Money Moral Dilemma: Should my partner contribute more to household bills as he works from home?

MSE_Kelvin

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

I work part-time from my workplace and look after our child one day a week to save on childcare costs. My partner works full-time from home, using two computers, cooking food and having the lights and heating on as required. He contributes more towards bills than I do, as I reduced my hours, and therefore pay, to care for our child, but I think he should contribute even more, as he uses much more energy, water and so on than I do. Should I ask him to pay more?

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turnitround

I swear some people have no idea of the meaning of the word partner.  How does a relationship in which you were secure enough to bring children into the world turn into a business transaction. Mutual support is everything in a relationship and quibbling about should my partner pay more is not conducive to a happy relationship. 
Perhaps look at it another way. He is lucky to be able to work from home as it cuts down on travel costs and wear and tear on a vehicle.
This sounds like 2 children arguing about who has the most chips on thier plate.

CSI_Yorkshire

Clearly.

You should be sure to individually account for each individual action, each consumable item, the number of times each of you flushes the toilet etc.  In fact, you should probably also start tracking how much of each packet or tin of food each of you consumes in case that isn't equal too.

After all, nothing says 'partner' like comprehensive and accurate domestic accounting.

Kerreh

Is there a bet on @ MSE Towers as to who can conjure up the most absurd 'dilemma'?

Conversely how are your costs accounted for in the travel to work? transport? wear and tear on shoes if you walk? new tyre if on bicycle? Do you take a packed lunch to work or do you ever buy lunch out? Assuming the WFH partner makes lunch at home at assumed less costs than purchased lunch.

@CSI_Yorkshire 100%... when it gets to cold season they could start counting tissues

elsien

turnitround said:

I swear some people have no idea of the meaning of the word partner.  How does a relationship in which you were secure enough to bring children into the world turn into a business transaction. Mutual support is everything in a relationship and quibbling about should my partner pay more is not conducive to a happy relationship. 
Perhaps look at it another way. He is lucky to be able to work from home as it cuts down on travel costs and wear and tear on a vehicle.
This sounds like 2 children arguing about who has the most chips on thier plate.

This. With knobs on. 

dunstonh

He contributes more towards bills than I do, as I reduced my hours, and therefore pay, to care for our child, but I think he should contribute even more, as he uses much more energy, water and so on than I do.

See how you manage if you drive him away.   This is a relationship on borrowed time.

bryanb

Don’t get too serious, This is a hypothetical thread

GingerTim

I suspect MSE might regret posting this in the plain speakin' energy forum!

Brie

GingerTim said:

I suspect MSE might regret posting this in the plain speakin' energy forum!

well spotted!!!

And just to stir things a bit.....I'm well aware that some couples, completely emotionally devoted to each other, keep their finances completely separate.  I don't know how they do it as it seems like a lot of work at times.  But if one must then I would do it strictly down the lines of how much one makes not by how much one uses.  Going down the "uses" route means the child should be contributing as well!

QrizB

Brie said:

GingerTim said:

I suspect MSE might regret posting this in the plain speakin' energy forum!

well spotted!!!

And just to stir things a bit.....I'm well aware that some couples, completely emotionally devoted to each other, keep their finances completely separate.

OTOH the QrizB household runs on strictly Marxist principles:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/From_each_according_to_his_ability,_to_each_according_to_his_needs

We have a joint account that receives our salaries, from which household bills are paid and from which we each draw an allowance for personal spending.

Alnat1

QrizB said:

We have a joint account that receives our salaries, from which household bills are paid and from which we each draw an allowance for personal spending.

Sounds perfect. Pretty much what happens in our house too.