NST April 2021: Diamonds and Daisies

mothernerd

I think today has been successful but very spendy, slightly indulgent and I've made one very stupid, costly mistake. Mum asked if she should phone the doctor's as it was 5 to nine. I said 'go ahead' as I was still trying to take my morning pills and as anyone who has ever phoned the doctor's knows, 5 to 9 is one of the worst times to do so. She got straight through (beginner's luck) and next time I went through the front room, she announced that they could be picked up after 4 pm - she thought she would phone one of the grand-daughters.

Then she asked could I find the phone number for her travel vouchers. I did look this up earlier in the week, they are taking orders for them. Usually they send out a letter but I explained that people are working from home and that they might not have wanted to send letters as most of the voucher people are vulnerable and therefore quite a few of them will have died and they thought letters might upset grieving relatives. Then spent half an hour asking her if she wanted her full complement of vouchers (most of last year's were not used and we won't be doing much for a while yet). I phoned. Just as well as I ended up entering card details on the phone keypad - mum has trouble moving one arrow space on the tv remote. Ordered the full batch (mum pays £30 but gets £120 worth of vouchers) but told her I don't want any complaints if we end up not using them all.

Made bacon soup from kitchen scraps, bagged up and froze two dinners worth of sliced lamb and have enough chunks and bits for a lamb curry and possibly hot pot (although mum will assume I meant to make potato hash and explain how I've got it wrong - she nearly had a melt down a fortnight ago because I suggested using a vegetable other than carrots in pea soup).

Went outside after lunch, did a lot more than I originally intended. Lots of stones moved/ moving including the chimney shaped compost bin full. More digging, dug enough tree roots out to make a small tree and tried to do some 'easy' jobs in between - stapling lengths of plastic netting onto the fence panels. Found mum my claw hammer and pliers to remove two nails from a fence panel. Emphasised that they are my tools, as was the trowel I lent her (3 trowels came out of my garden bag and 3 trowels will be going back in - mum tends to adopt anything that is around for too long 'Oh I've had that for ages'.

Came in for the second time at 3 pm (cold and worn out) and then mum asked if I was going for the pills or was she (I thought she was phoning one of the gds). Scrubbed, scraped and scrubbed my nails again (still not perfect) and gathered various bits I needed for going out. Tried to phone the doctor's to check where the prescription would be sent - mum 'assumed' it was going to the pharmacy downstairs from the doctor's. Doctor's was busy, so I ended up getting a taxi to the infirmary, queued in a socially distanced manner (then 2 people dropped out of the 'queue' - dotted about a square entryway) only to be told that it had been sent (as I expected) to the branch in the town centre. Went to check times for the little bus. Service has dropped to hourly - it's running almost empty for most of the time because lots of regular appointments aren't happening. Nearly half an hour to wait so phoned for another taxi and was dropped off near the market (driver was alarmed that it was closed but I explained it was convenient for the places I needed to go). 

Another wait for mum's pills - don't know what their system is but they always seem to hunt in various cupboards and shelves before finding your prescription (sometimes they have to go upstairs or phone up and the lady from upstairs comes down). Decided that if I hurried (hobbled as fast as I could), I might get to the front of the bus station in time to catch the bus I wouldn't wait for earlier.

My original plan for the week was to try to get to day 10 before spending and then to do the SM order and do a quick trip to town and shop at Will Co (will need a spirit level to fine tune the raised beds and need various other bits). Milk is delivered and mum isn't eating bread so by drinking only filtered tap water and cutting out little luxuries, I've managed to keep on track. I could just have got cash from the build soc and gone across to W's to buy the things I've been working round. However mum has been meithering about flowers. The lady who sold her the raffle tickets and then brought her the chocolate egg hamper has updated her on the state of health of several members of the congregation and two people she was going to send flowers to have now become asap. I tried ordering online on Monday but the florist isn't open until the 12th.

