine if thats your thing. Personally its not for me, but if you are both happy about it, then thats your choice:) gotta say though you have had children in this complicated relationship, do you think it is fair on them?

BUT you cannot justify sleeping with a man with a pregnant wife, no matter how you try to explain it. If you just want 'fun', there are plenty of single men out there. Give yourself more respoect and find someone that deserves you completely, and by the sounds of it, thats not your husband either.

Lindsay, Feelinggood isn't the OP

pantsdr

feelinggood wrote: »

Go ahead, tell me what you think. I'm ready for it

SELF RESPECT?

feelinggood_2

pantsdr wrote: »

SELF RESPECT?

Whats that?? :rotfl:

Yes, I have no self-respect. I have low self-esteem. I feel worthless.

I know that. Don't know how to fix it though

superflygal

pandapiglet wrote: »

hi

i have signed on under a different name so not to be recognised.

before everyone starts i know that what i have done is wrong, but it's too late to turn back time and would appreciate some advice.

i am married and have been with my husband since aged 16, we have two kids, the eldest being 5. 2 years ago i started to have an affair with a work colleague (also my husbands work colleague) however he then moved away (i knew this was going to happen before affair began) and we didn't contact each other for a year (he is also married with kids and has been with his wife since aged 16).
a few months ago he returned and got his job back, whenever we saw each other we ignored each other and tried to act as if nothing had happened, however before long we were back doimg what we used to.

a few weeks ago he told me he loved me and i explained that i felt the same about him. he has asked me to leave my husband and we'll find somewhere to live together, however i don't know what to do.
to complicate things even more his wife is pregnant (i know i'm selfish and being a b$tch for carrying this on when i know this)
i don't doubt his love for me, but i do worry that if he's prepared to leave his pregnant wife and children for me then what does that say about our future together?
i still love my husband, but i think it's more as a friend than anything else and i trust him completely and know that he can provide a far more stable home for my children, but he's just not the other guy.

OMG.

What a horrible, selfish, self-centred person you are.

How can you:
a) Do that to your own family.
b) Wreck someone else's family as well in the process.

Absolutely disgraceful.

If you don't love your husband anymore, and there is no chance whatsoever, you LEAVE him. THEN you think about bonking someone else and AFTER a reasonable length of time, not the week after. You also, ensure they are not married. It's elementary really; also, it's called having morals and a sense of decency.

Think of the poor children involved. Are they going to understand their parents sexual libido and think, "Oh well, mummy was horny, so I have a broken home now. That's ok then". How can you do that to little kiddies. They need stability, not some loose mother who fancies other women's husbands and acts on her impulses. I'm sure you are convincing yourself that this new 'man' is better than their father, but have you even stopped to consider whether that is really true?

Think of the poor pregnant wife. How would you have felt if your husband was bonking some tramp when you were expecting your baby? You would have been devatated i'm sure. I am staggered you are even posting this appalling situation on here to be honest. Do you want approval?
Are you really that stupid to think this nasty man would be faithful to you?

I suggest you think very carefully about what you are doing. What goes around comes around.

SFG

melancholly

any chance the thread could be locked before anything more offensive is levelled at the OP?!

i don't approve of her actions but i think the condemation and personal attacks on here are just horrible.

pantsdr

melancholly wrote: »

any chance the thread could be locked before anything more offensive is levelled at the OP?!

i don't approve of her actions but i think the condemation and personal attacks on here are just horrible.

I have not attacked anyone personaly, their morals yes, indviduals no.:rolleyes:

Having said that the sheer number of people reading this thread shows what a thought provoking and inclusive debate infidelity is.

However, and this is directed at the OP and FG, why did you feel the need to air your frustrations on 'money saving' forum? Just type infidelity into google and i'm sure you will find many an avenue for your 'blogging'.

spacecommander

melancholly wrote: »

any chance the thread could be locked before anything more offensive is levelled at the OP?!

i don't approve of her actions but i think the condemation and personal attacks on here are just horrible.

Totally agree with you there, some of the comments are just downright unnecessary, and definitely not MSE.

Everyone has their views, but some things that have been said are just awful.