Mrs S…the next chapter (separation and all that comes with it)

MrsSave

That’s the valuations done. I was so worried about them. As well as the 2 today, the bank have done one for the remortgage so we have 3 to work from. Two were quite similar, and the third was ridiculously high (so much so my husband said that we ignore it and work off the other 2. It was nowhere near the price any of the houses around us have sold for in the past year). We have come up with a figure and have worked out the amount for me to buy my husband out. I have also posted a load of form for the transfer of equity and remortgage today do things are moving in the right direction. I know this won’t be a quick process and I’m sure there will be bumps in the road but we’re taking steps!

Hopefully I’ll sleep better tonight now that has been done! I’ve got quite a heavy week in work this week, but have to pop to the bank to pay a work cheque in tomorrow morning so will take an extra hour off for a walk to Boots to try on some foundation. I have had the same foundation for a ridiculous number of years and there is almost nothing left so think it’s time for a new one. I only wear makeup around once a fortnight-ish so it lasts ages. My skin has changed a lot since the last time I bought some (matured we’ll say!!) so will have a hunt for something that suits me and hopefully they still colour match in store. I still have money leftover from my birthday so will use this.

Honeysucklelou2

As I understand it - and I’m not a legal person - a judicial separation allows a couple to legally separate, have a financial order but are not free to remarry as those who are divorced are able to. The consent order for a judicial separation can’t be a completely  clean break as divorced couples can be but can be worded so as to prevent one party being able to go back on an agreement.  

MrsSave

Thank you @Honeysucklelou2. That does make sense. I’ll hopefully have the solicitor phoning over the next day or 2 to make an appointment so can talk it through with them.
 

One of the estate agents (an online only one) who did a valuation (the ridiculously high one) has since emailed me and then phoned me. I was quite honest about the reason for the valuation but can confirm that if I was looking to sell I would not be going with them. They are too pushy (and the person who came out was a complete salesman…..totally different to the local estate agent). 

I picked up the new foundation I was after (spent ages researching different ones of the weekend and this had amazing reviews) and they did colour match for me. Had a few freebies with it which is a bonus because they’re quite nice ones! I also popped into M&S for a couple of freebies from the Sparks card and managed to come back home without stopping in Wilko where I usually pick up some pretty stationery that I don’t need. I call that a win! I did need to put petrol in the car though, so couldn’t afford the stationery anyway 

I’m getting pretty good at having leftovers for lunch. I am writing on a whiteboard on the fridge what needs eating quickly and putting dates on it. I’m hoping it means less waste and unforgotten foods!!

Chrystal

MrsSave said:

I’m getting pretty good at having leftovers for lunch. I am writing on a whiteboard on the fridge what needs eating quickly and putting dates on it. I’m hoping it means less waste and unforgotten foods!!

Such a brilliant idea!  So much gets wasted here and after reading this I've been on the big river site and ordered 2, one each for fridge and freezer. Thank you!

savingholmes

Are you waiting to do a no fault divorce? I think that comes in from April. I think even then though there is a mandatory waiting period built in - and ironically it can take you longer to do than it did before.

You have to have decree nisi in place before you can submit your financial consent order. I was told it can take as long or longer to get a separation order done as to divorce so I didn't bother with that. It would have all been extra cost anyway. 

MrsSave

Myself and my husband had a good chat over the weekend and decided our priority at the moment was the house, and that the divorce can wait a little longer. There are probably quite a few people waiting for the no fault divorce which could slow down the process even more than it is currently. Divorce will eventually happen, but neither of us are in a big rush to get it sorted immediately.

I then had my appointment with the solicitor at the start of the week, and she agreed with that way of thinking and that the house was the priority as I already have a mortgage offer. My mortgage offer is in place for 6 months and she said that is more than enough time and the separation order should be drawn up within a couple of weeks and then just needs my husband to take it to his solicitor to agree to it.

She did try to persuade me to ask for a different percentage of the equity, and then to take a small percentage off my husband’s amount as the only way I’d get my hands on an equal amount would be to sell and then I’d be paying fees. I’ve decided against both of those for various reasons, which she understood. We’re splitting the equity 50:50. 

I’ve found that I’ve spent more during March than the past couple of months so I’m going to spend a bit of time at some point this week looking at where/why and then hopefully pull it back a bit during April (though the Easter Holidays won’t help with that!).

peb

Just make sure you check out the sdlt situation, I'm possibly out of date on this but it was always the case that to ensure no liability you cited the financial order as consideration.  I'd be wary of taking advice from a family lawyer on a tax implication.

MrsSave

peb said:

Just make sure you check out the sdlt situation, I'm possibly out of date on this but it was always the case that to ensure no liability you cited the financial order as consideration.  I'd be wary of taking advice from a family lawyer on a tax implication.

Thank you. I will look into it.

Hazelnutty

Just wanted to say hi! I've read your diary cover to cover and have subscribed I was in a similar position myself and separated and divorced amicably from my XH. Wishing you the very best for the next stage in your life.

savingholmes

Good luck with it all.