Moving on with things

daisy_1571

Good girl!  Ive got a speedmaster, hope she continues to love hers as much as I love mine.

Your diary is just so positive,  I really hope you are enjoying getting more out of life now

Daisy xx

strawb_shortcake

Alt, it's great to see your diary much more positive these days. 

My OH is really into his bikes, he's a massive fan of itchy boots, a solo female that's ridden across India, Africa and the Americas. You can watch episodes on You tube.
My OH has just bought a "new" but really old BSA to restore. Think it's probably going to take 2 years to complete but a nice project for him. 

Your wife could also do Santa's on bikes, I'm sure there's a Midlands one 

RelievedSheff

Glad to hear you sounding better Alt.

Sounds like two good purchases there that will give you some fantastic family memories. 

alt80

Decided on a few personal goals for February, some related to low spending. I goal set for my business on a 5 yearly, yearly, bi-annually, quarterly, monthly, weekly and daily basis so I’m used to doing it but neglect my personal life. So whilst I haven’t fully set it up, I am setting up the daily, weekly and monthly goals. Hoping to make this last for 2025 but we’ll see.
January was scant on goals I set personally, it was basically just to engage with the pros and to finish work at lunch on Fridays. 

February’s so far are the same as January’s plus action for happiness diary, cook once or twice a week and journaling which, for me, is a mix of a diary, photographs and my wife is showing me how to use adobe fresco on the iPad so perhaps a drawing or two. I really enjoyed painting when I was in the rehab but find it’s too messy / time consuming so if I can get my head around the iPad ‘painting’ that’d be nice. 

Finances wise, I don’t really have too many goals apart from to put aside £575 as the ‘repayment’ part of the i/o mortgage. Do we call that the start of me actually working towards mortgage free ha. Actually get some money into the SSAS this month (that’s on the business side really but obviously impacts our future personally). And, a bit less eating out, few more no spend days - is keep plodding a goal lol? 

@daisy_1571 Really nice choice there, the Speedmaster in black and white is sublime. There was one at the dealership my wife bought hers from. Her’s is a Speed Twin, not going to lie I’m a bit jealous now it’s here, haha it’s a lovely looking and sounding machine.

I’m trying to just take one day at a time rn.

@strawb_shortcake thank you. I don’t quit easily, ha and haven’t come this far for nothing. I’ve seriously struggled on the recovery journey, I hadn’t really realised just how hard it would be and that I would struggle so much with my mental health coming to terms with things. 

I’ll have to show her the YouTube channel, she loves usernamekate and her Lancashire (I think) accent haha. Tbf I don’t want her getting ideas about !!!!!! off to Africa on a bike. She’d probably be well up for the Santa on bikes haha.

Our friends with the classic cars have older bikes too, they seem like little other than trouble, never seem to work, worse than the cars so good luck with it.

@RelievedSheff My wife is determined we’ll make some memories. She has been trying to persuade me over this weekend to come on this Wales trip in the Mk2 as some sort of !!!!!! weird little pace car to make me drive further than I have in years with no option to opt out. She says she wants me well enough to do the NC500 next year despite me saying it’s not really on my radar anymore idk.

warby68

Your wife is blossoming - maybe a late bloomer, but definitely finding her adult feet and also herself, as someone other than Alt Jr's mum/friend. Let her take you along for the ride (literally). You must be so proud of her. 

You're not on the breadline but If some more financial goals help you, set them, if they don't ,don't. I like the way you're building your goals up and not swapping out what are obviously good ones. 

