So fed up

ckerrd

And if people are worried about the price then they are not worth buying a present for, IMHO.

I have given and been given expensive presents and also very cheap ones that have had some great degree of thought put into them. Home made ones can be really nice and personal. (and cheap)

mrcow

Seriously, how do some people get so materialistic? Is it something they are born with or something that develops later in life once they start earning money?

I'm afraid that I'd have to dig my heels in. £15 is too much per child anyway.

Call your sister and tell her that you're spending a tenner in future, so she can spend a fiver each on your two.

cjbjb

Correct me if I'm wrong but, I thought that Christmas was all about 'Season of Goodwill' not a time to spend money that you resent. I say by the gift you feel is most appropriate for the person each year. There will be years that you will want to spend more and others when you can't. All gifts should be given with love and the monetary value is not important.
My partner and I have decided that we will spend only £10 on each other and have done for the past few years and it work a lot better. I have more fun deciding what to get knowing that if he doesn't like it I haven't wasted much but will bring joy on the day and for me the aim is to buy about 10 presents.

Don't be bullied into doing something you are not happy with.

loobylou2

I totally sympathise with you. I have 3 children and my sister just has 1. She and her husband both work whilst we survive on just my income as my husband is a lot older than I am and has retired. I find buying presents for her incredibly stressful and to be honest I"d sooner just spend my money on my 3 rather than on my niece as she has or gets everything she wants as soon as she asks for it. It wouldn"t bother me in the least if my sister didn"t spend money on my 3 either as they don"t want for anything. Like you though I feel obligated to spend large amount on my niece although I have very little contact with her. I think though that at the end of the day its the thought that counts and so this year, I really am just going to stick to what I can afford to spend not what I think I should spend given that I have 3 children and she just has the 1. Its not a competition you know and if your sister says anything to you I"d tell her that!!! You don"t have to spend more than you can afford!!!

Norma_Desmond

I'm shocked that anyone feels that they *have* to buy certain gifts for selfish, mercenary, materialistic relatives.

We gave up on the commercial side of Christmas some years ago after a comment from an in-law that the computer game we were getting the child 'wasn't enough'; this from people who were getting said child a Playstation as a 'stocking filler'.

We promptly bought the kid a charity cow for an African village - I think it made our feelings clear enough.

katskorner

I would not tolerate that at all. Who does she think she is saying you have to spend so much - noone would do that to me!! I have two little sons and do not expect people to spend a fortune on them - far from it, I would rather they have any money put in the bank for their future and just a few gifts. They can't play with it all anyway.

Friends of mine prefer to take my eldest son out for a day rather than buy him a present as then they get to spend time together and have new experiences which they think is far more important. This year they have even offered to take me and my youngest out with my son for his birthday. It is such a caring way of doing things as it is something meaningful

If anyone said to me - spend £30 on my daughter, then I am afraid I would give them short shrift and tell them that Christmas is not to do with spending and if they think it is then they are sadly mistaken!

I really feel for you. Do not let yourself be bullied. I am afraid I probably would buy a book (probably the Christmas Story to make a point) and that would be it. (Oh and I would find a discount code too somewhere!!)

belfastgirl23

I would just say why not agree not to buy presents at all for each others kids. That way you can spend the £30 on your own kids (and buy what you like) and she can spend whatever she wants on hers.

This kind of tit for tat takes any joy out of present giving anyway.

loobylou2

Norma_Desmond wrote: »

I'm shocked that anyone feels that they *have* to buy certain gifts for selfish, mercenary, materialistic relatives.

We gave up on the commercial side of Christmas some years ago after a comment from an in-law that the computer game we were getting the child 'wasn't enough'; this from people who were getting said child a Playstation as a 'stocking filler'.

We promptly bought the kid a charity cow for an African village - I think it made our feelings clear enough.

I just want to say that I think this is an excellent idea and its certainly given me food for thought regarding my niece as my sister told me not to buy toys this year but to look out for things which are hamster related!!! ( help, could anyone point me in the direction of things which may be suitable for a hamster obsessed child but are not actually a live hamster!!!) If this fails I may well go for the charity gift option, could you let me know the names of websites who offer these types of gifts??? I"d really appreciate it.

Kantankrus_Mare

Theres loads of stuff you can get for hamsters. There are little balls they run around in and loads of extension type tube things for them to run around. Also stuff for them to nibble on. My kids have had two so Im an expert. They aren't always cheap though.

I have a different kind of problem with nieces.

They are four and five and I swear they have got everything!! Ive even asked my brother what I could get them and he doesn't know

They like dressing up so my mam has gone round all the charity shops and markets and bought tons of stuff for them to put shows etc on. Im sure they will play with these more than any toy!!

belfastgirl23

Oxfam do a really great range of gifts - see this link for school related gifts
http://www.oxfam.org.uk/shop/Browse.aspx?catalog=Unwrapped&category=UWSchoolScene
but you can play around with the catalogue more generally.

And if your sis has a problem wiht it you can point out that it was the easiest way to prove you'd spent £30