Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Errata

I really hesitated commenting about the time the baby was fed, but it does need sorting out if it's to make a good transition to solids. Good news the twins can do housework if they have someone other than you organising them.
And really good news that social services seem to have woken up at last to your unique situation.

SuziQ

So glad your son just reieved a nasty shock Mooloo. Let's hope he really takes it to heart and learn from it.

With regards to braces,they changed the rules last year and now there has to be a considerable problem to get a brace on the nhs (my son is deemed not bad enough even though his are worse than my daughters were who was treated.) If he has been referred on by a dentist though there is a good chance he will get nhs treatment.

Js_Other_Half

So relieved that things seems to be improving.

As the others have said, boys do seem to have tendency to get into trouble - at least he was scared - so he won't be keen to get into trouble again!

Savvy_sewing

Sadly coming back into the house about 30 mins ago, you would not believe that there had been some improvement here last night.! Nobody had done anything significant at all. All 3 were sitting in the sittingroom/kitchen with the same amount of mess all around them. There is still an air of if nobody is coming them we arent rushing. When I said isnt Social Worker D due today there was a debate and then there is now a flurry of movement, and blame going on.
I just told all of them to Cancel any plans that they may have wanted/or made for this weekend, as I am cancelling all options!
Then come into my sitting room to speak to the school, and read my emails etc.
Had a quick chat on MSN with my Mum, and now its time to get ready to take DS to the dentist.
I did arrange to pay the fine over 3 installments, starting on Monday when I get my Tax credits. (then I thought about the money paid me the otherday, and thought perhaps I should have used that?) But as no interest to pay on the installments I am leaving it like that.
Now its time to get moving. Still feel exhausted and so drained!!

Savvy_sewing

Well the dentist said that DS doesnt need braces afterall, he just needs to try to look after the ones hes got as they cnnot see any molars in his XRay. He will need to go back to our own dentist and get Rootcanal work etc done and quite a few fillings. But no brace.
The twins did clear up for the Social Worker, I was not here when she came but it is still reasonably clear still.
On the way back from the dentist we were parked next to a Tesco so I did a shop in there while I had DS to carry and push the trolley etc. But I didnt have a list or my menu plans done, so I overspent by quite a bit. Now I have quite a lot of shopping I will have to really watch the rest of the shopping for the month.
Must go and update my signature.
Cooking tea so I also need to go and check I havent burned it!!

Biggest*of*Mooloos

BF is home, Surgury on Tuesday. day off Holiday. Going to Cambridge to see BF mate as he was tranferred thee yesterday. Hope DS is ok x let him know that im here, Tried to call earlier but no luck - cooking dinner for the invalid lol

Savvy_sewing

hope to be able to visit Biggest of Mooloos tomorrow. taking twin1, both babies and DS. Invited BF first, but when he heard kids coming he declined. No chance to integrate both my life with him, and my life with my family if he will not join us. Tonight I am at my house, when usually I would be dashing across town to be with him. My sons problems brought it home to me that I am the one doing all the running. Its time that I was appreciated all around. I cant keep splitting myself up between the two houses, if its not returned. Why should my kids loose out, all I want is to share it all. I am deeply unhappy at the moment.
Twin2 has gone away for the weekend andleft us with the baby even though I didnt want her to go. She persuaded her sister to look after the baby, but of course I cant leave her to do it. (Well I will sit back, but be here if needed). As I dont want to undermind twin1. I must let her do as much as she feels she can. I am quite amazed at the difference in her since Social Worker C has been involved in the last 10 days ish.
Tonight I am ready for bed. Night all.

FROSTYFRECKLE

Hi Mooloo,

Your last post made me very sorry for you - all you want is a family who are whole and your BF does not seem to want to join in. Is your BF overwhelmed by the problems your children have been having lately, maybe he feels he cannot help you - he is not the dad - can he give them into trouble for playing up, can he say no and they will listen? When things are calmer perhaps you will see your BF does want to be a part in your family - you've got a holiday coming up soon and hopefully the flare up in the problems you have been experiencing will have calmed down. Your BF has been there through thick and thin, he must love you to bits (trying not be be sexist but..) most men would probably run a mile to having a long term relationship with a woman, four kids, 2 of which have learning disabilities, bankruptcy etc etc. There are lots of good men out there and I think you have a goodie. There is an icon for a dodgy hug which I would send if I could find it, so can someone else send Mooloo a dodgy hug from all of MSE.

PS Hope Biggest of Mooloos BF is getting better (dodgy hug to Biggest of Mooloos as well) PPS I think you need to be kinder to yourself Mooloo - you do a brilliant job holding everything together but you are hard on yourself.

Keeping_Motivated

Hi Mooloo I must admit I did think given all your problems/stress that it did seem to be you doing all the running re your relationship however I would not have mentioned it as it is none of my business and also because sometimes on a forum we can't get the full picture, however as you have brought it up I do agree with you it seems you will always have 2 separate lives if your BF does not integrate himself more. I guess you don't need him to be a dad to them however I think what would help is if he at least came to yours so you are around if anyone needs you. I agree with Frostyfreckle he must love you to bits...no one is forcing him to be with you its obviously his choice but he is maybe shying away from the chaos at yours and in some ways who can blame him but this is not about the kids this is about YOU and I hope he realises that although you are strong you are struggling and you 'need' him to step up to the plate at the moment.
It has shone through all through this thread how much you truly love him so I hope he recognises that you need him to do a little more at the moment.

Take care
x

MiniLaura

It sounds as if Twin 1 is doing ok at the moment and things may go well for her in the future if she is trying and supported correctly? That sounds really positive. Is your DS almost ready to leave school/start FE/HE or working? As it sounds like the pressue from them may only be for a short term and something to look forward to in the future where they both may be more independant?

It also sounds like both you and your BF have families at home to look after and it may be fairer to both make the effort to visit/spend time with each others families instead of it being one sided? (ive also kinda picked up BF children are younger and may not be able to leave them alone overnight?)

I hope things keep improving for you!