Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

SuziQ

Mooloo I am so sorry and can only pray that this time the ss will do as they promised and SUPPORT you properly.
You and your son are the victims in this,both of you have had your lives turned upside down by your attempts to sort your girls out.

He has obviously suffered through all of this. I know that my middle child often feels sidelined as his sister has been in counselling and has been doing A levels this year-so needed my support. My youngest is Autistic-so ALWAYS needs my support. I know he feels that his needs come last most of the time-you are not the only parent to feel ridiculously guilty and inept so please don't be too hard o yourself,but you do need to prioritise him now or he will be a real casualty. He sounds bright and could have a good future-the SS lack of support means he is being dragged down to a level where he can't possibly achieve his potential-you could and should tell them that thi is in direct contravntion of the Children Act-I will try and find the relevant quote for you.

Js_Other_Half

<hugs>

The reason people don't know what to tell you, is that they don't know what they're allowed to give you! They all have very constrained budgets, with limited options, and they're often overruled by their managers.

Hence take the advice of contacting your MP or a solicitor asap.

SuziQ

I haven't got the concentration to o through the whol document Mooloo as my 2 boys are screamimg and trying to kill one another at the moment,are you seeing the solicitor again and is he familiar with the children act?
From my experience SS are terrified of being taken to court over failure to deliver service as it's the people at the top who get the kick for it-which they hate. Time to get extremely pushy and to threat legal action/involvement of MP press whatever.

http://www.everychildmatters.gov.uk/deliveringservices/integratedworking/


‘Every child matters’
The duty on agencies to safeguard and promote children’s welfare, Section 11 of the Children Act 2004,should help ensure safeguarding and promoting children’s welfare becomes everyone’s business.
A central part of the Every Child Matters: Change for Children programme is addressing the weaknesses in how we work together including with children, young people and their parents and carers. We know that the picture on working together is inconsistent. Too much is dependent on local relationships and there is too little implementation of what we know is good practice.

I think that paragraph sumes it up really!

SS are really doing *ugger all and you are being left to try to keep this ship afloat in constant storms. I believe-from my experience of how they work-that they are holding back due to budgetery constraints and will only pull the rabbit out of the hat if 'forced' to-which is where I feel a strongly worded letter from a solicitor dealing with these issues comes in.

There is a human rights issue here and they are ltting you down so badly.

Savvy_sewing

Has shouting again worked I wonder? There is another lady just been on the telephone wanting to know about my twin1. (At last), she is coming to see us NOW. So I am expecting her any minute, as her office is only 10 minute walk away. So no excuses. Have cancelled my plans to go out, and get the shopping.
I wonder if they will act, or just listen.
The worker that came becuase of twin2 and BBJ was late, but she has taken notes of what we said, and is going to see the Main Social Worker, and see what will be next. She asked me if we could try to carry on with the help of the assistant coming in 2 mornings a week, and review it in 4 weeks time at the babies case conference. I said that I will try to carry on, but that they MUST look into the options available to us, as I am already slipped over the edge, and an mid the colapse, not teatering on the edge.!
So that will be the third social worker talking to me today......
Not that I expect anything to happen miraculously.
I will try to focus my self on the needs of the twins today, but I have told everyone, that DS is suffering too. He is currently here so I am hoping that he will reiterate what we said last night and this morning. It is imperative that he is supported and not allowed to get lost in the gaps in the net this time. Blow the funding!!!

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo wrote: »

Has shouting again worked I wonder? There is another lady just been on the telephone wanting to know about my twin1. (At last), she is coming to see us NOW. So I am expecting her any minute, as her office is only 10 minute walk away. So no excuses. Have cancelled my plans to go out, and get the shopping.
I wonder if they will act, or just listen.
The worker that came becuase of twin2 and BBJ was late, but she has taken notes of what we said, and is going to see the Main Social Worker, and see what will be next. She asked me if we could try to carry on with the help of the assistant coming in 2 mornings a week, and review it in 4 weeks time at the babies case conference. I said that I will try to carry on, but that they MUST look into the options available to us, as I am already slipped over the edge, and an mid the colapse, not teatering on the edge.!
So that will be the third social worker talking to me today......
Not that I expect anything to happen miraculously.
I will try to focus my self on the needs of the twins today, but I have told everyone, that DS is suffering too. He is currently here so I am hoping that he will reiterate what we said last night and this morning. It is imperative that he is supported and not allowed to get lost in the gaps in the net this time. Blow the funding!!!

