Embracing the new family dynamics and looking forward to the future with optimism

Savvy_sewing

So I had fired off another email yesterday and threatened the MP or to sue them and funny I just had a phone call from the housing saying they will send a surveyor and a company to quote for the work.
doesnt help me today but at least the Merry go round of the emails has stopped and someone is taking action.
I wonder how long the wait will be. 

Savvy_sewing

The contractor is on his way to survey the drains ( won't take Anglian waters word for it,) amazing what a threat can do to make the Housing Association move. 

thorsoak

Fantastic!

hb2

Well done Savvy! You shouldn't have had to make those threats but at least things are moving now.

I love all animals, even rats, but not inside my home! My cat brought a huge one in the other week and my OH discovered, when he went to remove it, that it was not dead  I would prefer the cat to leave the live ones outside . . .

It is pouring with rain down here in Poole today.

Savvy_sewing

hb2 said:

Well done Savvy! You shouldn't have had to make those threats but at least things are moving now.

I love all animals, even rats, but not inside my home! My cat brought a huge one in the other week and my OH discovered, when he went to remove it, that it was not dead  I would prefer the cat to leave the live ones outside . . .

It is pouring with rain down here in Poole today.

It's raining here as well. 

The rain is hindering the drain fella. It looks like there are more than one broken pipe. This could be costly for the housing association. Looks like when they installed my bathroom 10 years ago they left a drain going nowhere, and when they put the new concrete out side and swapped the cover etc they didn't join up the plastic to the old pipe. 

Fun then as the path looks like it is going to have to come up. 

Savvy_sewing

I am shattered. 

The boys have been especially naughty today. The intervention team sent a lady to talk to me. Which was very difficult as the kids were "on form "
I am at my whits end with them. I need sleep which because of the rats I am not getting.
Biggest is down and rang to off load, so the pair of us have had a good moan. 

I need to get sleep.
 I need to get out.
 I am pummelled to death.
thank goodness they have the holiday club tomorrow.
 I had planned to do so much but they have made it totally impossible for me.
Every time I walk out of the room they are screaming and shouting, using toys to hit each other and both winding the other up. They won't even sit still to eat lunch.'
I have 20 hours to get through then I can get 6 hours off. 

fozziebeartoo2

I am so sorry and sad to hear how hard this is becoming your you SS.

I totally take my hat off to you. I am 61, not in great health and much as I adore my grandchildren, I know there is no way I could cope with them full time.

I think your love and devotion to your family is amazing. I am full of admiration for you.

Now to the horrible "elephant in the room" for me (as someone not involved, and not struggling to get through, and NOT walking in your shoes) and I apologise in advance.....

But is it just me who remembers the terribly hard decision you made a while back, that you could not take on the little boys full time?
You struggled with the decision and decided it was best for everyone. 

And then what seemed suddenly (of course it wasn't in your real life) everything changed and you had decided to take on the little boys.....

I don't suppose for a moment you regret your decision but it IS possible to decide that the situation cannot continue now, for everyones sake.
Is there a tiny little part of you who thinks that as much as love the boys, this may not be the best life for them or you or DGD ?

I apologise again, but I remember how you said you felt before, you had hope again, you had possibilities to fulfil your plans, with you and DGD moving forward together. You were optimistic.

Now you are exhausted. Worn out and struggling.

Please think of YOU.

onwards&upwards

I agree, and think of the boys, think how things might be for them now if they had a fresh start with committed adoptive parents, not a dad who flies in and out as he fancies and doesn’t seem at all bothered about them, and a granny who is physically and emotionally exhausted and can’t cope.  

Think about your granddaughter too, coming into her teenage years and not getting what she needs because the two little boys take up so much time and space and energy.  You don’t want the next baby to be hers, and the next unprepared and unsuitable parent to be her. 

Grumpelstiltskin

Savvy you can't carry on like this, you don't want things to come crashing down with someone being hurt or worse.
It will come to that if things just carry on as they are.
Do  you want to end up in hospital or worse one of the children end up in hospital?
You have to say enough is enough and you just can't cope any more. It's not admitting defeat it's just showing you can't do everything on your own with no back up.

Savvy_sewing

I doubt the next baby will be hers as she is gay. But I do understand.
the early intervention team finally sent in someone to do an assessment this morning.
 Or the start of it. Of course once again they want a family tree and history!
how many times do I have to repeat it?
its the here and now I need support with and surely the history should be there for all professionals to access?
DS finally turned up at 3.15
he has decided to take the kids with him for tea and taken pjs so he will get them ready for bed.
so me?
 I have just come up to bed and I am going to sleep! I hope.