Talk me down please 2

mellymoo74

The charities have no space 
I have spent the last 3 weeks trying to get them a spot even using the threat of this from an email a couple of weeks ago as evidence.
I'm veering toward the police now to be honest I have many many many abusive messages. 

Docs address changed, housing have removed me from the tenancy. 
I already feel guilty enough my heart is absolutely broken keep thinking they would still be alive if I hadn't left

elsien

In no way is this your fault melly, although in your situation I would be feeling  horribly guilty as well. Unwarrantedly so. You did your best to find them somewhere but we live in hard times where options are limited.
This may not be the right time so apologies if it's insensitive. And you know that I adore Gitdog from the bottom of my  heart and would be devastated if anything happened to him. But the bottom line is that when it comes to it people come first. You come first, Your life comes first.  You had to get out for your own sanity. And if your dogs are gone, at least you know they are safe now and can't come to any more harm.  That doesn't ease the hurt but it may ease some of the guilt.

Pollycat

elsien said:

In no way is this your fault melly, although in your situation I would be feeling  horribly guilty as well. Unwarrantedly so. You did your best to find them somewhere but we live in hard times where options are limited.
This may not be the right time so apologies if it's insensitive. And you know that I adore Gitdog from the bottom of my  heart and would be devastated if anything happened to him. But the bottom line is that when it comes to it people come first. You come first, Your life comes first.  You had to get out for your own sanity. And if your dogs are gone, at least you know they are safe now and can't come to any more harm.  That doesn't ease the hurt but it may ease some of the guilt.

Oh, Elsien.

You've said it so well.

Archergirl

Well all I can say is you know in your heart that you did all you could to try to rehome them, but nobody knew what a vindictive monster he could be and this has just confirmed that you did the right thing. The worst thing that could happen has happened and you are surviving it, yes it will be tough for you without them (but not him....lol) and it will now be easier for you to find a place and in their memory you will rebuild your life into something so great you will be amazed how happy you can be ...Take care and look after yourself, it will p*** him off no end to see you thriving xx

mellymoo74

I did
I left anyway
That's the guilt I will have to bear

MovingForwards

The guilt will ease in time, your strength will increase and you will find your feet. One day you will stop thinking of the past and focus on the now, plan dreams and make them come true. Then the past will feel like it was someone else's life.

BellaLasagna2018

mellymoo74 said:

I did
I left anyway
That's the guilt I will have to bear

I understand that you feel guilty. It’s natural, you’re a good person. Remember that HE did it, of his own accord. You didn’t make him do it. HE wanted to hurt you, and so he went ahead with this callous, calculated, cruel act. 
You shouldn’t feel guilty. You should feel angry. Try and turn that anger into strength to help you build a better future, away from him and free. 

mellymoo74

I am angry 
Very angry
I am currently waiting for a support worker so we can get the ball rolling on divorce and figure some other stuff out 

Archergirl

You have every right to be angry and this will spur you on.....but please don't be hard on yourself, you did what was right at the time, that is all we can do...hugs......The best you can do now is go out there and lead a happy life free from the tyranny you faced for so long from that selfish, ungrateful, deceitful b*****d xx 

mellymoo74

Today and 6 months ago