Embracing the new family dynamics and looking forward to the future with optimism

pollyanna_26

This is a long area of coastline hb2. It is also a protected area due to rare endangered wildlife and various flora and fauna.

For many yeats the lighting of fires and use of BBQs has been banned all along the extensive beach.

Yesterday was another nightmare. Visitors blocked peoples driveways because the car parks are still under lockdown. People in wheelchairs and mumsi with prams were forced to use main roads. I could hear the air sea rescue flying back and forth all day,fire engine sirens and police. The lifeboats attended a lot of incidents including young children who'd drifted out to sea on inflatables.. Both police and air sea rescue were flying back and forth all day.

I saw footage of taxies from Yorkshire which had pretty well travelled here in convoy. Dd 1 lives in Yorkshire and it's a long way from here.

In normal times we welcome those who come here and treat the area with respect. In summer taxi firms bring underprivilaged and disabled youngsters here for a day at the seaside. Many have never seen a beach let alone the sea. The taxies are covered in balloons and we love to wave to the children..

We've never had a year this bad. There are visitors who don't behave well . Many seem to go into the nearest pub get drunk and cause problems in town.Despite all emergency services running themselves ragged recently it's been a nightmare. They're already stretched with the Corona crisis and really could do without these idiots.

No horses yesterday sadly. That's another victim of the cuts and is below strength now.

They are very effectiive when available. In normal times they visit here often. When the children were little I always had to have sugar lumps and carrots in my bag when we went to town. My children learned all about the police and their horses and nothing was too much trouble for the offocers. We knew the names of both horses and riders and the children knew they could trust a policeman.

It's always been a close community here and recent events have been heartbreaking. All the recent very hot weekends must have been unbearable for those in full uniform.

All my life I've veiwed anger as a useless emotion. I got rid of the anger re dds wrong diagnosis which ruined many years of her life by deciding on action. It took over 20 years to turn things around but we got there in the end.

We're going to work as a community to try to help in this situation. There are a lot of wealthy prople in this area and they stepped up fpr full PPE. We'll see if horses can be sponnsored on an ongoing basis because there's no need for idiot versus police officer, coastguard or other personal engagement when they're around.

Living so close to the sea I hear the warning go off and the see the flares go off as the lifeboats are needed. Night time is the worst as I know they are setting out on a wild, choppy sea with constantly shifting tides. My dad served in the Royal Navy he came home safe but affected by the loss of ship mates. Two uncles were changed for ever. I learned the words of for those in peril on the sea as a child and I say them in my head until all are safely back.

Our lifeboats are not RNLI funded but depend on donations ,legacies and a small charity shop which has been shut in the current situation.

We have possibly the worst MP in the history of MPs . He never responds to anyone. Ignores urgent emails etc but I think he'll be getting so much feedback soon he wont know what's hit him.

With a bit of luck he'll go back to where he came from and we'll get someone earning their money by acting on behalf of the locals.

pollyx

pollyanna_26

gizmo111 said:

NatalieSav said:

From your posts it looks as if your DGD spent a few days at her mums. If she did it’s a clear breach of lockdown rules. For the last 10 weeks I’ve done nothing but walk to a supermarket, go to a local shop and a community group who are giving away meals (with social distancing observed in all places ). I didn’t sit in a park on my own until Saturday. I’m in a flat and it’s been very hard going at times. I’ve not seen my brother in months now, we text. The rules apply to us all and I know some high profile people have broken them but that’s not the point. It looks like there’s going to be a second wave in August and that’s because of people who didn’t stick to the lockdown rules. The end result is going to be a longer time period before things return to normal. 
Children can be carriers, they can also become very ill if they catch it. Unless you know who your DGD has been with at all times and you know that they themselves haven’t been near anyone with symptoms allowing her to go to her mums was a really silly move. Particularly as you have 2 very young kids in your care. 
We are in lockdown for a reason, 40k plus people are dead. 

Seems to be a subject that oddly interests you - so I suggest you read the following so you know what you are talking about when you accuse someone of breaching lockdown.
https://www.judiciary.uk/announcements/coronavirus-crisis-guidance-on-compliance-with-family-court-child-arrangement-orders/
Government guidance issued alongside the Stay at Home Rules on 23rd March deals specifically with child contact arrangements. It says:
“Where parents do not live in the same household, children under 18 can be moved between their parents’ homes.”
This establishes an exception to the mandatory ‘stay at home’ requirement; it does not, however, mean that children must be moved between homes. The decision whether a child is to move between parental homes is for the child’s parents to make after a sensible assessment of the circumstances, including the child’s present health, the risk of infection and the presence of any recognised vulnerable individuals in one household or the other'
Further the following may interest you so you are in full possession of the facts and guidance from the Courts and Cafcass
https://www.cafcass.gov.uk/grown-ups/parents-and-carers/covid-19-guidance-for-children-and-families/

Have a nice day.

Well that's nice and ckear Gizmo. Hopefully that will stop the verbal bashings Ss has had. I'd keep it handy. No doubt at some point someone else will pop in to have a pop at Ss.