I'd make the extra mortgage part of the bills ie take it out at the beginning of the month and not by seeing how much you have left at the end. I think the latter has more potential for arguments and slippage. At some point you'll feel satisfied that all of the mortgage is on track for repayment and maybe even relax a little (yeah, I know but I can hope for you)

If I'm right, since you were at almost total melt down before Christmas you have been to Lapland and loved it, seen your wife through her tests, buying a bike and taking some finance on, both of you have compromised on the spending of the new surplus,  you have started to repay the IO element of your mortgage, you are going out on some social events, got over a daft bit of jealousy, your wife is sort of working with the nails and trying to act on customer comes first, with success, made 2025 holiday plans, and of course , you have not fallen off the path. I've probably missed some but that is a heck of a lot of achievement for one month, even if it was never ending January

Just look back at what you have done a little bit, not what you haven't.

daisy_1571

Great progress alt, plodding on is definitely a great goal, most people don't get rich quick but lots certainly get richer slowly so keep on doing good decisions. 

The speed twin is a nice bike, (reminds me of the old 400/4s which is more my era of style, I like a bike to look like a bike rather than a slab of plastic) reallyglad you are both pleased with it. 

Dxx

RelievedSheff

Do the NC500 next year. You will love it.

alt80

So much for a quiet few days this week, I spoke far too !!!!!! soon ha. Work has been crazy. I’ve managed to get an injury at the gym, can hardly !!!!!! move my arm. Blaming the wife for pushing me too hard ha. 

@warby68 she had a bit of a bump in the road when she got back into social media but getting her bike licence has been brilliant for her. I am proud of her, have been for a long time now. I think she realised that she needs to step back a little when our son relegated her from football, they’ll only let her in goal when needed now. She has a stupid amount of energy and Ioves playing with them but they’re pushing back a little bit. It’s !!!!!! hilarious tbf but !!!!!! devastating to her lol.

A lot of the work I’ve been doing with the pros involves facing the ‘what if’ situations and addressing how much I was worrying about the future tbf it was wrecking my relationships. Unfortunately when I try to put 100% of my efforts into work I go downhill rapidly, the pros made me face the patterns and what we all think it would eventually lead to. I need to just forget getting to the next level and stay in this lane, it’s better for me and my relationships too. 

Yeah as you have gathered I can forget the surplus staying safe but already made that provision for the additional mortgage amount - treating it as a bill. It’s just how my finances work, I deal with it once a month and be done with it. Our expenses are still all put on a credit card and paid (in full these days ha) a month in arrears, always done it that way and it’s not broke so why fix it? 

We’ve had a good month and when you put it like that it seems like a really good one! 

@daisy_1571 I’m trying not to wind myself up too much about the money / what ifs etc. All being well things will go in the direction of progress but I need to keep reminding myself also that my family are in a fortunate position, we’re lucky. There are so many people with so much less than we have, not necessarily through a fault of their own or a lack of work ethic. 

It’s a lovely thing to look at. The 400/4s of yesteryear are a thing of beauty, they don’t make engines like that anymore. 

@RelievedSheff That’s two of you on my case fml haha.

daisy_1571

Just a quick thought,  you used to worry about your lad growing up, not sure if thats such a worry now but a few years ago my brother in his late 50s hired a camper and him and his 2 laddies went round the nc500.  They were late 20s and early 30s so, if you have the relationship (which you guys seem to have), things can still be close but also even better as youll have an adult friend in your son

Dxx

alt80

Been off here for a bit. Work has been unexpectedly busy due to staff absences, although I have stuck with the plan and balance it’s meant me switching off all my electronic devices once home to stop checking emails in an obsessive way. Really trying to stick with the pros advice and move forward. After some pretty severe struggles with my mental health I have accepted I need to work on accepting myself and building a semblance of self worth. Sleep has been difficult the past few days and I have had to stop reading about the Ukraine situation, idk when the sleep gets really evasive I know it affects my mental health and I need to protect that before keeping up to date.

Financially things are going ok, for whatever reason my wife wants to spend time with me so I have had to adjust my expectations about our spending. She is paying for her bike so far and managed to make a bit of extra money from one of her nail friends wanting some branding design, I couldn’t believe it when she told me that she charged her for it. 

@daisy_1571 I worry about his future all the time. Thank you for a bit of hope - it would be nice to think things could be like that.