I will cut my coat according to my cloth. {Edited by Forum team} 2019

SingleSue

Mooloo - Take a few minutes for yourself, make a cup of tea and try to block off everything going on around you and the anxiety inducing thoughts, even if it is just for a minute or so.

I find that at times like these that it helps to not think too long term and to just think about getting through the next hour otherwise I find myself going into a panic/anxiety breakdown at all the possibilities (mostly the negative ones). So set a task for an hour, go through with it and then set another one...anything to just keep your mind from going over all the fears, upset, panic etc.


I know that the above may be difficult as the stress is so high at the moment but it's my go to way to trying to bring my blood pressure and anxiety levels down when in times of crisis. Doesn't always work fully but it does help (well it helps me at least) to reduce some of the panic/stress mode.

pollyanna_26

Excellent advice from SingleSue Mooloo Easier said than done but slow deep breaths really do help when your thoughts are flying all over the place and panic sets in .
Today will be busy so one step at a time . Not sure if dgd is home from the school trip yet but you'll need to be ready to be strong for her if things are still ongoing .
Biggest and her husband aren't a priority at the moment , they're adults and need to deal with any problems together .
I believe it was my daughter referred to yesterday She isn't a social worker but a senior safeguarding officer , not employed by SS but attends case conferences with them , health professionals and many others involved in childcare .
Petty remarks re shoes and coats were mine . Usually babies just finding their feet will have one pair of suitable shoes and probably soft indoor ones . A warm coat and a lightweight one for warmer weather . They grow so fast during their first year they don't need more although some people will gift outfits . When money is tight it's counter productive to buy things that are soon outgrown .


Sue I've read your signature many times , has anyone ever told you what an amazing mum you are? It must have been a long, hard slog to see your boys achieve their full potential . As a mum with a daughter who needed to be fought for I understand how exhausting and stressful things must have been .
pollyx

SingleSue

Hi Pollyanna

A few have said it but to be honest I didn't feel an amazing mum when going through it, more of a stumbling about blindly mum, lurching from one crisis to another who was hoping for the best

For me, the thing that kept me going was this inkling that what I was doing was better than doing nothing at all (which was the reality with the lack of provision and services here) or just dutifully going along with the herd like a good little girl.

It did ostracise me from the various help groups though, my methods were not the norm because I refused to just accept it and treat them like special little princes who needed to be wrapped in cotton wool and never have their autism challenged (not their diagnosis, that was never a doubt but its impact on them). In my book there was never a can't do, only a can do but might need to think about a way around it to be able to do it.

A special moment recently was youngest son turning around to me and saying "I'm glad I have you as my mum, without you I wouldn't be at university, I wouldn't be living, I would still be stuck behind that wall, closed off unable to access society and a normal life. Thankyou" (All said in an unemotional, no nonsense monotone...never did get that bit sorted :rotfl:)

To be honest, I've never felt I have been amazing, I've made mistakes (lots of them) and that has led to feelings at times of having failed them. Really all I have done is what any parent would do when they go into lioness (or lion) mode , except I added a couple of extra features which luckily worked out for the best.

Savvy_sewing

He got a court order but she is still refusing to hand the children back. This is going to be another long day.

pollyanna_26

Positive vibes Mooloo . Probably going to be a long day but hopefully with a good outcome.
pollyx

beanielou

Positive vibes from me too

Chrystal

Thinking about you and hoping that everything turns out well. ((HUGS))

Savvy_sewing

He has them! Just waiting for them to come home.
Dgds Bedroom blitzed while I have been waiting. My driving license application has been done. Business bills paid.
Major job sub contracted out to another Seamstress I trust. Most urgent jobs being done by my normal Seamstress. My friend is manning the shop.
I am doing the washing, anything to keep me busy.
I have to pop out to get my eyes tested in a few minutes. I am hoping that they get home before I go.

pollyanna_26

Brilliant news Mooloo . Bet the older boy can't wait to be back . It's one way to whip through a lot of tasks in a day while waiting for the resolution but not something you'd want to do every day.
Love to you all,phones etc turned off for bedtime and hopefully sleep all round.
pollyx

beanielou

Good news