I've given up on trying to respond to those who have no idea of rhe rules and for some reason feel it their duty to post a lot of useless opinions.

I;ve noticed a couple of similar posters are missing recently. Being a newvie doesn't mean you haven't posted in the past under a different user name.

Anyway I wont waste time responding to similar posts.

I'll repeat I'm the mother of 2 keyworkers and also a dd in the extremely vulnerable group. Under shielding since early March and didn't rush outdoors this morning. Isn't likely to do so until any spikes or possible Tsunamis have been and gone. She cannot risk going into hospital so when her Gp tells her it's safe to go outdoors she'll be guided by him.

At no time have I believed Ss has been less than considered and aware of the rules. If I'd thought so I would have said so.

That is my last word on the subject. No doubt there'll be another one along soon but I'll skip past.

Hope you've had a good day Ss.

How are things with you beanie?

pollyx

hb2

Polly, we've had some terrible heathland fires here recently, mostly caused by portable BBQs - such an awful loss of habitat and wildlife, as well as the danger to human life I despair at the stupidity of people think that their few minutes of pleasure is worth more than anyone or anything else.

We have the RNLI training school here and friends who have been crew. 'Let not the deep swallow me up' is close to my heart. 'For those in peril on the sea' is sung every Sunday service on the cruise ships and always feels very real, even though we (hope) we are safe and sound.

I'm pretty much ignoring the people who come out of their holes only to criticise and insult.

pollyanna_26

The wild fires have been a terrible problem in the NW in the last few years hb2. Not too near here but we could smell the smoke when Winter Hill and other parts were ablaze. As you say it's such a terrible loss for nature.

I was listening to a young farmer who lives near here talking about the poor outlook for farming this year. We had a drought warning a few days ago and are warned to minimise our use.

I watched the helicopters dropping huge amounts of water on the fires in the last couple of years and it makes me wonder how we ever got into this state.

I've been an environmentalist all my life but I fear certain behaviours over recent years have wiped out much good work done in the past.

I understand many people enjoy their BBQs. I've never owned one but part of that was due to the fact I've had chronic bronchitis since childhood and all 3 dds are asthmatic at various levels. If people act in a responsable way it shouldn't be a problem but the deliberate setting of fires seems to be more and more common now.

Each time the hordes have turned up here this year the beaches have been littered with left behind disposable BBQs and rough fires still burning. Add in the litter etc and it seems a lot of people don't give a damn.

A lot of it is feral behaviour and it concerns me that youngsters aren't learning how to behave. If you lack a decent role model there's no hope for the future. That way of life becomes the norm and continues through the generations.

Sometimes I think myself as a so called Baby Boomer had the best of times. Financially I'm not wealthy . I own my home but that was through hard work and a fear of debt. My parents believed strongly in education which helped a great deal.

I just wonder how we went from the hope of the post war years to where we are now.

I was thinking earlier it's only the 1st of June and already this area has taken a real bashing.. All the clearing up etc will have been costly for both services and the local council.

I will never forget the summer of 76. We moved here a few months earlier and when the heatwave began I had a little redhead and a blond child all 3of us fair skinned. Nights were sleepless and the sun beat down day after day. I said to dd earlier this feels like 76 and she said I hope not I wasn't born then but it's not something I'd cope with.

I know many love the sun but I'll be doing a rain dance. Our regional forecast is promising rain on Wednesday so I live in hope.

Like yourself I can't sit for long in the sun. I have a wooden arbour covered in Honeysuckle and I tend to sit in there for a while.

pollyx

Savvy_sewing

Thankyou Gizzmo for finding the correct information.
 I had a phone call yesterday from one of the social workers who did my assessment on having the boys. 

He said he had a message to call me and was everything ok? So I updated him on every thing. He said that he will find out who the post adoption team is (they deal with SGO). Also asked about the fact the court papers are still wrong on the birthday of one of the children.
Makes me wonder if one of the busybodies decided to give them a call about us? Anyway he was fine about Dgd  going to see her Mum, and that the Boys can go and see their Mum again now her Mum has finished her isolation after returning from Vietnam at the beginning of all this. It will still be an outside meeting at her stable yard hopefully this weekend. 

At least if anyone wants to bash me, we know that we have taken all the right precautions and are Not breaking the rules, and we also know that children are not necessarily super spreaders, or they would not be allowed to return to school.

 I have the hospital appointment this morning about my hand. I will know if I have to stop working again or if using my hand is actually better physio in the long run.
 I managed to make 24 face masks of the usual pleated design and 6 specially ordered Olsen designed masks. But it took me from 10.30 until 5.45 while DS tried to look after the boys. I say tried because he still had a headache which got worse ( but he didn't tell me until 5.44!) He has an appointment with the doctors tomorrow morning I believe. He has had a migraine for nearly a week now.

Biggests Hubby has already found a rental house and moved out over the weekend. So life for her is going to be very different moving forward.
Twin2 messaged me to say her BF is leaving as well. 

