Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Ellidee

Oh Mooloo I'm so glad that you have decided NOT to stop posting. Have been thinking about you and wondering how you are. Look forward to hearing your latest news when you have time. Take care X

Savvy_sewing

Got five minutes until the dinner is ready. So I thought I would put some thoughts down while I am feeling positive.
Had the meeting with Social on Thursday, a busy day. Nothing really new came of it, except that Twin2's BF was trying to push for her to go to a mother and baby unit, so that he could see her there, but she doesnt want to go. Said she would rather be with me even though its over crowded. (Think she is getting disilusioned with him). He said he didnt know how to live a normal life, and that if they were together he would find it easier. Baby is still or at risk register as the problems that happened over christmas were highlighted by the case worker, and the fact that he hasnt done anything to help himself even kick the canabis etc.
So access is at the Sure Start place, and thats only Wed to Friday. He moans that I am doing it, but its not my doing.
They said that they will look into the housing again, and compile a letter to housing for exceptional cercumstances. But are still not hopefull that I will get a council property. So they are saying that they are going to see if the council will give me a promise that once the need for the larger accommodation is nolonger that the council would take me back on to public sector accommodation. If I go to private accommodation they will assist with a gaurantee for the bond. Not sure what that means exactly.
I would need housing benefit to help with the cost as private renting is extausionate. Been looking and its around £1400 a month for a very basic coronation street style terraced house, with yard. and then there is the rates and the parking permits, etc etc to deal with.

Savvy_sewing

I have had a huge amount of support from DBF, I think that the arguement aired a few things that neither of us had really realised were issues between us, and we are broaching subjects togther better. We had a wonderful meal on Wednesday, and talked properly about the things that were getting us down, and pushing us apart. He spent time looking at the houses and the rental market with me on Friday. We spent most of the weekend together and he has helped me brainstorm the pros and cons of moving and that helped considerably.

Ellidee

It's good to hear you sounding more positive Mooloo and also that your relationship with your dbf is better.

Savvy_sewing

Ellidee wrote: »

It's good to hear you sounding more positive Mooloo and also that your relationship with your dbf is better.

Thanks. I cant stay down forever. Its not in my nature. But sometimes life is just a bit rocky.
Still plenty of hurdles to cross yet unfortunately.
I am expecting my parents and my sister to pop in as they are driving past. sister lives in France so havent seen her in 18months or more. Just a flying visit as she has just become a granny again. Hence her visit to good old blighty.
Not sure where everyone will sit.
dinner over. Need to go and do the dishes out of the way and get that bread recipe I got off of the website on.
Will be negotiating with work to see if there is anyway I can be the manager without having to do the lifting side of things. Then I may be able to go back to work part time. That would be good for me. And twin2 and twin1 can help each other for a few hours a day. Things look like they will progress.

Seaxwyn

HI Mooloo. £1400 does sound extortionate, are you sure that's right? My brother rents a nice 3-bed house in Cowley for much less than that. Shall I ask him where it was advertised? His landlord is really nice too.

Glad to hear you have cleared the air with your BF. I'm sure if he reads this thread it will only increase his respect for you. You are only airing your frustrations and sharing your thoughts. Nothing wrong with that.

Very glad you are going to keep posting.

Savvy_sewing

Seaxwyn wrote: »

HI Mooloo. £1400 does sound extortionate, are you sure that's right? My brother rents a nice 3-bed house in Cowley for much less than that. Shall I ask him where it was advertised? His landlord is really nice too.

Glad to hear you have cleared the air with your BF. I'm sure if he reads this thread it will only increase his respect for you. You are only airing your frustrations and sharing your thoughts. Nothing wrong with that.

Very glad you are going to keep posting.

Yes I am sure it was £1400. The others that were available were even higher than that. I need at least 4 bedrooms,so that the girls can have a room each as well. (they still will have to have the babies with them), It would be good if you can ask your brother, cos the nearest I could find in Temple Cowley were around £1600 to £1800 a calander month. they also want 1 and 1/2 months rent as a bond up front too. Thats for a 6 month let. I really want a longer let than that as well. I would prefere to live the otherside of town if possible for DS school is in Marston.
Re DBF, I hope that he does start to understand why I am on here. But as he is quite a quiet kind of person, who is very private the thought of being on here is alien to his way of thinking. Me I can chat to most people anytime. Hence running a pub for so many years before I suppose. And working in a shop until now.

Savvy_sewing

My parents and my sister came, were here for about 20 mins then had to go. My sister got to see my two grandchildren and I got to see pictures of her newest arrival. Also so good to see her, she looks incredibly well considering all her operations etc on her spine. Shes a nice golden brown too. Makes me pale into insignificance. Also looks younger than me, although she is going to be 50 this year! I will have to look around for ways to get rid of my stress out of my face. I look about 10 years older than she does. Its not fair. Temper stamp here.
Looking at the grocery challenge. I am not going to make it. My provisional Mr T order is over £100. But I know that I probably have enough stuff then to take me through to mid February, if I stop being lazy and get cooking.
As I was once in catering I should be better at making the food work for me, not me work for the food.
Posting on Hypno, and I have decided that perhaps I ought to put down the savings that I have for my car to be repaired, or replaced and the money I am saving to get my son an exbox360.
So I will update my signature with that. As I cannot get into debt again, being a bankrupt. Its down to saving.
The search for the houses are getting me down. Who can afford such high rental prices? More than I was earning in a month when I was at work, now I am on the sick? Impossible. I would have to rely on housing benefits. Is there anywhere in oxford thats reasonably priced?

Savvy_Sue

Mooloo wrote: »

If I go to private accommodation they will assist with a gaurantee for the bond. Not sure what that means exactly.

What they are saying, I think, is that they will supply the deposit if you go into private rented. You said Oxford, and I found this on your local council website. You could check that's what they meant next time you have to talk to someone, and also make sure you are working through their 'process' correctly.

Savvy_sewing

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

What they are saying, I think, is that they will supply the deposit if you go into private rented. You said Oxford, and I found this on your local council website. You could check that's what they meant next time you have to talk to someone, and also make sure you are working through their 'process' correctly.[/quote

Thankyou. I believe that this was what they are on about, I have to find a property first then they will guarantee to cover costs on leaving that they then recharge to me. they dont put actual money up front,.