Daughter getting bullied

Mips

veryskint wrote: »

My daughter has had some major upheavels in her life as her 2 half siblings came to live with us as their mum committed suicide so i think she may be a little scared that i will go and do the same, although we have done loads to try and boost her confidence and the school does too, and the councilling services are arranging some councilling for all of them. But my daughter makes friends so easilly and i think she thinks that when the girl is being ok with her if my daughter tries really hard to be her friend then it will all stop. But as we have told her the best way is to keep well away from her and play with someone else.

Oh bless her

That child does NOT need a vicious bully in her life. NO WAY.

I sincerely hope that this girl does not bully her over her Mum committing suicide.

Worst thing is, kids are so bloody cruel and if you tell them your business they use it against you.

My Sister endured YEARS of bullying. She had a terrible first 5 years in life and was bullied over being too honest about it.

In the end she snapped one day and stood up to the Bullies and nobody could put her down now - ever.

You don't want your girl to snap, but you don't want her victimised either.

School days should be fun.

Dill

What a pity the situation has been allowed to go on for so long. I wonder, could somebody not sit down with this girl who is doing the bullying and speak to her, ask her why she does what she does, and tell her that it's not acceptable, that if she continues to behave the way she does she'll be punished for it. She's still a child but at 8 or 9 she must know that what she is doing is wrong (?)

Your daughter is lucky to have such supportive parents. Many kids go through this without being able to speak to anyone about it.

veryskint_3

alwaysonthego wrote: »

Can they not remove the child and put her in a different class from your daughter. Your daughter has the right to feel safe at school. I think that you need to start by writing to the school (keep a copy, send recorded delivery, cc copy to governers) and ask them what they intend to do about the problem and that you hope it will be rsolved promptly. Give them 14 worknig days to reply.

edit: I would think about taking your daughter to karate/kick boxing, not to be violent but to build up her confidence

Hi thanks for your reply
I did write the school a letter, well...a 2 , A4 page essay. That is when they brought the head of governers in. They told me to leave it in their hands and they would sort it out. But as for the mother telling the school to do anything they can with her, i think she needs to go to parenting classes as she has no control over her kids at all. If mine get told off at school they get told off at home therefore it rarely happens as they dont want to get told off twice.

Mips

veryskint wrote: »

Hi thanks for your reply
I did write the school a letter, well...a 2 , A4 page essay. That is when they brought the head of governers in. They told me to leave it in their hands and they would sort it out. But as for the mother telling the school to do anything they can with her, i think she needs to go to parenting classes as she has no control over her kids at all. If mine get told off at school they get told off at home therefore it rarely happens as they dont want to get told off twice.

I would keep on their backs until your Daughter finally comes home and tells you she has a good day and things are fine for her

veryskint_3

Dippychick wrote: »

Oh bless her

That child does NOT need a vicious bully in her life. NO WAY.

I sincerely hope that this girl does not bully her over her Mum committing suicide.

Worst thing is, kids are so bloody cruel and if you tell them your business they use it against you.

My Sister endured YEARS of bullying. She had a terrible first 5 years in life and was bullied over being too honest about it.

In the end she snapped one day and stood up to the Bullies and nobody could put her down now - ever.

Sorry i didnt explain that well my daughter is mine and my husbands, it was her 2 half siblings mum who died( my hubbys ex wife) although the girl has used it against my stepson saying " your stupid cos your mum commited suicide" and he is nearly 12 so she had to be kept in at playtimes as i think he would have throttled her otherwise. She just doesnt learn. How far does things have to go before kids can be expelled/excluded?

veryskint_3

Dippychick wrote: »

I would keep on their backs until your Daughter finally comes home and tells you she has a good day and things are fine for her

I must admit its not everyday but at least once a week which is bad enough. if it carries on she will have been bullied throughout her infant and junior school. I just wish my daughter would turn round and smack her one.

veryskint_3

Dill wrote: »

What a pity the situation has been allowed to go on for so long. I wonder, could somebody not sit down with this girl who is doing the bullying and speak to her, ask her why she does what she does, and tell her that it's not acceptable, that if she continues to behave the way she does she'll be punished for it. She's still a child but at 8 or 9 she must know that what she is doing is wrong (?)

Your daughter is lucky to have such supportive parents. Many kids go through this without being able to speak to anyone about it.

Hi thanks for your reply. The girl knows exactly what she is doing as with my child its mentally bullying and with others its physical(but really subtle) she is VERY clever and knows exactly what shes doing. In fact her younger brother goes to nursery with my friends child and the mother keeps getting called in there as he is the same and is only 3. So i wonder who is to blame

Titch89

One thing your daughter could do (sounds hard though) is act as though it's not bothering her, then the bully will get bored adn hoefully leave her alone.

I was pretty much bullied through all of secondary school/6th form. The teachers never dealt with it. I remember staying off school one time, because it was so bad. The school phoned up and I said I was getting bullied and they said if I was getting bullied, it would be sorted out. Rubbish - the only reason it stopped happening was because the people in question got suspended.

In 6th form (for some odd reason, both times) I got bullied/picked on. A few days after, the people involved were acting as though it was nothing. I remember one of the girls moaning at me because after she'd stopped bullying me, I refused to talk to her. And to make it worse, I was having some personal problems whilst she was bullying me. (both of which are unrelated)

shellsuit

My friend just had to move her daughter (she is 9) to a different school as she was getting bullied, it went on for 3 years and the teachers did naff all about it. She got kicked, had her hair pulled, was told 'if you tell anyone, my mum will batter yours', 'bring your mums purse into school or ill hit you' etc....now she has moved school though, she is a totally different child.

One girl in my daughters school was bullying another girl ~ the bully stayed in her class and the other girl got moved, how is that right?!

My childminder has just had to move her daughter from her first year at high school to the same school my son goes to, because she was getting physically bullied

Girls these days can be total little biatches.....the stories that my daughter comes home with would make your hair curl, don't get me wrong, she is no angel herself and I've had a good talking to her about a time when she left someone out of her and her friends 'clique'.

When I was a kid, we all played together including the boys, what happened to that??

I've told my daughter that everyone should get along nicely and if she ever sees anyone standing on their own in the playground, that she should ask them if they want to play with her and her friends.

I HATE the idea that some kids are left on their own kicking the gravel when others are having a ball

Now they compete with each other, throw insults at each other and fall out with each other at the drop of a hat, it's so silly!

OP, Can you not write to the education authority and let them know that despite you trying to curb the bullying, nothing at all is being done about it?

veryskint_3

Titch89 wrote: »

One thing your daughter could do (sounds hard though) is act as though it's not bothering her, then the bully will get bored adn hoefully leave her alone.

I was pretty much bullied through all of secondary school/6th form. The teachers never dealt with it. I remember staying off school one time, because it was so bad. The school phoned up and I said I was getting bullied and they said if I was getting bullied, it would be sorted out. Rubbish - the only reason it stopped happening was because the people in question got suspended.

In 6th form (for some odd reason, both times) I got bullied/picked on. A few days after, the people involved were acting as though it was nothing. I remember one of the girls moaning at me because after she'd stopped bullying me, I refused to talk to her. And to make it worse, I was having some personal problems whilst she was bullying me. (both of which are unrelated)

i understand wher your coming from but when the other girl is telling people not to be her friend and making kids take sides who are scared of her then its very difficult.