Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Savvy_sewing

Well I have had a whirl wind change around. :j
After a lot of discusion with all of my children, Biggest of Mooloo included, the family have decided that we shall look to move out of Oxford and back to Towcester/area, where the family lives. i.e. Biggest of Mooloo's and my parents. Also my best friend lives there.
I had a family meeting last night, and even though it means DS will have to change his schooling so late into the GCSE's he would rather change then stay where he is. (As we are not expecting great marks for him anyway, it could actually be a change for the better?) I need to contact the school. I did try but got an answere machine today.
I went to see my parents and discussed it with them. To all concerned they believe that if I give in to my ailments, and stay home, that I can over see the babies and the girls better, and that if I take on the part of the main carer at home, then as both the girls want to try to work then there are plenty of oportunites for them to find part time work.:T
I have investigated the amount of Housing Benefit allowances I would be able to expect, and they will allow me to look at a rent of up to £1325 which is a bit lower then here in oxford, but the value of properties there are a lot lower.
My parents and I found a place on the internet and rang up, an hour later we were looking at a house not far from them, which was amazing. I would be payiing £300 less rent a month for a much better standard of house, with garage, with parking and with an ensuite too!!
Obviously this will not be plain sailing and because of my bankruptcy I may get a big fat NO> But we will put our names back on the council list and we will start the ball rolling to see if we can get something the same, or similar eventually.:eek:
There will be a lot of problems and its not going to be straight forward, but I hope that now the decision to move has been made that the family will be happier near their old friends, we have my family nearer for support, and I have decided that I cannot carry on working and stressing. I have been teetering on the knife edge of breakdown for far too long. As I am alergic to the antidepressants, I cant take that risk.:eek: :eek:
I have seen my BF today, and told him what we are planning. Of course it has come as a big shock to him, but I hope that he will realise that it is for the sake of the whole family, and that I will still have the car and be able to come to him at weekends etc, and he could also come to me, where ever I do end up, its only 45mins or so away.
I wait now to see if everything will calm down and we can make the right steps to move the family and sort the problems at home out.
I have mentioned it to Social Worker A, and told her what we are planning. She told me that they had had a meeting without me, either today or yesterday I cant remember, she said that the other ladies that have been coming are finding working with the girls hard and frustrating..(Tell me about it),:rolleyes: and that they were thinking that they may argue too much and one would walk out, and they would then fear for the baby.
I have said that I am going to take over the house and be the carer of the babies too. That if I am at home, hopefully I can keep it clean and tidy, and I can ensure the environment for them is a healthier one. Yes it means I may be doing more, but hopefully as i havent the hard work of the job, that my health will improve and we can progress better.
Who knows. But its the beginning of a new adventure for us all, and i hope the life line that we will need to pull this family out of the mess that we are currently in.:T

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo have PM'd you.

Well done on all the decisions I am really pleased for you, the relief of the decision comes across between the lines of your post.

Also if your DS is embarrassed starting a new school at this point some colleges allow then to start younger and give them support to redo their GCSE's also. Just a thought.

I really hope this is a better time for you, you deserve it.

KM x

Seaxwyn

Wow, big decisions Mooloo. You sound very relieved. I hope things will get easier for all of you, that DS settles well into his new school and the twins find work. How soon do you think you can move?

MiniLaura

this is all sounds really positive! I hope you manage to get things movin and if you are under less stress it can only be good!

Surfbabe

What a positive posting Mooloo - I hope all your plans work out - if anyone deserves it you do.

Savvy_sewing

I dont know how soon it will happen, if I didnt have the bankrupcy it would be within the month. But I have doubts that I will manage to get us through the credit checks to be able to get the house I want at the moment. I may need a guarantour but I dont know anyone that could be that.
Although the idea is good, the theory may be a long time to put into practice.
I will continue to post and let you know, and no doubt ask millions of questions. There is so much to think about.
My BF is also gone away to think. Currently he has taken it as a snub on him I think. But that was not my intention. Maybe I have read his signals wrong.? I hope so.
Time to go to work, for a little while longer. Assistant has day off today so there is nobody else to go in. But I will be making an appointment with my doctor to see if he will sign me off as he said before. As I am unable to carry on the way things were. The stress is far too much. Having had a nervous breakdown before, I see the signs and they are so upon me, that the drastic action is necessary.

shaz_mum_of__2

My first post on here and not really sure how to put this

I feel very humbled at the love and care you have shown for your family in what are obviously very difficult circumstances,you make my life look simple

I too am a bankrupt (now dishcharged ) and have found myself better off than before i know its not the ame for everyone though.I was lucky in that before my business went under my hubby to be and i didn't live together so i didn't lose my home

I also have a neck problem ,still waiting for official diagnosis of spondylitis though ,i take Gabapentin too which i really hate as it makes me "fuzzy" my DS age 17 keeps asking me if im on drugs:rotfl:

How you cope with your daily sruggle is inspiring

Keep it up and if the BF is right for you he will come round!!

Shaz

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo wrote: »

As I am unable to carry on the way things were. The stress is far too much. Having had a nervous breakdown before, I see the signs and they are so upon me, that the drastic action is necessary.

I am SO glad that you learned enough from your past experience of a break down to be able to recognise the signs and prevent it happening again. That is why I am sure all those that love you are SO pleased you made this decision. Well done its obvious it was not an easy decision but the alternative could/would have been much worse and were would you all be then so for what its worth I think you have made the right decision.

Take care of yourself
KM x

Savvy_sewing

I have had to call in the reinforcements at work. I couldntdo it. I have come home. Too much overload I suppose.
The gabapentin used to make me fuzzy. Still does at times, but now its built up to 3 x 300mg 3 x a day. If I stop taking it it makes me fuzzy!! How does that work.
I have been to the doctor today. I had to take a break, overload hit. He has said its not surprising and signed me off for 2 weeks. He is going to see if he can organise some councilling for me.
I am exhausted.
DS has not gone to college today, said he was sick, but is driving me mad on the Xbox which is plugged in in my little sittingroom, as thats the only TV it works on.
So no peace in here at the moment.
Think I will retire to my bedroom and see if there is something mundane on the TV for a while. See how I feel later about facing the rest of the troubles.
Want to get back on focus about the idea and loggistics of moving asap.
But it wont be today.

Savvy_Sue

Sorry, but if he isn't well enough to be in college, DS isn't well enough to be on the X-box! :rotfl:

At least, in my house he wouldn't be well enough for the X-box until he'd at least done some washing up for me ...

Glad things are looking up. Just making the decision is a good thing. Now, one step at a time.