Mooloo's struggle with babies and bills

Surfbabe

Gosh Mooloo - I really don't know how you do it - but I think you are right to leave it all for them - after all they are grown up and with responsibilities even if they do have difficulties. Enjoy your wine and New Tricks - recharge your batteries for tomorrow - steely quiet works wonders rather than huge shouting matches. Good Luck

Savvy_sewing

Surfbabe wrote: »

Gosh Mooloo - I really don't know how you do it - but I think you are right to leave it all for them - after all they are grown up and with responsibilities even if they do have difficulties. Enjoy your wine and New Tricks - recharge your batteries for tomorrow - steely quiet works wonders rather than huge shouting matches. Good Luck

The problem is that I dont do it anymore. I am worn out, and I have told them till I am blue in the face that I am not well, that I should not be working as far as the doctor has said. Perhaps I should be sneaky tomorrow and tell them that I have given up work (well for 2 days anyway), and see whether that would shock them???? Oh I am not sure I would be able to tell a porky pie, I can think it, but actually tell it?
I have no energy today to argue to be honest. Perhaps that is why they think they can get away with it.
They are still out, and I am getting worried about the babies now.
They have been out most of the day as far as I can make out.?
DS has popped up on the MSN and I have told him to be home in the morning as I have had enough of the mess.

SuziQ

Mooloo I don't think your threats to show the SS the pictures will work unles they know you are not going to protect them from the ss any more.A it is they are never in trouble apart from the occasional minor rant from you,are they? I hate to think of you having to hide away from their mess,but thank heavens you have that room to retreat too!
Hope you have a good night's sleep and they get their *rses in gear tomorrow!

Savvy_sewing

well I really am struggling. Twin 2 didnt get home until nearly 10pm and she and her baby went to bed nearly straight away. Twin1 never even came home. When I rang her some stranger answered her phone, said that she was asleep. She only just spoke to me a few minutes ago, when I rang her to remind her to be on the 8.25 bus back. She said she has no money and has lost her bank card, so she wont be back until after the bank opens, then its the hourly bus out of the place. I went bolistic at her and lost my rag. I am so stressed out. I really dont know if what I am doing is good enough, or right anymore.? I am in tears for loosing my temper, and shouting at her to get home, I threatened to apply for custody of her baby as I didnt know what else to do. Basically I am so scared. Becuase I cannot cope, does that mean that I am about to destroy my whole family??

Seaxwyn

No you are not about to destroy your family. Don't feel bad about losing your temper Mooloo.

You are not the problem - you are the one who is doing most to keep the family together, the babies well cared for etc. NOBODY could cope any better than you. I think you have a tendency to blame yourself and that's not right - you are doing all that is humanly possible.

Please please tell the social services that you can't cope and if the situation stays the same you will have a breakdown. And don't think that's because you're weak - it's not.

Is there anyone who could attend the meeting with the social worker with you to back you up? I wish I was nearby so I could come along and give you some moral support.

Savvy_sewing

I have just spent 15 minutes on the phone to social telling them that I need support, that i have had enough, and that i cannot cope anymore. I am in tears, and I cant seem to stop crying. I really have lost the plot. I know that it has been building, but today just feels unsurmountable.

Seaxwyn

You poor thing Mooloo, I'm sure all your diary readers are feeling for you now and wishing we could give you a hug. Do you think the person at social services realised the seriousness of what you were saying?

This is a low point and things will get better.

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo go to your doctors and ask for counselling, also look in the yellow pages or internet and look for any local voluntary counselling services to put your name down too. You NEED someone to talk to with this, maybe family is not enough and if you have had a break down in the past (not saying you will have another) you need to make sure this time that you are supported enough.

Your posts are OBVIOUS you are crying/screaming out for some support/help and you are not coping. This does not make you weak this actually makes you 'real'. Whatever happens with the twins you need someone to talk to you can't carry on mentally like you are never mind physically.

Please go today I am worried about you.

KM x

MiniLaura

I really hope they listen to you and get you some help. You havent lost the plot - just had far too much placed on you. Hope to hear better news soon!

Savvy_sewing

Well she will have thought that I am an emotional wreck. Typically our alloted person is on holiday still. I cant wait for her to get back, I had to let it all pour out. Yes I feel weak. I feel as though I have just doomed my children and that I may be responsible for them possibly loosing the babies into foster care. That thought is scaring me to death. But at the same time, I am exhausted, emotionally, physically and not far off financially.