Caught up in a fight over money

Pollycat

Elinore wrote: »

Phew - I got her answerphone. (yeah yeah, total chicken)

Left a message saying i couldn't make it and I will post the blanket first thing, then realised i dont have her new address, but I will work something out.

Because Aida is universally respected there is this powerful unwritten rule that shes just not dragged into family shenanigans, it just doesn't happen. Its like the first rule of family fight club - we don't talk to Aida about family fight club (a position i have coveted for years and would love to know how she made it so)

I am hoping years of conditioning will hold true and they wont want to break the peace for what amounts to...... Oh heck - I thought it was a few quid but on doing the maths i think the 20% think they are due £15K between them.

Well, we will see as the gig is today.

If they are so petty as to uninvite you to a wedding, I think anything is possible.
When money is involved, families can become pretty ugly.
Have any of your previous 'family fight clubs' involved money?

Mojisola

Elinore wrote: »

Because Aida is universally respected there is this powerful unwritten rule that shes just not dragged into family shenanigans, it just doesn't happen. Its like the first rule of family fight club - we don't talk to Aida about family fight club

Has Aida ever been the source of the arguments before?

warby68

I guess you know your family best but its an odd dynamic where you are majorly in the doghouse and being punished but Aida, who actually did the 'offence', will stay in the good books.

If you had agreed with them but noone is allowed to say anything to Aida, what would have happened then?

Elinore

Oh, my family will fight about anything. ( A symptom of a narcissistic meddling matriarch, lots of daughters with similar issues and a healthy dose of competitiveness)

Many many years ago i bought a car off one of the aunts - a rusted beat up old morris minor. The son of the said aunt asked to borrow it, and was insured to do so, he delivered it back to where I lived with the front totally smashed in.

He and i sorted it out as i was off to uni - it was just scrapped. Our mother still have a huge stand up bust up row about it even though they weren't there, has nothing to do with them and we both sorted it out totally amicably.

Literally it gets dragged out to have a fight about if nothing else is currently bubbling. I think i mentioned before that they are a huge dysfunctional mess, right?

Aida, however using some witchcraft or voodoo art is switzerland. Always has been and its like a law.

I will be very surprised if anyone crosses that line, but as you all pointed out money is a game changer.

Pollycat

Elinore wrote: »

Oh, my family will fight about anything. ( A symptom of a narcissistic meddling matriarch, lots of daughters with similar issues and a healthy dose of competitiveness)

Many many years ago i bought a car off one of the aunts - a rusted beat up old morris minor. The son of the said aunt asked to borrow it, and was insured to do so, he delivered it back to where I lived with the front totally smashed in.

He and i sorted it out as i was off to uni - it was just scrapped. Our mother still have a huge stand up bust up row about it even though they weren't there, has nothing to do with them and we both sorted it out totally amicably.

Literally it gets dragged out to have a fight about if nothing else is currently bubbling. I think i mentioned before that they are a huge dysfunctional mess, right?

Aida, however using some witchcraft or voodoo art is switzerland. Always has been and its like a law.

I will be very surprised if anyone crosses that line, but as you all pointed out money is a game changer.

They've had weeks to stew over this matter, to work each other up about the 'injustice'.
I agree money is a game changer but add possible alcohol intake into that mix and it could turn nasty.
I hope not for Aida's sake.

Spendless

Elinore wrote: »

I had totally forgotten about the whole thing. Then yesterday I got a cheque for the money we paid, the ground rent, fees and a little extra as a thank you. Happy days. Thoughts?

Elinore wrote: »

I am hoping years of conditioning will hold true and they wont want to break the peace for what amounts to...... Oh heck - I thought it was a few quid but on doing the maths i think the 20% think they are due £15K between them.

Well, we will see as the gig is today.

I went back and re-read your opening post and saw that Aida even gave back the ground rent and fees to you. I'm not sure if she did the same calculation to the 20% ers but if she did, then I'm guessing once you add that into the equation then the money they think they're 'owed' would be a lot less, since many wouldn't even have thought to refund that bit.

Elinore

As of this morning i have heard no scuttlebut that there was any issue with Aida at the wedding.

That being said my limited access to news was overshadowed by a huge bust up between the father of the husband and one of the aunts - boiled down to one to many comments along the lines of his son being a toyboy golddigger (there is a huge age difference and hes very very handsome young man). Slaps and hair pulling kicked off apparently though later on they were singing dancing and swaying together on the dancefloor.

Someone also stole the top tier of the wedding cake, its not been found. No one has owned up, weird.

Lol families

Sea_Shell

Are you sure you're related to these people?:rotfl::rotfl:. They sound "unique".

Elinore

I was very lucky that i was domiciled outside the UK for most of my youth - with my fathers relatives. They are solid quiet and reasoned people who encouraged my reading and education. (they are also understatedly wonderful and loving people)

My mothers side consider them egghead fuddyduddies and pity them as grey and humorless - My father's side just call my mothers 'the coven' and that's all i have ever hear them say of them.

As such i wasn't indoctrinated into the 'drama equals love' or the 'if there is not a fight where i am involved life is meaningless' ethos of my mother's side. So i have more clarity than most.

Not to say i've not been burned by them - they are quite horrible when they decide you are to be taken to task for some imagined wrong. When you are young and hot blooded its easy to get a embroiled in it, wading in hip deep and throwing punches - weirdly its rather compelling all the adrenaline, drama and gossip can swallow you up.