Looks like lockdown has taken its toll. 

Time to get the boys dressed and ready for a short time in school. Only 3 hours for Dgs1. As the new rules are in he has to be in a bubble with different children then he has been with over the last term. 

I hope he will adjust ok. Especially to the new rules. 

hb2

Savvy, thanks for the update. I'm very glad, for your sake, that you have had official confirmation that you have done nothing wrong in letting GD visit her mother (thanks for the 'from the horse's mouth' info Gizmo). I do hope that will shut the 'bashers' up, although I fear they will find something else to carp about instead  Whatever happened to the old adage 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all'?? I have read posts/threads with which I disagree, I tend to just move on and find something else. . . 

I hope you get some helpful advice from the clinic today, and that your poor hand is soon feeling better.

I have dark brown hair, blue eyes and fair skin that burns easily (about the only thing my father ever gave me!). My BFF and her sons, my Godsons, are all redheads, so keeping out of the sun is second nature for all of us. We have rain forecast from tomorrow and temps back down to mid/high teens. Hopefully that will serve the double purpose of damping down vegetation, so that fires are less likely, and keeping the idiots away.

pollyanna_26

The call from the social worker may be no more than checking things are OK Ss. Our GP practice are phoning both myself and dd to keep up to date on how things are. At least yet again it confirms you are doing the right thing whatever the bashers may think.

As a primary school teacher I had to contact safeguarding a number of times but only when it was very obvious a child was either neglected or at risk' It's a decision  that is made after speaking to the head and is never done lightly.

SS are not there for some random person to report someone they do not know and have no real knowledge of the childrens welfare.

People do it but it takes valuable time away from those who really need Safeguarding to step in.

I hope your appt goes well. Whether it's cann sew or can't sew please do as instructed .

Best wishes to Biggest in her new life. I hope financial support will be coming from her husband.He can't just walk away and not look back.

Did twin2 go back home? I thought when she left she was nearer to you.

I;m wondering if DS wears glasses. I only have them for reading but due to the current situation am well overdue an eye test. I'd already realised my current strength weren't right anymore and have been screwing up my eyes and had some blinding headaches., That's led to more typos than usual. The hayfever confuses things , It;s been very bad so far this year and my sinuses have been stuffed up and painful at times.Years ago I used to have awful migraines . The sort where you need to lie down in a dark room until it passes. so I can understand how your son must feel. Matbe a break from the XBox would help. I;m not joking if he;s still on it a rest could help.

Hope your little man copes with the bubble. It has been set up gradually over recent weeks in the nursery dd2 is helping at the moment.. They;ve tried to do it in baby steps with varying results. Children on the spectrum  have found it difficult at times as the usual pattern of things has altered but so have the keyworkers children. Nursery has aimed to keep close friends in small groups to try to have some sort of normality.

pollyx

pollyanna_26

Savvy_sewing said:

missbishi said:

Interesting first post NatalieSav ...

Unusual for a newbie to find my post.
join and comment.

Something has been niggling away in the back of my mind since reading the 2 Newbie posts. I've just realised what it is. In both posts a certain word was used. Not a word normally used in posts here. It may be coincidence but it is a word much used by a very prolific Ss basher in their ranty ill informed posts.. I remember it because it used to irritate me, There are better words to use.

Ss you do not need to spend time and energy responding to these keyboard warriors. Your call from Ss has once more confirmed you are aware of the rules and complying with them.

You have a busy life and any spare moments in your day are better used for a bit of peace and enjoyment rather than responding to those who have too much time and nothing better to do than verbally abuse someone they know nothing about.

Perhaps the nothing to see here move on method may work for us all. I've learned it's a waste of time and energy trying to reason with such people.

There is no forum rule that posts must be responded to. There is however the Be nice to all moneysavers rule which they don't seem aware of.

Cut off the oxygen supply and they're ranting into the ether .

pollyx

beanielou

Hope that your appointment goes well 

Savvy_sewing

I was at the hospital for quite some time.
 I saw the consultant, had 3 X-rays, back to the consultant, a wait for an orthopaedic surgeon, another examination, a consultation between the two and a meeting with a physio. 

The break has heeled nicely but there is ligament damage on my middle finger and there "could possibly " have been a bone float? A chip on the finger they missed. One thought my finger had rotated but the other decided that it is the ligament not the bone and hence physio.
what ever it is it's very painful. But actually keeping using it except don't lift with it. So I have exercises to do, and then a follow up call from physio on 16th June.
 I was there so long I had to get Dgd to collect DGS 1 for me. Biggest was at the house so I was not too worried. However I didn't get much sewing done when I got back as I had to also get Dgs2 by 3pm
I  am resigned to resting up for the rest of the afternoon and just dealing with the kids.
 I forgot I was supposed to go to my Mums to help her out the foot back on her embroidery machine. So I will have to do that tomorrow now.
 I am extremely tired today so I see another early night tonight. Once small people are settled.