Progress not Perfection

foxgloves

Oh dear, additional beer isn't at all helpful when taking balance & digestive problems into account. I think there's likely to be some truth in what you often say, @Sun_Addict, that Mr SA gets bored being at home all day & goes around looking for things to do. I expect they provide an additional little kick if they are things he knows you would perceive as 'naughty'. I wouldn't like having my access to things curtailed as an adult either, but where alcohol, stairs, falls, etc, are concerned, it is you who would have to deal with the consequences, both dealing with paramedic call-outs plus any possible cleaning up. It isn't fair. I don't think what has happened to Mr SA's physical & mental capabilities is fair either, but there does need to be some acknowledgement (& gratitude) that you have a very big workload with working full time, being his carer & looking after the home. I think you are also of slight build, so you are in no way able to lift or move a big bloke on your own, especially from a prone position to standing. I don't know what the answer is, as I suspect that with him still getting out & about on his scooter & being able (?) to do the tasks that often seem to be tested (making a hot drink, sandwich, getting to the loo, getting dressed, showering, etc), & with adult social care stretched to breaking point, that Mr SA may still be beneath the threshold for meaningful intervention. I may be wrong though as my experience of this is limited. It's such a difficult situation for you & I can feel your frustration levels rising. Did the brain injury affect impulse control? If so, that could explain the sneaky extra beer drinking, idk. Glad you have now hidden it away, but what a nuisance that you need to do so.

liselle

And yes, I suspect the Ambulance Crew wouldn’t have spoken to a male carer like that, if the roles were reversed.Disgraceful behaviour and they should know better.

enthusiasticsaver

Hiding the beer and the money may be the way to go SA but you should not have to do that.  I do think there is some truth in the fact he is obviously bored during the day and gets a kick from doing something he knows will annoy you.  Incredibly unfair.  Is he in a position to buy this beer himself? My feeling would be to stop buying it altogether or rationing given he probably should not be drinking beer as that will aggravate IBS. If he would then troop out to buy himself on his scooter that would make it worse.  So whereas I get that buying in bulk is probably cheaper my inclination would be to ration him by maybe just buying a four pack on a Friday to last over the weekend and then no more until the following Friday.  You may get grief but in the long run it might be better. 

The ambulance crew were out of order suggesting you move to a bungalow to make their lives easier. 

frisby40

Your diary is inspiring, I’m now following ❤️