So before I left the house mum had suggested that I could pick up the pills and then get a taxi to Morries, get her cash and then buy the flowers (Morries is the nearest SM to the bungalow but cars aren't allowed to cut through the estate and have to go up or down the bypass to the nearest junction. She then suggested going to Sainsbugs (get cash, buy flowers). She even did a little fantasy where I got the taxi driver to drive round whilst I delivered the flowers to the 2 recipients (whereas if she had phoned gd who has a car, she could have bought the flowers and lives in the same street as one of the recipients and the other one is just around the corner from there).

So caught the little bus (only me and one other lady who was waiting at the bus station with me - very chatty but I was only getting one word in three so I settled for smiling and nodding along) to Morries. As I stepped off the bus my foot 'went'.  Felt just like spraining an ankle but the injury is definitely to the sole of my heel. The crossing point is right by where you get off the bus and there are benches on the other side but no. I hobbled to a waste bin and then to the benches on this side of the road. After resting I hobbled back to the crossing, must have looked done in because two cars stopped for me even though both the lights and zebra markings have been withdrawn. I sat on the benches on the far side of the road, then again on the bench by Morries entrance. A man was using the cash machine. when he finished I went to the machines, used the alternate one, keyed in the pin, remembered that machine has a lower limit than mum's, requested that amount, said yes to a receipt, took the card back and then turned and walked away without the receipt or the money although didn't realise that until later. 

Did the hand and trolley sanitising. Picked flowers (2 for £5 bunches of roses, 2 for £5 spray carnations), bought two meal deals (£2.50 for a sandwich, £3 for a sandwich, snack and drink). Mum had decided on her tea before I left then asked what I was having. Considering the scenarios she was laying out for me, I said I would decide when I got back, at midnight. Bought bread buns (mum fancied tuna and asked if I had any barm cakes left). Bought chocolate, caffeine free diet coke (I'm all watered out, had a slug of orange juice this morning), cake - will have to limit these as having done a week or more of 'cold turkey' the additives will flatten me. Bought 3 packs of bbq skewers (this is to hold the old raised bed panels together, original 'dowels' are all cut to 6" / 15cm and I want them in a new higher formation - one of the things I wanted from W's).

Bought myself 2 cut price novels from 2 of my favourite authors and a puzzle mag which may be the one I completed and threw away earlier in the week (new one due next week). Bought 5 books from the charity shelf (suggested donation 50 p per book). No biscuits, no yoghurts, resisted fruit pies and other temptations - SM has moved things round and as the trolley was the only thing keeping me upright, I wasn't prepared to trundle down numerous aisles trying to find them. I have a few indulgences, will ration them and then go back to doing without. This is going to be the 'big shop' planned for day 10 and will now try to get through to day 20, keep using up the odd bits left in the corners of the freezer.

Taxi back to the bungalow, picked the scenic route - through the leafy, posh part of town rather than the shorter but busier route. Driver brought all the bags to the door. Reimbursed mum for the lost cash (luckily had more than enough in my savings tin to cover it, but will need to do a recount and see how much I need to top up my penny challenge). Now back on the bed, surrounded by goodies (third book I had on order was in the post box), going back into hibernation and do not want to go shopping ever again.

Grateful for getting a lot done (may need a couple of days rest now), solving mum's pill crisis, finding the bbq skewers and them being almost exactly how I imagined them (have worked through various options for how to make it work). Tired but happy, not in any pain but haven't attempted to move recently. Also found a hedgehog for mum's friend's b'day present and an owl which mum has designs on but owls are mine.

facethemusic

mothernerd- that sounds like a ridiculously stressful day, hopefully the sum of money lost wasn't huge. I really hope you can spend tomorrow doing something relaxing that you enjoy. 

Thursday- NSD 5/16. I feel like I may be "cheating" slightly- I know I need to buy something online, but I'm waiting until tomorrow to buy it so that I didn't "lose" today and tomorrow will be a spending day anyway 🤣. 
Grateful today that the weather is (slightly) better, pony fun, DD spending some time playing outside with a friend while his mum and I tried to hide from the wind. 

