December 2022: The Turtles do the Cha Cha Cha

ldee2111

Belated happy birthday thrifty! 

Hugs abundant. I think that robin was there for some company x

x

BadBookkeeper

Hello turtles.

We’re back from a very expensive Center Parcs!  Had a budget and have money left over.  NSD 5/15.  It’s snowing a little bit here.  Due to see Santa this afternoon and although already paid for, I’m sure we’ll stay for a hot chocolate. I also need to buy something for my parents and for girls in work from Center Parcs but not paying their prices so will get boxes of biscuits.

Delivery driver left very expensive gift for ds on the doorstep for an hour this morning, not happy with that but glad I have it.

Enjoying the football, yesterdays matches were fab!

I received a lovely bar of chocolate via C@Dbury secret Santa promotion from my best friend and she’s also bought me a Christmas tv mag.  Very thoughtful.  I’m so grateful for her friendship.

Well I’ve got loads to do today and I’m still in pjs!  Will have a brew and catch up on here first then I must crack on!  Have a lovely day. 

grandmanerd

Hugs abundant. You can live with it - just be sure not to let it dominate your life. Use those building blocks to keep yourself on an even keel - exercise, eating properly, practising gratitude, journalling (or use this thread to pour out all your thoughts !!!!!! I frequently do), meditation, keeping alcohol and caffeine consumption down and avoiding overspending on 'treating yourself' (we all know how much that helps).

When I was broke, overweight and depressed (it seemed to be semi-permanent for many years) I found that my mood went in cycles and if I recognised when this was happening or likely to happen I would take a small amount of cash from the machine (£5 or £10) and go out to spend it on things that helped - W00lworths sold a cinnamon or ginger votive for less than a £ and burning that was very uplifting, I'd pick a book from the cs, buy bath soak or a fancy soap (cs often sell posh soaps - the ones with bits in - for 50p and a small decorative item that made me smile every time I saw it - it could be something I'd seen in a cs that wasn't an essential (maybe a jigsaw or a candlestick) or a postcard. All inexpensive but they all helped.

Include as many of the things that make you happy in your life as you can. Monitor your mood and have some extra options to help when you start sliding into that downward spiral. Music - research shows that sad music can improve your mood so happy songs, dance music to make you move until you fall down or wallow with those musicians who know exactly what it feels like. Cuddling a puppy, playing with a baby (not for everyone and please ask the 'guardian's' permission or depression will  be the least of your problems) or having something to cuddle - if you feel 'daft' holding onto a cuddly toy (goth bunny says everyone needs someone or something to hug) buy yourself a character hot water bottle (I bought my aunt a large bugs bunny one in the last year of her life). I worry every time apple mentions throwing the bear into the microwave but then I used to apologise to the soft toys when I was pegging them by their ears on the washing line.

If it's any consolation people with depression (it's only part of you, not your whole identity) have higher than average intelligence and are more realistic - we can read situations, analyse what's happening  and extrapolate so we know what will happen next. This means that to protect ourselves we need to limit our exposure to 'news' and public life - try to react with anger and action but don't watch each bulletin obsessively until you are too despairing to  do anything.

Try to limit your exposure to negative people and situations. DS3 was being bullied once and a staff member in W00lworths stepped in, took him to the staff room and called the police (and offered to be a witness at the subsequent court case). Victim Support sent him a wonderful counsellor, a kind and gentle man. he dealt with all the child abuse victims but had the ability to leave his work behind him at the end of the day which allowed him to continue doing his work (I'd have been wide awake in the middle of the night and no use to anyone thereafter).

Having a sense of humour (however black) helps enormously. I've been through some tough times but later on I've been able to turn some of those incidents into funny stories - the sting's often still there but laughing at it puts me in control. I dismantled what's left of this year's diary. The first 3 months in particular track me dealing with various aspects of mum's estate (I think they were originally in whatever notebook or scrap paper was to hand whilst making phone calls etc but I transferred as much as possible to the diary when I was preparing to come back here (had the phone and internet at mum's turned off on the 10th March).

