Help, what to do? Son's teacher just told him Santa's Not Real

FluffyFiFi

Emms wrote: »

Ok so not a high school thing, my mistake using the word teens.

Emma

No, it's me, sorry for being prickly. I probably am upset that the "lie" is ruined and my pleasure in seeing the children so happy is spoilt.

southernscouser

FluffyFiFi wrote: »

and it is up to us to tell him any different.

I disagree with this! I don't have kids so no doubt I won't understand, but the school is there to educate kids. Not fill their heads with fantasys (as nice and as magical as they are).

Do you also feel it is up to to decide on what he learns and when?

By the time kids go to secondary I personally would expect all of them to know Santa ain't real. You can't hold a school or teacher accountable for not having done their homework (pun intended) on which children have been told what!

I hope that doesn't come across as @rsey. It's not meant to be.

Is your son upset because the magic has gone, or that he is gutted because he thinks he won't get any presents? :rolleyes:

jackieb

I don't see the need for the teacher to mention santa at all. Not every 11yo is wordly wise and acts like a teenager. My 11yo just told me this year that she knows santa's not real. I think she's known for years. I've never actually sat any of my 4 down to tell them santa's not real. They can figure that out in their own time.

FluffyFiFi

Alan_T wrote: »

I'm sorry but I can't sympathise with this.

You want to blame your child's teacher for correcting lies you have been telling your child? I believe you need to take a serious look at yourself on this one... Christmas is a religious festival, not an excuse to buy gifts for children, nor feed them lies about the meaning of the day. I'm not religious in the slightest, but totally detest what people have turned this day into.

I think the only real reason that you are annoyed on this is that your child will quite rightly start doubting what you say. This sounds like you kept this whole charade going for your own benefit rather than the welfare of your child.

Sorry but this is not true. I remember how wonderful it was waking up on Christmas morning and feeling the presents at the end of my bed. I didn't question where they came from, probably didn't care as I was just a child. This is a feeling that I want to re-create for my children and I don't think it is anyone's right to tell them any different. I am not arguing the rights or wrongs of Father Christmas, just the right or wrong of a teacher dispelling the belief.

Resident_Evil

jackieb wrote: »

I don't see the need for the teacher to mention santa at all. Not every 11yo is wordly wise and acts like a teenager. My 11yo just told me this year that she knows santa's not real. I think she's known for years. I've never actually sat any of my 4 down to tell them santa's not real. They can figure that out in their own time.

I was talking to my 13 year old about this only the other day. She was brought up to believe in Santa, we used to sprinkle flour on the floor and everything. I asked her how she felt when she realised he wasn't real. She said she couldn't remember and I think this is the best way. It wasn't a real shock, she didn't feel she had been deceived and she didn't look stupid in front of her friends. Let your children grow up in their own time not when you think they should.;)

kiera123_2

It certainly wouldn't have been the nicest way to find out, but I imagine teachers assume by secondary school children would have figured it out. They really should have at this point. Logical thinking and all that.

I'd sit your son down and explain that he isn't real and that he'll still get his presents. To be honest, I do think it's totally inappropriate that you wish to continue with perpetuating this myth at this point. What would have happened had the children in his class realised he still believed? I know one poor child had the mickey taken out of him for a very long time. It's really not fair that the child was put in that position.

Sometimes, you need to be cruel to be kind and it's better coming from you than the kids in his class.

MrsTinks

WHOA!!! This is the special celebrations board - not the "how to bring your children up or what they should believe in" board
I don't think it's a teachers place to tell a child santa isn't real then again I think at 11 I'd have thought he'd be aware of that himself anyway... My brother sussed it at 8... With no aid from me I hasten to add!
However - Please be nice to all money savers.




On an extreemly personal note... if I was to be totaly honest then I'd probably not teach them about baby jesus either as Iam pagan so technically the term Christmas is incorrect - but I love the idea of Santa, even if he's now a twisted version of a saint,stained with commercesialism instead of politics and religion... So in the spirit of christmas - how about some constructive comments?

FluffyFiFi

southernscouser wrote: »

I disagree with this! I don't have kids so no doubt I won't understand, but the school is there to educate kids. Not fill their heads with fantasys (as nice and as magical as they are).

Do you also feel it is up to to decide on what he learns and when?

By the time kids go to secondary I personally would expect all of them to know Santa ain't real. You can't hold a school or teacher accountable for not having done their homework (pun intended) on which children have been told what!

I hope that doesn't come across as @rsey. It's not meant to be.

Is your son upset because the magic has gone, or that he is gutted because he thinks he won't get any presents? :rolleyes:

I know what you are saying and the majority of children would be okay, but yes, I do expect to have a say in what is taught to my child. For example, the lessons on sex education are run past the parents first so we know what is to be taught and what questions are to be asked. People's beliefs are theirs and no-one has any right to dismiss them, regardless of what they are. So we all know that this is not real, but so what. Let them have the belief. There were a few children in the class who believed, or wanted to believe and now they don't and are sad.

rosekitten

some like the magic of christmas more than others
and prefer to be in blissful ingnorance theres nothing
wrong with that.My dopy brother told his 5 year old
there was no santa,disgraceful

Resident_Evil

On the whole it sounds like the teachers are quite considerate at your son's school. We get told nothing about the sex education they receive not even any notice of when it will be taking place. I have to rely on my daughter to keep my informed:mad: