Squeaky! (merged with Q and A)

Edinburghlass_2

Good points cristin

Chicken and egg situation really. If more oldstylers use it for CHATTING then you would definitely get the support you want. Aren’t we being a bit insular, elitist and looking down on other areas of MSE by doing this? We are not giving others a chance to join in, to see that we oldstylers have a sense of humour too. In brief, that is simply not fair.

The Arms was started ages ago to take the chat off of the other boards and then split into Discussion so the more serious threads were not interupted by Andrea and her fig rolls (yes even Andrea was guilty of that in those days :rotfl:)

No-one wants to see the humour leave Old Style in any way nor for it to become a board on its own. MSE is a website that encompasses all lifestyles and no one board is any better or worse for that matter than any other.

There are many different people who post on here and many, many more who will never join up to post but just enjoy reading.

The Coffee Corner has already started in the Arms, give it a try, you might even find it fun

redfox

squeaky wrote:

Nah... it's no one thing. Honest.

Squeaky, I know what you mean about the not being able to please everybody, there always seems to be some dissention on decisions the BGs make. It does make it stressful and BGs do get quite a bit of flak which, for volunteers just helping out, is a little hard to take.

You did a great job but if the stress it induces is making life miserable then it's just not worth it. Enjoy your 'retirement' and keep in touch - I will pop round for that cuppa one of these days

squeaky

You'll be very welcome

gravitytolls

Ooh er Squeaky. I hope it wasn't me.

Youknow, you see the same names all over the forum, and it's dead comforting to read posts from familiar 'faces'. I feel as if I have a whole of host of new mates on here, and I expect over time, they will become more than mates, and upgrade to friends.

I can't believe anybody thinks you're doing a poor job Squeaky, and I hope you feel better now you've gone back to being a mate, not a BG.

Chin up, all the posts here must show you how wel regarded you are.:grouphug:

Queenie

cristin wrote:

Squeaky clearly stated this in his very first post in the coffee shop in old style:

squeaky wrote:

This is a coffee shop. And it's Old Style.

So while it is a chat area, the subjects should still be those relating to the usual fare of our Old Style forum……….
So here is where we can have more freedom in allowing the topics to wander a bit.……….as long as the overall content is still Old Style”.

cristin

With respect cristin - that was the "edited" version and was edited after the "coffee shoppe" opened.

To be fair, I say again .... the coffee shoppe opened within 1 1/2 hrs of another thread (by me!) where the potential for a discussion on this subject was begun: "Suggestions for ..... " Had that thread been allowed to run it's course, we would all have had an opportunity to explore the needs/wishes of the majority and how best it could or even shouldn't be done - if done at all!!!!!
That was not possible because based on one person's decision Ye Olde Coffee Shoppe popped up and the actual discussion fell off the page.

crisin wrote:

Lastly, I haven’t noticed “special chat threads” in other forums on MSE don't know why do you? The main reason you apparently haven’t ventured into Moneysavers arms is because you haven’t got the support you get in Old style

I can't answer for Lillibet, nor would I make such assumptions about someone's motives ... but I can answer as someone who posts in Old Style and in The Arms. The Arms has a very unique and special "feel" and flavour to it. Very few "sensible" conversations take place in there - it's light hearted, fun, flippant and cheeky! The Arms has 3 sub-forums: Discussion, Vent and Funny Money.

With the rise in members - many of whom are at home, often without adult company for much of the time - there would appear to be a need for a place to "drop in" and just have a chat about how your day is going - yes, even ( :eek: ) topics such as BB, or a bit of a shoulder if your cat goes missing. It's not what every one wants, or what every one may use ... the fact remains there does appear to be a demand for it! One extremely long thread isn't IMHO the way to go about it though

cristin wrote:

the current Oldstyle Coffee Shop thread has over 540 posts and growing by the minute. It is already the second THE LONGEST thread in the whole of Oldstyle and it has only been opened since 16th May! It is very confusing to newbies to be confronted by this chat style thread as one of the top threads and very easy for them to feel excluded and intimidated!!!

Completely agree - but then had the discussion ensued and any solution been well thought out ... there wouldn't be a need for anyone to feel excluded or intimidated because these issues could have been dealt with then!

cristin wrote:

If more oldstylers use it for CHATTING then you would definitely get the support you want. Aren’t we being a bit insular, elitist and looking down on other areas of MSE by doing this? We are not giving others a chance to join in, to see that we oldstylers have a sense of humour too. In brief, that is simply not fair.

I don't believe it is being insular or elitist and most definately *not* looking down on fellow area's of MSE!!
Each forum is valuable for different reasons and for different people in different circumstances! I don't look down upon the Gambling/Debts/Benefits/etc forums ... they simply are not applicable in my scenario.

In the old days, SAHM's and women who worked part time etc., would rely on a neighbourly chat during the day - how few women in those days suffered from social isolation, depression, lack of confidence, because they had a strong social network and support system? Today, by comparison, it's almost every other one!!

Social interaction is rapidly on the decline for many; some people can go weeks without conversing with another human being. I've read posts on the Marriage/Relationship forums discussing solely the bereavement of a relationship (not person!) and it has no bearing on money saving whatsoever!

How much more Old Style do you need to get then good old tea and sympathy?

Curry_Queen

Queenie wrote:

In the old days, SAHM's and women who worked part time etc., would rely on a neighbourly chat during the day - how few women in those days suffered from social isolation, depression, lack of confidence, because they had a strong social network and support system? Today, by comparison, it's almost every other one!!

This part in particular struck a chord with me! While growing up I remember living in a street where the majority of women were SAHM's and everyone would be in and out of each others' houses to have a natter and coffee between doing household chores. If someone wasn't well, another mum would go and do the shopping or pop a casserole in the oven and bring it round for tea, or look after the kids for a while. Also, as kids, we always knew if mum had popped out to the shops and we needed an adult that we could call on any number of the neighbours for help.

Life isn't like that anymore unfortunately, and in our isolation we are turning more and more to the internet to find companionship, a gossip, bit of support or whatever. I've been around the net for a long time but I've never found anywhere that I feel so comfortable and at home as here on MSE, in particular Old Style, and I truly believe it is something quite unique that has developed here.

I can truly understand why problems occur though because everyone here has different needs and expectations, and we're not all SAHM's but there are many who work full-time and maybe just pop in here during breaks and lunch hours, so of course they don't have time to wade through all the threads/posts and are probably just looking for factual information and tips.

It's only through sensible discussion and people putting forward ideas that we can ever hope to resolve this, which is what I hoped would happen yesterday rather than disintegrating into split factions as appears to be happening in this thread

spendaholic

Perhaps as I started this thread I could ask for it to be closed? We're discussing the same thing in 2 places anyway - or maybe this could be merged with the money saving old style Q&As thread.

Yesterday CQ was upset and offering to stay away. Today a BG has quit. Two other users (who'll remain nameless as they've only PMd and not made their feelings public) are considering "lying low" or "lurking anonymously" for a few days.

I started this thread to alert people to Squeaky's quiet resignation. We've all made our thoughts and feelings perfectly clear, but now I think we should draw a line under it all and move on. Is that possible? Otherwise it could rage for days.

Galtizz

I'll merge this thread with the original Q and A one as, as you said Spendless, it is taking on the same discussion.

I am delibratly staying out of this. For now I am going to leave the thread unlocked because I don't want anyone thinking they haven't had chance to have there say, but please try to keep it friendly and good natured.

It is a shame that some people have decided to stay away and I hope this will all settle down soon and that you'll all come back

Pat__3

redfox wrote:

Squeaky, I know what you mean about the not being able to please everybody, there always seems to be some dissention on decisions the BGs make. It does make it stressful and BGs do get quite a bit of flak which, for volunteers just helping out, is a little hard to take.

You did a great job but if the stress it induces is making life miserable then it's just not worth it. Enjoy your 'retirement' and keep in touch - I will pop round for that cuppa one of these days

I have to agree here with redfox, we are volunteers and devote a lot of time to the site and are really here to help with the smooth running of things.
Takes a bit of pressure off Martin and the MSE team too.

Me too Squeaky for a cuppa and perhaps help you with your geraniums. ( did I spell it right ??) or plants.

They are going to find a big loss on this board now Squeaky with out you.

Pat__3

elvis_bloggs wrote:

I don't know why we have bloody board guides anyway.

Now don't take this the wrong way elvis.;)


But really think about what you said above.:think:

Can you imagine what it would be like without board guides.:eek: