Organising a funeral during Covid

SevenOfNine

My understanding was that the temporary legislation had been 10, immediate family, safe distancing, but I was soon put right on that! It seems council owned crems can make the choice of how many allowed (I don't think FDs play a part in the decision?).  Maybe it is reflected on the size of the premises, how many fit easily a safe distance apart. Some people did say the number was zero! Our crem has 2 funeral rooms, both huge, but I suppose they all have to minimise gatherings before/after.

It seems generally, many areas of the legislation brought in as the response to covid is open to 'interpretation' by local councils & different Police forces.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that several areas have locked their cemeteries. Simply & suddenly "no entry" & gates padlocked. What for? Hardly parks or known picnic areas! 

Hopefully there will be no change for the funeral, as if it's not bad enough.

Dymphna60

Re locking cemeteries- you might think Sevenof Nine that only a few people would be visiting but ask people that live near one . People driving to exercise in them and groups of young bored people gathering to talk , smoke and drink as well as mischief. And that is in addition to those that are going to ignore the limits on numbers at grave side ceremonies and go along to ‘Dave from the club’ funeral anyway. 

As usual it is the few that make these things necessary. 

gwynlas

When I was growing up funeral services  were held at home for family members and generally only the men attended the burial.
With the increase in cremations women started attending the services there,
Many people including Princess Margaret have had direct cremations with services held elsewhere.
It is only in these more affluent times that relatives might return home to attend funerals, certainly the £10 poms would not have been able to.
With todays technology it is easy enough to be connected by mobile phone so other mourners can listen in to service wherever they are.

Flugelhorn

gwynlas said:

When I was growing up funeral services  were held at home for family members and generally only the men attended the burial.

My mother described much in her welsh childhood - the service at home and then the graveside / chapel service for the men only while the women stayed behind to make the tea. I think as you say a bit later the women started attending 

MoneySeeker1

SevenOfNine said:

My understanding was that the temporary legislation had been 10, immediate family, safe distancing, but I was soon put right on that! It seems council owned crems can make the choice of how many allowed (I don't think FDs play a part in the decision?).  Maybe it is reflected on the size of the premises, how many fit easily a safe distance apart. Some people did say the number was zero! Our crem has 2 funeral rooms, both huge, but I suppose they all have to minimise gatherings before/after.

It seems generally, many areas of the legislation brought in as the response to covid is open to 'interpretation' by local councils & different Police forces.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that several areas have locked their cemeteries. Simply & suddenly "no entry" & gates padlocked. What for? Hardly parks or known picnic areas! 

Hopefully there will be no change for the funeral, as if it's not bad enough.

This is a modern liberal efficient City Council where the crematorium is and an area used to interpreting things the most liberal way possible by and large - as they'd soon get challenged if they didnt. So the CC shouldnt be a problem - they are quite high calibre. 

Even the smallest room in the crematorium is big - so that shouldnt be a problem. The size of it would allow for everyone to have several benches each.

MoneySeeker1

gwynlas said:

When I was growing up funeral services  were held at home for family members and generally only the men attended the burial.
With the increase in cremations women started attending the services there,
Many people including Princess Margaret have had direct cremations with services held elsewhere.
It is only in these more affluent times that relatives might return home to attend funerals, certainly the £10 poms would not have been able to.
With todays technology it is easy enough to be connected by mobile phone so other mourners can listen in to service wherever they are.

Admits I've never even heard of men-only services. I've only ever known them to be "mixed and equal". That's news to me that that happened....

I've asked the funeral director to do a remote link-in so I can be "virtually present" - and was rather surprised he didn't seem to be already "well up and running" on doing that and been doing it for years (given the location)! He is in process of arranging that. Though the towns surrounding the city are noticeably more old-fashioned than the city (though they are so close in distance) and he and my parents house are in one of those towns.

Flugelhorn

not really relevant to the OP at the moment but this describes the old traditional welsh funerals with the service at the house and then again at the graveside  https://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/wales/entries/9c24f1e1-d62c-3e28-a1db-7664cad06183

Robin9

MoneySeeker1 said:

I've asked the funeral director to do a remote link-in so I can be "virtually present" - and was rather surprised he didn't seem to be already "well up and running" on doing that and been doing it for years (given the location)! He is in process of arranging that. Though the towns surrounding the city are noticeably more old-fashioned than the city (though they are so close in distance) and he and my parents house are in one of those towns.

I know our local crem which is only a couple of years old can do this but I think it's quite new.
My local church has only been asked once in the years I have been involved in the funerals (about 500) there.  It was a lot of money and involved getting contractors in.

MoneySeeker1

He mentioned a figure of £90 if he could get a remote link-up arranged - which I felt was quite high - but agreed to.

It's just something he said verbally - but he's due to contact me back on that. I'll send him an email specifically about that - just to make sure there's something in writing about the sort of figure I'm anticipating - so it can't be any higher.

SevenOfNine

Dymphna60 said:

Re locking cemeteries- you might think Sevenof Nine that only a few people would be visiting but ask people that live near one . People driving to exercise in them and groups of young bored people gathering to talk , smoke and drink as well as mischief. And that is in addition to those that are going to ignore the limits on numbers at grave side ceremonies and go along to ‘Dave from the club’ funeral anyway. 

As usual it is the few that make these things necessary. 

We visit one pretty much alternate days, never a longer gap than 2 days, for over 4 years now.  Different times of the day, different days of the week, there's never been more than a handful of people tending graves.  It's huge, very old & bordering on 'full', but never been any evidence of yobbo behaviour, not even at about 3:30 when some from a secondary school nearby shortcut through to the town on the way home. I've never even seen one step off the central pathway, or be disrespectful ( which is a surprise).  Some dog walkers, mostly on leads (the dogs that is).  Maybe we're just lucky, houses on 2 sides, 3 storey old peoples home opposite & an ambulance park-up place. Though I take your point, I'm relieved it's not being locked.