Buffythedebtslayer

mothernerd said:

Was feeling great until mum announced that she thought that they had not sent any steroids in her last pill package (only the ones that mean she can swallow, eat food). She has 2 mg for tomorrow, she needs 5 mg (but what can you do at 5 pm on a Wednesday - half day closing at our surgery). Her obsession with 'tidiness' meant she put the bag of pills away in a cupboard before I could check them and of course she didn't check them. So fun times tomorrow.

Hello Mothernerd XX 

Just wanted to say, I asked Mum to order her meds last weekend, no joy, so she ordered them Tuesday.... I went yesterday - twice cos who doesn't love a visit to the chemist. They weren't all there, not her fault, but her pain relief was missing........so this morning I rung thel lovely chemist to ask about the missing pills and the pain killers........he sorted it all cos he is great and I went back again this evening to collect........Mum is oblivious to most of this. I hope your fun times aren't too complicated. XXX  

mothernerd

facethemusic said:

mothernerd- that sounds like a ridiculously stressful day, hopefully the sum of money lost wasn't huge. I really hope you can spend tomorrow doing something relaxing that you enjoy. 

Thursday- NSD 5/16. I feel like I may be "cheating" slightly- I know I need to buy something online, but I'm waiting until tomorrow to buy it so that I didn't "lose" today and tomorrow will be a spending day anyway 🤣. 
Grateful today that the weather is (slightly) better, pony fun, DD spending some time playing outside with a friend while his mum and I tried to hide from the wind. 

Not cheating at all, most of us do it. You are thinking ahead, bunching all your purchases together.

Buffythedebtslayer

Wow Mothernerd. 
Just WOW. That is a total palaver. I really hope your foot is ok. Why on Earth didn't your mum ring the Grand daughter. 
It is all a bit bananas  as in the lengths we go to get the pills! X  

DrCarrie

Morning Turtles made it over the 50:50 ratio of NDS's - now on 5. 

Had a busy, but successful day at work yesterday, but did little else! Need to think about my uni course over the weekend, and hopefully see DGF just for a walk.

Delights and gratitudes for yesterday:

- having chicken, salad, and dahl in the fridge, ready to feed myself!
- lovely call with DD
- Lovely call with DGF!

ditty1234

Hi Morning Turtles, I hope everybody is ready for spring to come back next week sometime. It's been a cold one. I think finally got a second nsd day in yesterday, but then I had to go to the postoffice and send my documents for my passport which was planned - but I could not do it till yesterday when my colleague (finally) did the verification of my identity! 
Today is my last day off and I shall celebrate by going for a long walk and cooking a roasted leg of lamb for boys.

mothernerd

Buffythedebtslayer said:

Wow Mothernerd. 
Just WOW. That is a total palaver. I really hope your foot is ok. Why on Earth didn't your mum ring the Grand daughter. 
It is all a bit bananas  as in the lengths we go to get the pills! X  

Why couldn't she just check the packet when it came or leave it out until I had time to do it?  I had a health scare about 18 months ago, didn't mention it at first so as not to worry her but then got the third degree about why I had been to the doctor's. The next day when I visited she calmly said that if I could no longer look after her, she would ask the grand-daughter who previously looked after her to resume (thanks for the compassion, mum).

Buffythedebtslayer

mothernerd said:

Buffythedebtslayer said:

Wow Mothernerd. 
Just WOW. That is a total palaver. I really hope your foot is ok. Why on Earth didn't your mum ring the Grand daughter. 
It is all a bit bananas  as in the lengths we go to get the pills! X  

Why couldn't she just check the packet when it came or leave it out until I had time to do it?  I had a health scare about 18 months ago, didn't mention it at first so as not to worry her but then got the third degree about why I had been to the doctor's. The next day when I visited she calmly said that if I could no longer look after her, she would ask the grand-daughter who previously looked after her to resume (thanks for the compassion, mum).

Just sending love. I have the identical conversations with my mum and currently in a state today as she is refusing meds, food and drink. I am back at work on Monday so no idea what I am going to do! 

Toni'sfriend

I really feel for both of you. My late mother had a similar kind of personality and it is so incredibly difficult to deal with. It's just continual stress. Hugs to you both. xxx