Advice on Potty training

Pepzofio

Reward chart? Sticker for every day she manages without any accidents, with a toy/treat she's been after at the end of the chart. Negotiate the reward at the beginning and draw up the chart together - keep the first chart fairly short so she sees the benefits before she loses interest, then gradually make charts longer and/or start to introduce other tasks/challenges once she is completely potty trained. Make a big fuss of her for being a 'clever girl' each time she gets a sticker, especially at the start.

We've done this for DS with eating vegetables, as he's a very fussy eater and it worked a treat. We've just added 'tidying up at nursery' coz he was getting a bit lazy with it and he's already showing an improvement.

andrealm

Thanks,we've tried all the usual things, she gets a sweet after every success and was promised a reward if she could go all day without any accidents, but at some point she always gets distracted and wets herself. I've asked her and she says she knew she needed to go but was too busy. I dread taking her out now, we have training pants for her(cloth pants, not pull ups) but I just don't know what to do with her. I feel as though I'm the only one with this problem, other children seem to get it in a couple of weeks. I don't see other people at toddler groups having to run after their children and having so many accidents.
Taking her out is so stressful but I really don't want to stay in all the time and she's got to learn to stop what's she's doing and go to the toilet when she's out.

PrincessPlaty

Im having the same problems with DD2 at the moment.

Doesnt seem to matter what i try she still seems to have accidents, to me i dont think she is ready

So far this morning she has had 2 accidents and only one successful trip to the toilet ~ she wont sit on the potty at all and have tried several different ones with her :rolleyes:

Luckily the pre school that i found her were quite happy to take them if they werent clean as they apparently take them from 18 months anyway.

I cant really offer any advice but i do know how you feel

flea72

a child does not have to be potty trained to go to pre-school. by stating they have to be, they are discriminating against children who are not (think it falls under disability laws)

you would be surprised at the number of children who start primary school, that are not fully dry during the day (even higher numbers for not dry at night), and attend school still wearing pull-up pants, and not being able to take themselves to the loo - i think the average age for a child to be totally dry, is 7yrs, so dont worry, your DD has a long way to go yet

Politely tell the pre-school that they are breaking the law by not letting your child attend, and that you will be contacting their governing body

Flea

PrincessPlaty

flea72 wrote: »

i think the average age for a child to be totally dry, is 7yrs, so dont worry, your DD has a long way to go yet

Wow i didnt know that :eek: DD1 was dry day and night just before her 3rd birthday never had an accident :j

Guess i should let DD2 do it when she is ready and not be comparing her to DD1

kjrv72

I agree with Flea, is the preschool attached to a school?, if so contact the chair of governors.

At my DD1s school there are still children in reception not fully clean. In fact they have just brought a nappy disposal unit thingy.

What worked for my dd was a sticker chart and not leaving the house 3 days. She still wont poo in the potty though :mad:

onlyroz

Bribery does work. Try giving a reward for just using the toilet whether they go or not. Something small like a couple of smarties or M&Ms. And a bigger reward for doing a poo.

To be totally dry by age 7 does seem to be quite old though. My boy is four and has only had one accident in about six months...

andrealm

PP, how old is your DD? I don't think I would be so worried is she was a bit younger but I think she is stubborn and would have been happy to stay in nappies forever given the chance, she doesn't care if she is wet and would have happily sat in a dirty nappy as well. She would say she didn't need changed when we knew she did. I think she is as ready now as she'll ever be, she knows when she needs to go and will take herself off most of the time but just doesn't want to stop what she's doing and go to the toilet.

Flea I'm annoyed that the school try to do this, surely they must know that
they're breaking the law? I shouldn't have to fight with them over this. I've not heard of any preschools in my area that are happy to take untrained children, presumably if challenged they have to admit them but they certainly don't seem keen to, and if they do they ask for parents to come in and change them.

Pepzofio

When we trained DS, first few days he got sat on toilet regularly whether he needed/wanted to or not (i.e. when he got up, after meals, whenever he started jigging and every couple of hours in between!) He complained a lot, but it did work.

He also tends to have the odd accident when he's engrossed in something else, and gives us the whole 'I don't need to' spiel if we prompt him, but now if he looks like he needs to go we just make him! He almost always does something, then we make a bit of a joke of it, saying "See, I TOLD you you needed to go!"

PrincessPlaty

andrea she has only just turned 3 and what you have described of your DD describes her to a tea she is quite happy sitting in a dirty nappy and telling me she doesnt need changing when i can smell her a mile off :rolleyes::rotfl: