Daughter getting bullied

veryskint_3

aliasojo wrote: »

Glad things are better for your girl now veryskint. She must be a lot happier and you must be very relieved.

Pleased for you. Thanks for updating.

Hi thanks for your response. Also with the backup my daughter is getting from school she is able to actually stand up to the girl :T (or rather little monster) so its very rare(touch wood) she says anything to my girl now.
:j :j :j :j :j
its awful for kids who get bullied it just strips away at their self steem. Im here to talk if anyone needs to!!!!!

elaine373

This happened to my daughter for a year. I went into the school and even had a joint meeting with the head and my child. I was told it was an age thing with girls etc etc. (They were 9 years old) I knew in my heart it was not. I moved my daughter to another school in october and thankfully she has been very happy since. When i look back i realised how , her self esteem had got so low and how she was accepting what she shouldnt had, had to accept. This was all caused by one girl who had most of the class at her beck and call. If the school isnt seeing the problem then maybe you should consider doing the same thing. Not an easy thing and always a gamble at a new school.I wish you all the best.

mrcow

It's jealousy.

Make sure that your daughter knows this. This is why the girl wants to "take friends off" her.

A bully can only be effective if you allow them to be. Once your daughter can understand that this kid is just a small minded jealous nobody who is so unhappy with her own life that she has to put your daughter down to make herself feel better about it all, then she'll feel better about sticking up for herself.

Glad everything is getting better now.

ailuro2

shays_mum wrote: »

i think i will look into the kupso thing, does anyone have any links for any in London, can't find anything.

Kupso only has classes in Scotland currently afaik, but Ju Jitsu, Tae Kwon Do, Karate, Judo etc. are other martial arts that may be in your area - go along and watch a class and ask lots of questions about what they teach, and find one you are happy with.

Good Luck, I hope you've calmed down now, it's hard when other kids stop playing with your child, it's very hurtful and confusing for them, I always told DD that friendships come and go, and to find someone else who doesn't want to play the game either and team up with them (there was one old friend who wanted to play 'their' game all the time and never anyone else's:rolleyes: , had the the rest of the kids playing her games except DD who had grown fed up of it, thankfully as time went on the rest of them got fed up too and now some new alliances have been formed and DD is happy again) It ebbs and flows, good luck with it.

mum.s

Pleased for you Veryskint, well done, you should keep this thread going as there seems to be a lot of parents on this site who have/are complaining of Bullies and hopefully we can all support each other.

Shays-mum my DS started Judo 3 weeks ago, he loves it. the beginners class has both girls and boys of similar ability, it involves a lot of team work and pairing up with someone of the same ability, my DS has a lot of fun, running around the mats, hopping around on one foot, lying on his back with his feet and hands in the air and trying to get from one side of the mat to the other and only being able to wiggle across, the whole class become a team against the instructor at dodge ball, and when pairing up learning the moves which the instructor makes fun for the children.. I know its an childs individual preference of what he/she wants to do, we tried tae-kwon-do and he didnt like it, dont give up try all sports, maybe even girls tag rugby.

Going through a similar thing at the moment but it now seems to be getting sorted out by the school head, though it has taken countless complaining, writing letters, taking photographs of injuries, keeping a diary of events.

Good luck to you all.

veryskint_3

shays_mum wrote: »

Very skint, i have just come across this today, how are things going with you now?, i am having exactly the same problem at the mo, my dd is 6 & same situation with a 'friend' she has known since birth
I had a meeting with the head & all they were worried about was how i addressed a teacher (i was angry!) when i wanted to discuss the problem. Apparantly, they have been covertly keeping an eye on the sitauation & surprise surprise its my daughter who 'excludes' herself from playing with the bully, so i should not be surprised if noone is playing with my dd ( sorry if it makes no sense, i am shaking as i am writing this). I am livid at the school & my so called friend for allowing this to go on, i think i will look into the kupso thing, does anyone have any links for any in London, can't find anything.
I really hope things are getting somewhat better for you, you can always go straight to the local council who take this issue really seriously. Big hugs to you x

Hi sorry to hear about this. But if your daughter is getting bullied then the best thing to do is distance herself from the bully. Does your school not have a sort of buddy system that the older children look after the younger ones if they are alone. Also the teachers should be involving the child at playtime instead of just watching her be miserable.

shays_mum

Hi, things have ebbed & flowed as time has gone on. I really am going to get her into some form of self-defence, she desperately needs to build up some self confidence, then i think that will be the only way she can stand up to the other kids!.
The school were trying to make me feel guilty for bringing up my DD to be a kind, considerate child, they felt she should be more pushy & bolshy to claim her place in the hierarchy......, its sad but there are days she feels the need to keep up with everyone else by being really nasty to her brother .
All i can do is instill the need for confidence with the courage to be her own person, without the need to be like everyone else!.
Think i am talking in circles now!, forgive my random thoughts & thanks to everyone in trying to help me in my trials & tribulations