Mooloo :A You're amazing, keep going you'll get there in the end with your determination. I know you are weakening but its obvious that were your child and grandchildren are concerned you will draw strength from somewhere til you ALL are in a safer place emotionally and physically.
I'll say it again you're amazing and at the end of today treat yourself to something/anything and just 'breathe'. :A

Savvy_sewing

Hello, I am emotionally worn out. I have explained the situation three times today now.
Twin1 has sat in my sitting room with the new duty social worker, Think I am going to have to give them letters or I will get them all mixed up!. So I will call her worker C.!
She has listened to my story, she has talked with others about our situation. She has listened to twin1, who this time actually admitted that she was struggling with everything. She opened up quite a bit to her. The result is that the SW C, has said that she will be refereing twin1 to the "floating Support" team. (Never heard of them before.). They will make arrangements for twin1 to help her sort out her finances, to get he on the right track, and she said it will be like having her own personal CAB, to help her sort out what ever she is able to have, and to help her structure her life better.
SW C also said that she will be arriving unannounced to visit twin1 and she will be going upstairs to check her room and the conditions that she and the baby are in.
If what she says is going to happen for twin1 then hopefully there will be a few changes around here now.
If the twins start to improve, and I can concentrate of getting the help for DS that he also needs then I hope we will manage to live in a bit more harmony instead of anarchy!!.
If everyone does what they have said today, there will be miracles afoot.... Well maybe not miracles, but there is hope that things will change to some degree.
Twins and DS have now gone to get the basic shopping that we/they need for the next few days, etc and DS needs socks for school as I cant find any pairs anywhere!.
I just want to say thankyou to everyone that has supported me so far. Without this thread I would have sunk into dispare a long time ago.
I am feeling a lot more optomistic now that I have seen SW C. I just hope that things will indeed happen now.
I am treating myself to a cup of tea while it is quiet. No TV, no gamestations, nothing but the noise of the road. (Unfortuantely thats *loody loud!!).

SuziQ

Fantastic news Mooloo-well done you,your tenacity has finally paid off!

I will pray that THIS TIME they will all stick to what they have agreed (including the Twins!)

Savvy_sewing

Right, I am off for the evening to visit my BF, I think I deserve a bit of "us" time now.
Everyone is home, they have decided on Sausages for tea, they can cook them.
I am going to relax, I hope, and have my batteries regenerated ready for work for the rest of the week.
Thanks to everyone for helping support me. I will keep you all posted as to how I manage to get on. My fingers are crossed that this time things will get done.

Savvy_sewing

Well I have been rushed off of my feet all day. I have felt a bit like a whirling dervish,. there was so much stuff going on today. But there has been a big change in the shop so I am satisfied that I worked hard, and that the staff all worked hard for me.
Social Worker A telephoned me today to tell me that she has put in the referral for help for my son. She has spoken to the school and they are expecting a meeting with me next week. Thats a bit strange when I rang I got an answer machine and nobody got back to me?
Anyway the wheels are starting to turn. I hope that they turn somewhat faster then they have been of late!.
When I got home the place did not look as though social worker/help lady D, had been here for an hour and a half. Twins said that she "talked" to them, but no action. Lists of things to do, but nothing had been done.
I think I still had the energy from work, or was it the anger of the place being Yuk, that I started to clear off the sides and blitz the kitchen. I went to cook the dinner, (they didnt bother with the sausages yesterday), so I used the sausages and some oven chips. DS seems a bit more upbeat today, and he has brought home a friend for the night. So while I was cooking dinner we all got smoked out!!! The girls musthave spilt something in the oven and it wasnt wiped up.
So I will have to clean the oven when I get home tomorrow, before I cook again. (How embarassing that was!!).
I am just popping over to the September Grocery side now to update my purchases from the Co-op. Got some meat on reduced when I went this morning on the way to work.

Savvy_sewing

Morning, its early for me to be on here. Set my alarm for same time, but didnt go back to sleep as normal. Dosed a little, but set my teasmade and had a cup of tea nearly ready not so long after the first alarm. Woke DS and his mate to get ready to go to school. Bad news is that DS has left his bike at his mates (and mine) and now its been about 5 weeks I havent seen the bikes. I think they have gone and he wont tell me.
He has said that it costs him £4 a day on the bus to get to school, so thats another £20 a week to find, on top of the cost of the more expensive lunches, noboby in year 11 take sandwiches.... Right, So its going to cost me about £15 for lunches for him. (if I give him the cost of the cheapest Panini and a drink!!). So there is £35 a week more to find that I hadnt budgeted properly for.
He used to take sandwiches (if I made them) and he used to ride the bike unless it was very wet.
What with the council rough calculation being around £300 out, and I have to now pay back £830.00 ish not £700 as the man suggested, and that the amount of rent will be also nearer £700 a month to find and not £587 as calculated last week, I am coming into despair.
Twin2 had a visit yesterday from the lady that signed her up to sell Ann Summers. I tried to ask a lot of questions to find out how deep Twin is in, but its too late, she is signed up, been given a kit, well rented a kit, and has already placed an order just short of £300!!! Eek. I am too late to stop her.
I asked her how she intended to pay for her order, and she said it will come out of the commission she will earn...NO IT WONT. If she doesnt pay for the first order she wont get the rest!! And how can you order things on the hope that you get the commission in future sales.!!
I also had a letter from the Department of works and pensions addressed to me, telling me I had to pay back £441. that twin1 was over paid in income support in 2006/2007 (when she was living in the hostel). When I rang to ask why they are billing me, they said that I was in control of her money... HELLO NO I AM NOT. Then when I asked how they came to the money they decided to refuse to talk to me.
SOLICITOR TIME FOR HER NOW? God is it never ending.
Money will be the death of me thats for sure.