A couple of days after mum's funeral there's an entry that says 'laughing at the absurdity'. It took a moment but then I remembered that I'd spilt something on the bed (a yoghurt or something even more gloopy and sticky). It had fallen in the worst possible place - on a tangle of cables including the laptop charger and I was sitting perched on the edge of the bed half dressed trying to untangle and extricate cables and scraps of paper with important reminders from this puddle of yoghurt without spreading the mess. Suddenly I started laughing because I had all this important and serious stuff to deal with and my top priority was picking cables up and wiping yoghurt off them.

thriftylass

Not an NSD today either. Dropped DS off at a party at the other end of town and popped into D0bbies next to it for a coffee and to write Xmas cards I brought with me. Just as well as they were so glittery and the stuff went everywhere. Bought them online and hadn't realised. The recipients will not thank me 🤣. At least it's not in my house 😜. Also bought some seeds for next year.

lcc86

@abundant1972 I would be wary of completely accepting a diagnosis from someone who's never spoken to you, might be worth pushing for further assessment directly with the psychiatrist to make sure it's accurate. 

Walked my friend's dog this morning, beautiful crispy grass and fresh cold air, was lovely! Then my sister came round for a couple of hours with my nieces and we exchanged presents. 

Also went for a haircut and popped to the shop, only intended to get eggs but managed to spend £25 in the farm shop! Oops.

apple_muncher

Today I am grateful for a successful shopping trip with dc where they found several presents for people, for a lie in, for the beautiful frost, for a warm house, for the washing machine.

DawnW

Still on NSD 5 as I remembered that the car breakdown insurance needed to be renewed   Just as well I sorted and tidied up the pile of paperwork that had accumulated underneath my diary. Got 2 long term residents out of the freezer this morning - a haggis and some scallops. Cooked the scallops for dinner, with some chorizo and served with new potatoes, salad and the cooking juices with a squirt of lemon juice added. We will have the haggis tomorrow. Also removed 5 large trays of stewed apple and quince from the freezer, and composted it. It just wasn't nice, and although I abhor food waste, there is no point in paying to keep things we don't like frozen. At least this way it will eventually feed the garden! I washed, dried and put away the foil trays so that they can be used again.

Very frosty here, and apart from trips to the compost heap and a quick dog walk, I haven't been out. Spent the morning sorting out some items to take to my sales unit on Monday, and the afternoon baking. I made bread in the BM, and some chocolate buns and flapjacks for treats for the week.

Tomorrow I intend to sort out the freezers, with a view to getting everything into the large one, and turning off the smaller one, in an effort to conserve electricity.

grandmanerd

Mostly sorting out in my room today - had a shower, decided it was too cold to get dressed anywhere other the bedclothes. Put on many layers but had food and enough things to do that I never bothered finding bottoms, just kept the cover pulled up over me. Filled a bin bag and finished off one I'd taken downstairs. I have written most of my Christmas cards and several long notes / short letters. Picked 5 to use the stamps I had. have 2 more that need letters (added different bits where people will be seeing each other eg my uncle and his son - they can tell each other the other bits). 

Was bothered about a phone call from my brother last night. he seems to go into free fall anxiety and jumps about from one 'problem' to another. Have been messaging my niece for the past couple of days and just had a long phone call with her and apparently he does this with her - I'd asked if she'd done a budget with him (he will lose means tested benefits when the bungalow money comes through but will keep his PIP (think he gets a higher amount than me because he can't cope with bills, officialdom etc - she does all that for him). I'm sticking with sharing the income money for the bungalow (the solicitor has asked him to take his bank details in so I and my niece are hoping this means she will split the money and put half into each of our bank accounts.

I'll be seeing him on Monday (solicitors, collect the stuff I can't carry back from mum's and hopefully go in the library and sort mum's Council Tax rebate/ anything owing). Niece will be seeing him on Monday because he doesn't know how to put the car's back seats flat but she has an appointment later. She's also trawling round various appointments with him on Wednesday so suggested we might meet up after that (probably in the library as there aren't usually many people in and if either of us needs the toilet we can go up in the lift). 

Grateful for a sensible niece, lovely picture of the grandpuppy with their Christmas tree, easy to grab and eat food, making progress.

beanielou

I have had a very lovely day of doing not very much & reading & pottering.

thriftylass

@DawnW We love haggis, but for some reason only have it once a year on Burns night as a main. Occasionally we have a slice with a cooked breakfast or as Balmoral chicken.